Rising Dawn
by DC Nixon
Summary: Jasper Whitlock moves from Houston to Forks to live with his father Charlie, there he meets the mysterious and confounding Bella Cullen. With her pale skin and golden eyes it doesn't take him long to figure out she isn't human. Both have mysterious pasts, but will it pull them together or push them apart? *Twilight-ish Ed/Carlisle, Em/R, Alice/Garrett, human Jasper/vamp Bella*
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: **Jasper Whitlock moves from Houston to Forks to live with his father Charlie, there he meets the mysterious and confounding Bella Cullen. With her pale skin and golden eyes it doesn't take him long to figure out that she isn't human. Both have mysterious pasts, but will it pull them together or push them apart? *Twilight-ish Ed/Carlisle, Em/R, Alice/Garrett, human Jasper/vamp Bella*

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Twilight and I'm making no money from this

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter One**

When I landed in Port Angeles Charlie was waiting for me with his police cruiser. It was also raining, but I have a feeling that's going to become a moot point, so I may as well stop mentioning it right now. Mom had told me that I didn't have to go; yes this was my idea, but it was more complicated than that, much more complicated. Let's just say I left Texas covered in scars that I didn't have before living there. It was not ideal. I hated my scars and how I got them. They showed just how weak I was, how I could be easily manipulated, how I would never speak up for myself, but I was going to turn over a new leaf in Forks. I would be a new me.

"It's good to see you, Jasper," Charlie said, smiling at me and I could tell he was happy I was here. "You're getting so tall now and not as scrawny anymore either."

I rolled my eyes. Of course Charlie would mention that. I had actually started lifting weights just trying to gain some muscle mass. It was tough going, but I wasn't going to give up.

"I'm glad you're here," he said, squeezing my shoulder.

"Me too, Dad." This would be good. I would get away from all the darkness and pain in my old life and be able to move onto something more positive.

"I found a good car for you," Charlie said on the way to Forks. I turned to look at him. "Really cheap too."

"What kind of car?" I asked.

"Well, it's a tuck actually, a Chevy. Your mother told me you had a truck back in Texas, so I thought you might want another one."

"What color is it?"

"Black," Charlie said and then smiled. "It's Billy Black's old black truck." He chuckled to himself at the irony. I shook my head. "Do you remember him from down at La Push?"

"No," I answered honestly.

"He used to go fishing with us during the summer, but he's in a wheelchair now. He can't drive so he offered the truck to me. I hope you like it."

"I'm sure I will." I was glad it was black and not some outlandish color, like red or orange. "As long as it gets me from point A to point B it'll be fine," I reassured him.

Charlie let out a grunt of acceptance and we stayed silent for the rest of the drive.

"I want you to be happy here," Charlie said, just outside of Forks.

Although we were similar there was one main difference. I was good with everything to do with emotions, dealing, handling, accepting them, but Charlie not so much. I noted he did better with me around though, so hopefully soon he would settle down and not be as awkward.

"I'm happy to be here too," I told him. "I think it will be good for me."

And nothing more was said on the matter.

We pulled up to the small two-bedroom house Charlie had bought with my mother. It had hardly changed; I was certain Charlie was allergic to change, so it didn't worry me. I spotted my truck instantly and smiled. It sure did remind me of my old truck, but this one looked slightly newer and I liked the black.

"So you like it, huh?" Charlie said and I responded by smiling widely at him and nodding my head. It was a great truck.

* * *

I quickly ran from the small bathroom I shared with Charlie back to my room, towel wrapped around my waist. I had forgotten to take my clothes with me and I didn't want Charlie to see my scars at all. When my bedroom door was firmly shut I looked down at my chest and all the scars that littered it. I hated them. That was one benefit of living here; long sleeves and jackets weren't considered out of the ordinary, so I could easily cover up. I got so many odd looks in Houston, wearing long sleeves on a hot day, but it was easier that way. No one knew about my scars except me and the person who gave them to me and that's the way it would stay.

I went downstairs and noticed that Charlie was already gone. I grabbed a quick breakfast before finding the keys to my new truck and driving to school.

I parked my truck in the lot and then went off to find the office. I could tell that everyone was staring at me, but I kept my head down, focusing on my feet.

Forks High was small, but I thought it would be a welcome change for me. Less people were good. I could keep to myself and work on making positive friendships and relationships and stay away from the destructive kind.

"I'm Jasper Whitlock," I said to the lady in the office. "Chief Swan's son."

"Whitlock?" she questioned me.

"Mother's maiden name," I answered simply. I wasn't sure why I had Renee's name, but in the end it didn't really matter.

"Oh, of course," she said, grabbing everything I needed and explaining it all to me.

I took it all in and headed for my first class. No one bothered me and I liked that, but the moment class ended and I stepped out of the classroom I was approached by a girl with brown hair. I didn't want to get sucked into whatever she was trying to sell me, but I stopped anyway.

"You're Jasper Swan right?" she asked.

"Whitlock actually," I answered and she frowned before shaking it off.

"Okay then, Jasper Whitlock. I'm Jessica Stanley. What's your next class, maybe I can walk with you?"

I looked at my schedule and noticed that it was just down the hall and decided it was better to nip this in the bud right now.

"Thanks for the offer, darlin', but I've got this covered."

She blushed at my use of the word darlin', but it didn't matter. I had used it to describe my last girlfriend and she was anything but, so now it held no meaning, it was actually more of an insult, but Jessica didn't know this. She let out a set of giggles and then left me. I was thankful she was gone.

I walked into my next class, I was early and Jessica was already there; so much for avoiding her. She waved me over and I took the seat next to her. She was very excitable and I had to admit that it was refreshing to witness.

"So, this is a lot different from Texas, huh?" she asked.

"Sure is."

"Does it rain there?" she asked next.

"Yes, mainly during the winter and spring."

"Oh."

Did she really think it was sunny all year round?

Thankfully the teacher came in and I didn't have to answer any more of her pointless questions.

Class passed and Jessica kept on looking at me. It was unneeded. Unfortunately for me we had the next class together as well. This was turning out to be hell. Jessica wasn't that bad, but I didn't need another woman in my life, not after just getting rid of Maria.

Lunch, finally, but I still couldn't shake Jessica. She walked me to the cafeteria and we grabbed our food before sitting down at the same table. It was not ideal, but it was unavoidable. The table was full of her friends and I was introduced to them all. They weren't my usual crowd at all, but maybe that was a good thing. I was polite, but I tried to focus on my food and not everyone staring at me.

"He's so tan," Lauren said, but I didn't even bother to look up.

"I know," Jessica replied.

I could feel someone looking at me, eye drilling into my back. I looked up and glanced around the cafeteria. My eyes landed on a table in the corner and I frowned. There were five teenagers sitting at the table and they did not look like high school students at all. They looked at least twenty if not older. What was this, 21 Jump Street? I kept looking at them, trying to figure them out. The girl with short brown hair looked up and met my eyes, smiling at me. I frowned again.

"Oh," Angela said. "I guess you all owe me five bucks because Jasper's already noticed them."

What? I turned away from the strange teenagers and focused back on my table to see everyone giving Angela five dollars.

"Sorry," Angela said to me, "but we're starved for entertainment here."

"Who are they?" I asked when no one offered an explanation.

"The Cullens," Mike said. "Dr. Cullen adopted them all. The blonde girl and the dark haired guy, that's Rosalie and Emmett, and they're together." I saw Jessica shudder at the thought, but if they were adopted then it hardly mattered. "The one with the weird colored hair is Edward. The short haired girl, that's Alice. And the last one, that's Isabella."

Well that was overly descriptive, not.

"Bella?" I questioned and I don't know why. I had felt something when she was mentioned, it almost felt like something was pushing me in the back and then frustration, I shook it off.

"Oh, no, no, no," Eric said quickly. "Her name is Isabella and you better remember that. Mike tried to call her Bella and she got this murderous look on her eye. We all thought she was going to kill him."

"It was not that dramatic," Mike said, clearly embarrassed.

"He peed himself a little," Angela said and Mike glared at her.

I laughed at that lovely visual. I turned to look at Bella. If she was fierce enough to make Mike piss himself then she must be something special. Bella didn't look up at me, so I decided to roll the dice and try my luck. That was me after all, always trying to get a reaction from people.

"Which one's Bella?" I asked, using her nickname and not her full name.

I kept my gaze on Bella and she looked up at me, she sure did look pissed off. I held her gaze and her face intensified, her eyes hardened. I could sense the fear and panic around me, but I didn't allow it to affect me. I just kept on staring at Bella, daring her to do something, anything, but nothing happened.

I don't know if it was because of me and my actions, but they all stood up as a group and left the table. I watched Bella go and even when she was outside the cafeteria she turned to glare at me. I smiled. I was clearly stronger than Mike because I didn't piss myself. The big guy, Emmett, somehow got left behind and he came walking past our table. I admired him, he was very well-built and I immediately wondered if he could give me some tips on bulking up. He stopped by our table and leaned down to whisper in my ear.

"Watch what you're doing," he warned me, "there's a reason you don't pull the pin out of the grenade without holding the lever down… It goes boom."

I don't see why he needed to add the last part, but he did anyway. I wasn't worried. I always played with fire and I usually got burned. I know I said I was going to change this time around, but why should I? I was wiser now, I could surely handle this. Emmett stood back up and smiled at everyone before leaving the table. He sure did have a dazzling smile.

"Oh my god," Jessica said. "What did he say to you?"

I cocked my eyebrow at her, why was that even important?

"The Cullens don't talk to anyone, only each other," Angela informed me.

That was so strange. Something was definitely going on here and I was going to figure it out. I kept my mouth shut, I didn't owe these people anything.

Lunch ended and so did my next class. My last class of the day was Gym and according to Mike we were playing basketball whilst the girls played volleyball. I got changed into my gym clothes; long sweat pants, a long sleeve grey shirt, and a blue basketball singlet. The moment I stepped into the gym I noticed Bella was here. She was dressed in short blue shorts and a tight grey t-shirt. She looked fucking hot.

"Hey," Mike said, throwing the ball at my back. "Get a room," he said and Bella looked up at me. I smirked at her. "Dude," Mike said, grabbing another ball and attempting to throw it at me.

I turned just in time to catch it and he look surprised. I wasn't slow, I was quick, and I was good at sports. I quickly formulated a plan to play well today to show off in front of Bella. I would show her just how good I could be, how quick. She would be powerless to resist me.

"Dude, stop staring at her," Mike said. "She is way out of your league. She's out of everyone's league. I heard Edward tried to get her and he's basically on the same level as her, but do you know what? She turned him down. She's an ice princess or something."

I ignored Mike's comments and just kept on staring at Bella as she stared back at me.

Class started and I got distracted. We started playing and I was so into the game, dominating everyone, and I didn't even feel a little bit sorry for it. I kept on glancing at Bella to see if she was watching me, but she was focused on her game of volleyball, but I did note that she sucked at it. I had the ball and was about to do a layup when I heard everyone's gasps. I turned just in time to see Bella whack the volleyball unsuccessfully and it came hurtling towards me. She was smirking, so I knew she did it on purpose. I had enough time to deflect it, but I didn't even bother. I would make her pay for trying to hit me.

I reacted by lifting my arms, so that everyone didn't think I just took the hit, but I did it slowly. The ball hit me in the face, right on the nose. It stung and my nose started bleeding, but I didn't even react. Pain was the one thing I was used to and I wanted Bella to know this. I looked at her and she seemed impressed, but also confused. The blood from my nose began dripping and Bella's face scrunched up in disgust. What was her problem? Everyone surrounded me, but I kept my gaze on Bella and watched as she used the commotion to escape unseen, but I had seen her.

I smiled. I think I won that round.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review, it means so much to me

Enjoy

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**Chapter Two**

The next day was better, but I wasn't sure having Lauren stuck to my side and not Jessica was a good thing. They both didn't hold much substance, but I got an offensive vibe off Lauren and I could do without that.

"So are you coming to the beach with us?" Lauren asked.

"Who's going?"

"Like everyone," Lauren answered. "All the boys, they like to go surfing. What about you, have you ever been surfing before?"

I hadn't, but my competitive nature had me wanting to try, though my brain still couldn't move past the fact that it would be too freezing to go surfing at this time of the year.

"No," I answered, "I've never been."

"You should come, even Jess surfs."

"Jessica surfs?" I asked making sure to sound impressed and Lauren got a bad case of sour grapes at that.

"Yes, she does," Lauren said tightly.

"That's so cool," I said, not giving it up. Lauren got sick of me and went off in a huff. It was too easy at times.

I entered the cafeteria and could instantly feel Bella's eyes on me. I didn't look up at her. I just grabbed my food and made my way over to Mike, sitting down next to him. I could sense Bella's anger, but I still didn't look at her.

"Isabella Cullen is staring at you," Mike said and I looked at him. He seemed disappointed, but also impressed.

I made a point of turning my head around, but not enough to look at her. I had my trusty smirk in place and I swear I could feel her rage from here.

I turned back, having never actually looked at her, and said one simple word.

"Huh," I said and I knew it must be pissing her off to no end.

Lunch continued and I could feel Bella staring daggers at me, but I didn't give in. I wouldn't let her win. I knew how all girls worked, the moment you gave them what they wanted they ran the other way and Bella would be no exception to that.

Lunch ended and so did my next class.

I made it to gym and I was excited to see Bella again and maybe even impress her with my basketball skills, only problem, we weren't separated today. I was chosen along with some of the other boys to play volleyball and whose team do I get put on? That's right, Bella's. I wasn't complaining. I could still impress her and this way she would get a close up look at me. Bella came and stood next to me, but I didn't look at her. I just smirked and once again I could sense her anger with me. I wasn't sure exactly why that was. I had always been good with working out how people felt, but it just seemed intensified with Bella.

The whistle was blown and the game began. We only got through a few points before Bella purposefully hit me in the back of the head, hard enough for me to hit the ground. I rolled over onto my back and looked up at her. She looked so apologetic, but I knew better. The teacher came over to see if I was alright and when I didn't respond straightaway she sent me over to the bleachers to recover and seeing as Bella was the one who hurt me she was ejected from the game and tasked with looking after me. I could tell she wasn't happy with this course of action. Mike helped me over to the benches and I sat down. Bella sat down next to me and I turned to look at her, she glared at me.

"Nice shot," I said when she didn't say anything. I rubbed the back of my head. I was fine, no blood this time, it just surprised me.

"Why aren't you intimidated by me?" she asked and I tried to work out why she said it. "Why aren't you scared?" She was feeling frustrated and afraid.

"Why would I be scared of you, Bella?" I asked and she hardened her stare into a glare. I noticed that her oddly colored gold eyes started to darken right in front of me and then she bared her teeth. "What are you doing?" I asked, almost laughing at her.

"Nothing," she said, resigned, softening out her face. "So are you enjoying the rain?"

I let out a laugh at that one and she glared at me.

"You're really going to talk about the weather with me?" I asked. This was all so bizarre. "Look, Bella, I don't need to know your life story and you definitely don't need to know mine."

"Why are you the way that you are?" she asked, not giving up. "I have been around many… people and you are not like any of them."

"Didn't I just say that you didn't need to hear my life story?" I questioned her.

"Why are you wearing a long sleeve shirt?" she asked next, looking down at it.

I didn't allow my face to show any sign of the shock I was currently feeling.

"It's a comfort thing," I answered with a half-truth.

"Why do you call me Bella? My name is Isabella."

What was this? Twenty fucking questions?

"Everyone needs a nickname, Bella, and that's yours. Why don't you like it? It essentially means beautiful."

"So you're calling me beautiful?" she asked, stealing my smirk.

"I never said that," I shot straight back and she huffed in frustration, her smirk disappearing.

"Can't you ever be straight with me?" she asked. "Why are you playing a game with me?"

"Because games are fun," I answered, "especially because I always win."

"Why are you so confident in yourself?"

"Geez, Bella, calm the fuck down. This isn't an interrogation nor is it a talk show. I don't need to answer your questions and you need to stop asking them."

"How old are you?" she asked critically, ignoring my last remark all together.

"Seventeen." I sighed. "How old are you?"

She looked about twenty-three, but I knew she would never answer with that age. Time passed and she kept her mouth firmly shut. She never answered me. I shook my head and focused elsewhere. If she wasn't going to answer my questions then I wasn't even going to bother answering hers.

"You're infuriating," she said, but I kept watching the volleyball game.

Class ended and Bella ran from me. Mike made some remark about me stabbing Bella with a pencil, but I wasn't paying him any attention. He told me that was the most she had ever talked to anyone and I wondered why that was and why she chose me.

I headed for the parking lot and jumped into my truck. I looked around to make sure it was clear and that's when I noticed Bella leaning against the front door of a silver Volvo, staring at me. I smirked and looked away and threw my truck into reverse. I backed out and hit a Toyota Corolla that came out of nowhere. Great. I jumped out to do damage control.

I could feel Bella still staring at me, so I knew that I must put on a show. I looked at who I had hit and I noticed that it was Angela, this would be too easy. I walked over to her door, but not before assessing the damage. There were a couple of small dents on both vehicles, but it wasn't anything major. Angela was clearly in shock. I tapped on her window and she rolled it down.

"Oh, I am so sorry," she started, but I cut her off.

"Nonsense," I said, "forget about that, how are you darlin'?" I asked and she blushed. "Did you hurt yourself? How's your car?"

"Oh, umm," she stuttered. "I'm fine. I just, I didn't mean to hit you, please believe me, Jasper."

She didn't mean to hit me? Technically I was the one who hit her, but apples and oranges.

"I'm glad you're okay," I said, laying it on thickly. "I don't know what I would have done if you were hurt."

I could still feel Bella's gaze on me. I hope she was enjoying the show.

"No, I'm fine," Angela said.

"Your car's a little damaged, just a small dent," I said. "We should exchange insurance details."

I looked deeply into her eyes and smiled.

"Umm, no, it's fine," she said. "I wasn't paying attention, I was…" she petered off. "I was looking at something I shouldn't have been." She flushed again and I saw her look off to the side, at Ben. "Let's just forget it please."

"Okay, darlin'," I said, stepping away. "Drive safe."

She nodded and I watched her leave. I looked up at the Volvo and Bella, but she was no longer there. I smiled, it didn't matter, she had seen what I had wanted her to.

I jumped back into my truck and made it home with no further incidents. When I arrived home I noticed that Charlie wasn't here yet, so I jumped out and looked at the dent in my rear fender. I grabbed it with both my hands and attempted to pull it out. I knew that I couldn't allow Charlie to see it. I wasn't worried about him, I was more worried about him telling my mother that I was in a car accident and I couldn't have that. My mother was the queen of worrying about things that were so inconsequential. My phone rang and I pulled it from my pocket, speak of the devil. I abandoned the fender for now and leaned back against it.

"Hey, Mom," I answered.

"Jasper, it's so good to hear your voice. How's Forks going?"

"Really good," I answered, Bella's face coming into my mind.

"Uh oh, I know that tone of voice young man. I hope you're not causing any trouble."

"No, Mom, I'm just enjoying myself is all. I thought Forks would be so boring because it's so small, but so far it's been fun."

"Okay," she accepted. "And how's it going with Charlie? I know he can be a little..."

"Mom, it's fine. You need to stop worrying. Charlie and I are getting along great."

"Okay, well this is just quick one. Phil's waiting on a call and I still haven't found my phone, so we only have the one." I shook my head at her. I don't think my mother would ever change. "Don't be a stranger," she told me.

"I won't," I promised her, disconnecting the call.

Now more than ever I was certain that I didn't want Charlie to see the dent and call my mother. She was bad enough when she was just checking in, I couldn't imagine how she would be if she knew I was in some kind of accident. I pushed away from the truck and looked at my fender again. There must be a simple way to do this. As I was assessing the situation I got a familiar feeling. Bella was close, I could sense her. I wasn't sure if I was going crazy or if she was really nearby staring at me. I decided to ignore her, but I finally had my determination to get this dent out.

I grabbed the metal with both hands on either side and braced my left leg on the back of the truck, up high. I pulled hard and hoped like hell this would work otherwise I would look like a fool to Bella. I could feel it moving. I shifted my hands closer together and tried again. It moved and I doubled my efforts. The metal gave way and popped out and I was forced backwards by the force and abruptness. I bent my knees trying to remember everything I had learned from playing sports. The moment my bent legs hit the ground I bent forward and reached out towards the ground to keep my balance. I landed and came to a stop. I smiled and stood up, proud of my effort of not falling on my ass or face.

I could still feel Bella, so I dared to look up. I knew I had nothing to lose. I chose the direction where I thought she was and stared into the trees. I couldn't see anything and I couldn't be sure that she was actually there, but it didn't matter. All I was doing was staring at the trees.

I was so focused that I didn't hear Charlie pull up until he honked his horn. I turned to look at him and resisted the urge to flip him off. He was laughing at me and it almost had me reconsidering. I looked back towards the trees, but I could no longer feel Bella, so I gave up.

We made it inside and Charlie began work on dinner. I joined him in the kitchen, sitting at the table.

"So how's school?" Charlie asked and I wanted to laugh. I knew he was only asking because he thought it was expected.

"It's good," I said. "The people are really nice, so that's a bonus."

"Yeah, you tend to get that in small towns. Everyone knows everyone."

Everyone knows everyone? I knew what my next question would be.

"Do you know the Cullen family?" I asked.

"Of course," Charlie answered. "Dr. Cullen's a surgeon at Forks General and we're lucky to have him. He could work at any hospital in the world, but he chooses to work here."

Well that was bizarre.

"Why would he do that?" I asked.

"I don't know," Charlie said. "I always thought it was for his children, that he wanted to raise them in a small town and have time to be there for them, but I don't know. I just know we're lucky to have him. People in this town talk, but not me."

"Well I thought they were fine, a little different, odd perhaps, but I didn't have a problem with them."

"Good," Charlie said. "One of Carlisle's sons works with me and I've never had an issue with him."

"Really?" I asked.

"Yes, he's dating the one with the short hair, Alice I think."

"And he's a police officer?" I asked. "How much older than Alice is he?"

"I don't know, ten years maybe."

"And Doc Cullen sees no problem with that? They're both his children?"

"Yes, by they're not related," Charlie said, sighing. "People are always making assumptions, but Garrett is a great guy and he's waiting until Alice comes of age before he does anything intimate with her."

"Wow, that's noble," I said and Charlie just grunted out his response.

I guess the conversation was officially over, but I had more than enough to think about.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Three**

When I opened my eyes something seemed different. I jumped up and looked out my window and saw a fine layer of snow covering everything, but that wasn't what gained my focus; all the rain from yesterday had frozen solid and created a deadly ice slick on all hard surfaces. It would definitely be something new for me. In Houston snow was a rarity and so was black ice. Today would be an interesting day.

Charlie had already left for work by the time I got downstairs. I liked living with Charlie, he worked long shifts and I was left alone a lot, but I preferred it that way. I had no one to answer to and I could do one of my favorite things, get lost in my thoughts. Lately my thoughts mainly consisted of a brown haired, golden-eyed girl. I smiled at the thought of Bella. I didn't know what it was about her, but I was intrigued by her. I remember her asking why I didn't act like everyone else and I knew I could ask her the exact same question. She was definitely not normal, nor was her family.

I grabbed a quick breakfast before heading out for my truck. I worried about how I would make it to school safely with having to drive on the ice, but I wasn't that worried about it. I managed to make it down the icy driveway without slipping once, okay, so I may have slid across the ice on purpose, but hey, that was just me. You give me a slippery surface and I'm gonna to try and slide on it.

The drive to school was easier than I expected. My truck seemed to have no problem with the black ice. I got out of my truck at school and something caught my eye. I bent down and looked at the front tire. No wonder I made it to school fine, Charlie had gotten up at god knows what time and thoughtfully put chains on my tires. I smiled at the thought. I knew Charlie cared about me, but things like this just cemented it in my mind. We hadn't had the best relationship, but that was mainly due to the distance my mother had put between us. It didn't matter now though because we were finally making up for lost time.

I stood back up and that's when I heard the strangest sound. My head shot up and I looked for the source. It was a high-pitched screech of tires on the ground. My eyes landed on a van heading my way and several things happened simultaneously. I could sense Bella again and my eyes landed on her. She was on the other side of the lot standing with her family and I could swear that she was smirking at me, but I couldn't be sure from this far away. Then I noticed the van again. The tires were locked and I could tell that the driver was doing all that they could, but that didn't stop the van from hurtling towards me. I knew I only had a small amount of time to react, so I reacted.

I dropped down to the ground, onto my stomach, in hopes that I would have enough time to slide underneath my truck for added protection, but when I hit the ground I panicked and froze in fear. The van was almost on top of me and worse the locked front wheel was heading straight for my head. I knew I was mere moments away from dying and I hoped that my life would flash before my eyes or something, but nothing happened. I was actually disappointed. I was about to die and apparently my brain didn't give two fucks. I decided to just give up. What was the point? It was too late for any attempts to save myself to be successful. I had wasted all the time I had.

I could now feel the wind on my nose. I wanted to close my eyes, this was it, and then I felt it. Someone wrapped their hand around my ankle firmly and I was pulled backwards with a speed and force I never would have expected. My chest dragged along the icy, hard ground painfully, but that was the least of my worries. Whoever was dragging me let go and I looked up as the van made contact with my truck. The noise was so loud and sickening; twisted metal, shattered glass. It was then that my brain finally caught up to me and decided to do something, but what it did surprised me. I thought of Bella and that was it. Bella.

I quickly slid myself out from underneath my truck. My chest was on fire and I looked down to see that my shirt was bloody and ripped open. Shit, my scars. Thankfully my jacket was unzipped at the time and therefore still intact. I quickly zipped it up and stood up. I looked over my truck and past the van trying to find Bella in the madness. She was still standing over the other side of the parking lot with her family, but something was off, someone was off. It had only been a short amount of time since I first looked at them and looking at them now and one of them was no longer standing where they once were.

I frowned. That made no sense. I knew Bella and her family were different, but surely they weren't that different. I looked at them closely and Bella almost seemed disappointed. I wondered if she wanted me to die. It would have solved all of her problems. Had someone ran across the lot and saved me? Okay, my brain was definitely foggy. Had I hit my head? I didn't remember it. Maybe whoever pulled me backwards… Maybe my head hit my truck when I was pulled backwards. The pain and fogginess was finally getting the better of me and I sat down on the ground.

The other students finally found their way over to me and someone told me to stay sitting. I couldn't figure out who it was. I replayed the accident over in my mind. I was going to die, but someone grabbed me, I was sure of that. Their hand was ice cold, but I remembered each and every finger wrap around my ankle. It was definitely a person and then they had pulled me back so fast. Someone had saved me, I was sure of that. It had to be one of the Cullens. No one else at this school stood out and if it was a student then they wouldn't have ran. They would have stayed to get hailed as a hero. The Cullens weren't human, they can't be, and they're trying to protect their secret, but why save me? This was all too confusing.

Charlie arrived with the ambulances and I said the most important thing first.

"Don't call Mom," I said, "I'm fine, I swear."

Charlie looked at me and I wasn't sure if he believed me, but he nodded his head.

"I won't call her," he promised.

An EMT looked me over, but I wouldn't allow him to unzip my jacket and because of that I was ordered into the back of the ambulance. Charlie looked at me and I could tell that he didn't understand, but there was no way in hell I was going to unzip my jacket right now for anyone and everyone to see my scars.

The ambulance got a police escort to the hospital, not that it needed it, but I could tell that Charlie was worried for me. They put me in emergency and the nurses came at me, but I shooed them away. I didn't want anyone near me right now. I couldn't explain my scars to them, I just couldn't. Tyler was wheeled in next to me and he had a bandage on his head, it was already soaked with blood.

"Jasper," he said, all frantic. "I'm so sorry. I tried to stop, I did, but I couldn't. I thought I was going to kill you."

I watched as the nurse who used to be mine unwound the bandages from Tyler's head and I could see that his face was littered with small cuts.

"I'm fine, Tyler," I told him. "You on the other hand look horrible, how are you?"

"I'm so sorry. I was going too fast and I hit the ice wrong…" He winced as the nurse began dabbing his cuts.

Yep, I was definitely not showing them my cut up chest, not a chance.

"Don't sweat it, you missed me." I smiled at him.

"How'd you get out of the way so fast? You were there and then you were gone."

"Quick reflexes," I answered. "Fight versus flight. I just needed to get to somewhere safe and I figured the safest place was under my truck and I was right."

"What's going on?" Charlie asked as he came over to me. "Why aren't you being looked at?"

"He won't let me anywhere near him," the nurse said and I wanted to glare at her, but I knew she was only doing her job.

"Jasper," Charlie said. I could tell he was concerned, but he also sounded disappointed. "You need to get checked out. There's blood on your jeans."

I looked down and he was right, great.

"I don't want anyone to touch me," I said firmly.

"Why?" Charlie asked.

"Because I don't want to." I folded my arms across my chest and turned from Charlie.

He caught the seriousness and sat down on the bed next to me.

"Jasper, you need someone to look at you, you're bleeding."

I looked up at him and I knew he was right, but I didn't want to do this, not here, not now. I suddenly remembered something Charlie had told me last night...

"I will only be seen by Dr. Cullen," I said and I heard Charlie breathe out a sigh of relief. "Privately," I added.

"Okay," Charlie said, finally happy that I was co-operating.

"I'll page him," the nurse said and she didn't seem too happy at all.

"Jasper," Charlie said, turning to face me.

"Not now," I told him. "Maybe later, but not now please."

He nodded his head in acceptance.

"I'm going to go get some coffee, message me when you're done."

I nodded my head and watched him leave. I contemplated doing the same thing, but the nurse was glaring daggers, just daring me, so I decided it wasn't worth it.

Dr. Cullen finally made his grand entrance and I could tell who he was instantly, his gold eyes stared straight at me. Yep, there was definitely something supernatural about this family, you don't meet six people, not related, all with gold eyes. Plus Dr. Cullen, gifted surgeon, looked young, mid to late twenties, maybe, but I was being generous with that. Was this whole town stupid or did they simply not even bother to question the Doctor and his odd family.

"So, Jasper Whitlock," he said and I noticed that his voice was like velvet. I wasn't gay, but maybe I'd give it a go for the Doc, he was fucking hot. Blondes weren't my thing, but… Never say never. Dr. Cullen cleared his throat. What? He couldn't feel my lust. "So you requested me specifically?" he asked. "Vicky said you wouldn't let her touch you. Why? And how did you know to ask for me?"

So many questions, I guess I now know where Bella gets it from.

"Umm," I said, "can we talk in private?"

He looked at me closely before accepting.

"Why, of course," he said.

I stood up and followed him to his office. It was a bigger office than I expected for a small town doc.

"So what seems to be the problem?" he asked, his back to me.

I didn't hesitate. I knew there was no way out of this. I unzipped my jacket and I saw him tense. What did he think I was doing? I ignored him and pulled off my ripped bloody t-shirt and undershirt next. It stung and I looked down at my chest. I had some bad gravel rash. It reminded me of the time I came off my bike and got some on my hip, it looked exactly the same and hurt about the same too. It confused me at first, but then I remembered the speed and force my savior had used.

Dr. Cullen turned around and I could feel his shock. Not only was he seeing the gravel rash, but he was undoubtedly seeing my scars too; cuts, burns, bites. He opened his mouth, but I spoke first.

"Now you know why I wouldn't let anyone touch me and why I wouldn't allow this to happen in front of Charlie. My dad doesn't know about this and I would like to keep it that way."

"O-kay," Dr. Cullen stammered and it seemed so out of character for him. "Can you tell me what happened?" he asked taking a step towards me.

"Sure," I said and I could feel his surprise, he was mistaken by my intentions. I smirked. "One of your children," I said putting emphasis on the word children, "decided to help save me and they pulled me back too fast, hence the severe gravel rash." He was shocked again.

"Isabella?" he questioned and I shook my head.

"No," I said laughing, "she wanted me to die."

"Then who?" he asked and I took note of the fact that he wasn't questioning anything I said, he was just accepting it.

"Rose," I answered and once again there was shock.

Dr. Cullen's face twisted in confusion.

"Rosalie?" he asked. "And you're sure?"

I brought back the memory of the Cullens across the parking lot. They were all standing where they had been except one, Rose. She had been standing behind everyone on Emmett's left side, but after I had been saved she was on his right side. I wouldn't have even picked up on it except that it happened so quickly and I distinctly remembered seeing her standing directly behind Bella.

"I'm sure," I said, "but don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

"Tell anyone what?" Dr. Cullen asked.

"I know you have a secret, Doc," I said, "but until I figure it out you can expect me to stay quiet."

"And once you figure it out?" he asked.

He was now scared and rightly so. Whatever this was concerned his family and I knew just how important that was.

"Tell you what," I said. "I'll tell you the secret behind my scars and you keep it to yourself, and once I find out your secret I will do that same. I will keep it to myself."

Dr. Cullen looked at me. I could tell he was trying to figure it all out, but in the end his curiosity won out and he made the deal.

"So what happened to you?" he asked. "I've seen something similar before, but nothing to this extent and not on a human."

I guess now he was just going for broke, he was not human, I knew that for a fact now.

"Well," I said dramatically, "my first mistake was falling in love with a woman." Carlisle nodded at me knowingly before going to grab some supplies to treat my road rash. "She was beautiful, strong, smart, but her most endearing quality was that she wanted me. I was only a scrawny little thing when we met and she knew that, that's why she picked me. She knew I would be easy to manipulate and I was. I submitted to her fully, but as I grew with her I began changing. I became more dominant and she didn't like that. She didn't like that at all.

"She punished me in every way that she could, but I had tasted her life. I had tasted what it was like to be in charge, so no matter what I always screwed up and because of that I was punished. She always thought that the method she was using was wrong, so she tried everything. Cutting me, bruising me, burning me, biting me, but it was all pointless. I grew to expect the pain, to love the pain. It was pleasurable. She worked out my game eventually and let me go. She found someone else who would submit to her and not fight back. And slowly, the more she got away from me, the less pain I received on a daily basis, the more I started to realize just how fucked up the situation was."

"How long ago was this?" Dr. Cullen asked.

"Almost a year."

"And you're doing okay emotionally? I can see physically that your wounds have healed the best that they could with no treatment. What about mentally?"

"Whoa, hold it, Doc," I said, "I'll tell you the same thing I told your daughter, you don't need to know my life story. I've told you enough, more than you deserve. I doubt your secret is as juicy as my story, so don't be greedy and just take what you're given."

He didn't like that I was telling him off and I watched as he over-filled the cotton wad with the saline solution until it was dripping wet before he applied it to my wound. It stung and I hissed out in pain, once it settled down I smiled. Oh, that felt good. I opened my eyes and looked up at the doc, he looked unsettled.

"Don't worry," I told him, "I'm not about to fall off the wagon. I know all about the difference between good pain and bad pain, trust me."

He still seemed unsure, but he continued on with his job, and I laughed.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Four**

I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I hardly got any sleep as I dreamed of Bella Cullen and it had me rattled. I felt connected to her, I did, and I thought she was feeling the same thing, but one thought wouldn't leave me alone and that was her actions in the parking lot yesterday. She didn't rush to save me, she just stood there and she almost looked pleased. I knew there was more to this story and I vowed to figure it out one way or another. Back to my dreams, they were all about Bella, but this time she wasn't just standing there, she was the one saving me. Many times, different scenarios, she didn't hesitate, she jumped into action and she saved me. She was fast, cunning and beautiful, but my dreams only made the reality more depressing because she didn't save me, Rose did. But why?

School was tense at first. Everyone was fussing over me and although I did enjoy it to a degree, I found I just wanted answers, but the mass of students constantly surrounding me kept me from my goal. I knew I would find a way though. Jessica and Lauren were the worst, they were literally hanging off me, fussing over me. I actually ran and hid in the nurse's office complaining that my chest was sore. It wasn't me best move as the nurse unwrapped the bandages from my chest and looked at all my wounds. I had turned my head from her, I didn't want to see what I could already feel from her, pity, disgust, sorrow. I did get my reprieve though. Tyler, thankfully, we still not back at school. I can only imagine how much he would apologize seeing how bad he was in the hospital. I didn't want to hear it. It wasn't his fault and I didn't die… _But you could have_… I shook my head to rid the thoughts. I couldn't be thinking about Bella right now.

Everyone was calling me a hero, they were saying that I was fast for getting out of the way so quickly, they were admiring me. I wasn't disagreeing, their hero worship was fun to experience. I liked that they looked up to me. I looked around the lunch table and everyone was staring at me with pride, happiness and amazement. It was a good feeling. I had always been an outsider. I was always small and scrawny and going to the same school with the same people most of my life, well, that's all they knew me as, even after I grew several feet and gained some muscle mass, they still couldn't look past who I was. So I was definitely enjoying this. I was currently recounting the story for the millionth time. I kept Rose's part out of it, I just told everyone that I reacted quickly and slid straight underneath my truck and they didn't question it, but now I was. The more I analyzed it the more I realized that everything must have happened in a couple of seconds, if that, so Rose would have made a split decision to save me, but why?

My story came to an end and I turned to look at the Cullen table. They were all looking at me except Bella. I wondered if they knew about Rose's part in all this. I stood up and made my way over to them. I was a man of action and I was taking action. They all watched me, it was a little intimidating, but I pushed it off and puffed out my chest. I wouldn't let them know that they affected me negatively. Bella still didn't look up, but I didn't care.

"I need to talk to you," I said and Bella finally looked up, glaring at me. "Not you," I told her sweetly and I swear she growled. "Rose, I need to talk to you."

Rose and I shared a look and I could feel that she was warning me. I decided to keep my mouth shut and say no more. Rose knew my intentions so it was now up to her. I walked out of the cafeteria, but I wasn't sure if she was following me. I kept on walking. I knew for a fact that Rose had super speed and most likely strength, so I wondered what else was super and if her family shared the same gifts. Either way if they had super hearing I didn't want them to be a part of this conversation. Once I hit the woods, I turned to see Rose following me. I smiled and kept on going. Once I was certain I was far enough away from the school I stopped and turned to face her. She looked at me closely and I could tell that she was guarded, yet curious.

"Do the others know that you saved me?" I asked and she was shocked. I did like surprising people.

"No," she said, folding her arms across her chest.

"Carlisle knows," I told her, "it was unavoidable. I don't know your family or what him knowing means, but you deserve to know that he knows."

"Thank you."

She was being very tightlipped. I needed to change that.

"Why did you save me?" I asked.

I knew she would answer me honestly. That was just Rose I had noticed, she was very straightforward and didn't waste any time. I smiled at that. I liked her. Rose couldn't understand my smile so I dropped it.

"I saved you for Isabella," she answered.

"But Bella didn't want to save me," I said and Rose nodded her head in acceptance.

"Isabella doesn't know what she wants," she said and I could feel some remorse and anger from her, "she hasn't known for a long time now."

"So why did you save me for Bella then?"

"Because I've been with her for a long time now, too long." She looked down at the ground. "Isabella was adopted before me and because of that I looked up to her as an older sister. She was misled early in life and because of that she is fucked up. She's constantly battling with herself, but ever since she's met you she's been more focused. She talks more. She even smiled the other day." I watched as Rose smiled at the memory. "I've heard Edward and Carlisle talk about how she was before, when she was…"

"Human," I supplied when she didn't. Rose looked like she was about to run. "Relax," I told her, "I will tell you the same thing I told Carlisle, I know you're not human, none of your family are. I'm still working out what you are, but I will keep it a secret."

"You don't want to know," Rose said seriously, I brushed her off.

"Please continue," I said.

"When she was human she wasn't like this… She was… happy." Well that was overly broad, but it spoke volumes. Bella was no longer happy and she hadn't been for a long time. "She's changed since meeting you, not a lot, but she has, I've seen it. I've always tried to look out for her so when I saw that you were about to die or at least get seriously injured I knew that I must do everything I could to save you because no matter what this is between you and her I need you to keep on doing what you're doing because she is changing and it's all because of you."

Well that was heavy, but I needed more information.

"Why is she damaged?" I asked and I watched as Rose's anger rose.

"I don't want to discuss that with you," she said tightly.

"Rose, I need to know," I pressed. I wanted her to trust me, I needed her to trust me.

She looked at me closely and I could tell that she was thinking about it. If only she trusted me this would be simple.

"Okay," she said, "but you can't repeat this to anyone and you cannot let Isabella know that you know and if she ever tells you herself then you need to react accordingly."

I nodded my head, but that wasn't enough for Rose.

"I promise and my word is my bond," I told her.

She nodded her head and I knew that I had her trust.

"Carlisle changed Edward because they were mated, but neither of them wanted to accept it… Maybe if they had I wouldn't be here right now." I looked at her confused, but she didn't even acknowledge it. I decided to just shut up and focus on everything she said, word for word, until I could figure it out later. "Maybe I would have gotten my own life, married someone, had kids… Maybe I would have met Emmett as a human… Though I guess Royce ultimately fucked all that up." She breathed out, her anger returning, but this was a different kind of anger. This was personal, revengeful. "I was lucky. I found my mate not long after I joined the Cullens, but not Bella. She's still waiting."

I looked at Rose as she took a pause to calm down. She cared for Bella deeply, I could see that.

"There was a time where Isabella thought she was Edward's mate. She's strong, she is, but no one can survive that much emotional pain and just come out the other side as they were. When Carlisle and Edward finally accepted each other, Isabella closed up, she protected herself first and she started to care less. She was already long gone by the time I met her, but even after we met she started slipping further and further away. Isabella's more understanding and compassionate than me, I'm a vengeful person by nature and I brought that across with me. It's one of my defining traits. But that's not Isabella and that's why her and Edward are thick as thieves now. She loved him, she really did and although they're not mated she still loves him. I don't know how I feel about that… but now here you are and she just responds to you and what you do like nothing I've ever seen. So keep on doing what you're doing."

"But I'm not doing anything," I said.

"Then keep on doing nothing. I don't care, but let me tell you right now if you crush her heart I will hunt you down and make you pay."

I let out a laugh at that one. I didn't care what she was, she didn't scare me. Rose glared at me and I wisely stopped.

"Why doesn't she allow anyone to call her Bella?" I asked next.

"Because that's what Edward called her when she was in love with him," Rose said.

"So I should stop?" I asked.

"No, don't. She loves that name, it's Isabella she hates. She uses it so no one can get close to her. When we call her Isabella it's easily brushed off, but when you call her Bella it reignites something inside her, it makes her remember who she once was before all this happened. You can't give up, she deserves her happiness."

"And if I'm not it?" I asked. "I'm not like you, I'm human, I can't be mated to her."

"It doesn't matter, it's working for now and that's all I care about. It's been way too long and I want my sister back, the sister she was always meant to be."

Rose turned from me.

"Thank you," I said and she turned back to face me. "Thank you for saving me so that I can save Bella."

Rose smiled at me and it was so beautiful, but it looked misplaced.

Rose ran from me faster than I could register and I began the long walk back to the school.

The moment I entered the cafeteria my eyes went straight for Edward, he was sitting next to Bella and he appeared to be laughing. I could sense Bella's amusement and love, but it seemed like more of a brotherly love and not a mate love… Mate love, whatever that meant.

I didn't have the full story, only Rose's, but I could understand why people fought their attraction to others, especially of the same sex. My best friend from back home, Peter, was gay, but his parents were dead set Christians and they wouldn't have any part of it. They made him try everything to get the gay out of him, but it didn't work, of course. It got to a point where even Peter felt wrong for feeling what he did, so he just played the part to please his parents and God. I had tried to tell him otherwise, he always knew that I accepted him no matter what, but it was never enough. When I left he was living a lie, he had a girlfriend named Charlotte and everything. He was a people pleaser. I tried one more time before I left, but Peter just clapped me on the shoulder and said, 'this is my life now, Jasper'. It was so heartbreaking to see him living a lie and I was so glad I was temporarily away from him and his deceit as it was starting to take a toll on me.

I was interested to know what finally made Carlisle and Edward realize and accept their relationship because it must have been monumental. I understood that neither Carlisle nor Edward would have wanted to be the first one to give in, so the other one would have constantly felt unwanted, unloved, and it just became a vicious circle. Edward looked up at me and he seemed curious. I could imagine Carlisle with him. Carlisle was fucking hot. I relived the memory from when I met him yesterday, all my thoughts about him and then when he was tending to my wounds. It was a fucking Florence Nightingale situation or some shit, what do they call it when you fall for your caretaker? Well I hadn't actually fallen for him, but I might have if he wasn't taken by Edward or if I didn't care about Bella as much as I do. I watched as Edward got more and more agitated as time went on until he jumped up and hurriedly left the cafeteria. What was that all about? It's not like he could hear my impure thoughts about Carlisle, that was impossible… Perhaps.

I looked away from the Cullens and sat down at my table.

"What was that all about?" Mike asked me. "Did Rosalie ask you to the girls' choice spring dance?"

"The what?" I asked him confused.

"There's an upcoming dance, but the it's girls' choice," Eric said.

"Oh, well then no."

"Umm," Lauren said, "would you go with me Jasper?"

"No," Jessica quickly said. "Go with me Jasper?"

I looked at Angela, she was the only female here who hadn't asked me. She looked back at me and I could tell she was embarrassed. She wanted to ask me to the dance and out of everyone here I would have accepted her invitation, but she never asked. Angela was a nice girl, I made a mental note to talk to her soon and help give her the confidence to ask Ben as I knew she liked him.

"Jasper," Mike hissed at me. "You're leaving them hanging. What are you doing?"

I snapped out of my thoughts and focused back on Lauren and Jessica, they both seemed so hopeful and I was afraid that if I turned them down now I would start a catfight.

"I have a feeling I'm in Seattle that day," I said.

"Do you even know what day it is?" Eric asked and I elbowed him in the ribs.

"Yes, of course," I lied.

"What about Isabella?" Mike asked. "She's watching you again. Do you think she'll ask you and if she does will you not be going to Seattle?"

I looked up at Bella and she was indeed looking at me. I looked at her closely. She seemed to be watching me intently, waiting for me to respond. I tried to figure out what she was feeling, but I wasn't getting anything off her and that was a first. I remembered everything Rose had told me about how Bella had been played with before and I knew I didn't want to do that.

"I told you," I said firmly, "I have plans in Seattle, so no. I doubt Bella would be into dancing anyway."

I got a flash of something off Bella, but I couldn't comprehend what it was. I turned back to my table and I was thankful to see that Lauren and Jessica had calmed down, they almost seemed satisfied. I guess I would have to go to Seattle now otherwise I'd have two unhappy girls on my hands and I knew I didn't want that.

Lunch ended and so did my next class. I walked into gym and I was forced straight onto the bleachers, doctor's orders. No physical activity until my chest healed or at least scabbed over. I wasn't too fussed until I found out that everyone was playing basketball today. Bella walked into the gym and she tried to come over to me, but the teacher stopped her and made her play. I didn't mind because I got to watch her. I could tell she was holding back and pretending to be bad, but it didn't matter because for the whole class my eyes never left her.

Class ended and I headed straight for the parking lot whilst everyone else had a shower. I walked over to the accident site and just stood there looking at the black skid marks, the broken shards of glass. The memory flashed by in my mind. I had been so lucky, my truck on the other hand, it was dead… Well it wasn't technically dead. Charlie was getting Billy Black's son to look at it or something, but it was well and truly dented, I guess having a run in with a van does that to you. Charlie drove me to school, but he was working so I told him I'd find my way home.

"What are you thinking about?" Bella asked me and I tore my eyes off the ground and looked at her.

"Many things," I answered honestly.

I was surprised she was talking to me civilly today. Maybe nearly watching me get crushed by a van had changed her some. I knew it had changed me a little.

"Are you really going to Seattle the day of the dance?" she asked me.

"No," I answered, "but I now suspect that I'll have to."

"Why lie?"

"It's Jessica and Lauren," I said, "they're not my type. I need to be challenged, I want someone I can talk with, argue with… I don't want someone who just rolls over… I don't know."

"Okay, and how are you getting to Seattle? Your truck is dead."

My truck is dead…

"Were you just talking to Edward?" I asked and she was confused. "He can read minds can't he?"

"How do you know that?" Bella asked. "Do you know what I am?"

"No, I don't," I said, "and I only know that Edward is a mind reader because I'm observant and he is terrible at hiding his reactions especially when it comes to his mate."

"His mate?" Bella questioned and I wondered what her game was here.

"Yeah, the doctor," I said. "They make a good pair, don't you think?"

I watched her closely as she shifted nervously.

"Yeah, I think so," she mumbled, "they're happy and in love and I guess that's all that matters."

"It is," I agreed, "for them that's all that matters."

"So Seattle?" she asked me.

"Bella," I sighed, "can't you just get to your point?"

"Well seeing as you have no car I could drive you, if you want… I could also… drive you home maybe." She was nervous.

I looked at her closely, but kept my face blank. Rose had told me that Bella had closed herself off, that she had distanced herself from others, but then here she was extending me an olive branch. I would take it, not only for her and Rose, but for me.

"Sure," I said, "that would be good."

"Okay." She smiled and it was so pure and innocent and so unlike her, but maybe it was just the old her shining back through. I wasn't sure just yet.

I followed her and she stopped in front of a bike, a Harley Davidson Iron 883 to be specific, in matt black. Fuck that was hot and sleek and I wanted it.

"Do you like it?" Bella asked me, still smiling.

"I fucking love it," I told her as I stepped up to it and ran my fingers gingerly over the leather seat. Fuck.

"I can tell," she said. "Here." She handed me a helmet and I watched as she straddled the bike and started it up.

"No helmet for you?" I asked.

She shook her head. "I don't need it."

I knew she probably didn't need one, but it made me uneasy to see her riding without one.

"Can I be the one in charge?" I asked and she smirked at me.

"No," she said. "Now put that helmet on, I can't have you messing up that beautiful mind of yours when we undoubtedly crash and you bounce across the road."

Well that was a lovely visual. I pulled the helmet on.

"Just how much of my thoughts has Edward heard?" I asked, securing the helmet.

"All of them," Bella answered.

"And exactly how many of them has he told you?" I asked as I got on the bike behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist.

"All of them," she answered.

Fuck, I was so screwed and so in over my head.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me a review, you guys are awesome

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Five**

Charlie had driven me to school in his police cruiser, I didn't mind, but I would much rather be on the back of Bella's Harley with my legs wrapped tightly around hers. It was heaven riding with her last night and I hoped we could repeat it today. I walked into the cafeteria and my eyes went straight for the Cullen table. Four pairs of eyes stared back at me, but Bella was nowhere to be seen. I frowned. I wondered where she was. Jessica was still babbling so I brushed off my disappointment and turned my attention back to her. She was talking about the upcoming beach trip, that seemed to be all anyone could discuss right now and although I was going I would much rather talk about Bella.

We made it through the line and I sat down next to Mike.

"Isabella Cullen's staring at you again," Mike said. "I wonder why she's sitting alone today."

I followed Mike's gaze and saw Bella smirking at me from an empty table across the other side of the cafeteria. Once our eyes met she raised her hand and motioned for me to come over to her. What was she up to today?

"Are you going to go over to her?" Mike asked me.

"Of course," I replied, standing up and grabbing my tray. This wasn't an opportunity to be wasted.

Mike laughed, but I could sense his jealousy and slight hatred towards me. I couldn't help it if Bella liked me and not him. She did make him pee his pants so that must stand for something in their relationship. I let out a laugh at that thought and my eyes snapped up to look at Edward to see if he had heard me or not. He was looking right at me and he was smiling, he was definitely feeling amused. I wondered what it would be like to be a mind reader. I could already gauge how people were feeling fairly well, but there was a lot of guess work which I didn't mind. Knowing exactly what they were thinking must be a trip, but also a burden. I think I'd rather stick with my method. Edward was still smiling at me. He nodded his head once before motioning to Bella next. Bella right, there were too many distractions going on and too much thinking.

I left Mike and a sulking Jessica and Lauren behind me.

When I reached Bella's table I sat down right next to her. The whole table was free and I knew it would have been more beneficial to sit across from her, but I wanted to be near her, I wanted to be able to touch her if need be. I wouldn't be denied. I got a shot of amusement from across the cafeteria and I looked up into Edward's eyes again. I didn't know how I felt about him constantly reading my mind, but I decided not to dwell on it. Surely if he's been a mind reader for a long time then he would understand privacy and that some of my thoughts, _I thought of Maria_, were private and shouldn't be discussed with anyone as they were my story to tell. Edward nodded his head and I could feel his acceptance. I knew I could trust him on this.

"Don't tell me that you've got a hard on for Edward as well as Carlisle," Bella said.

I shifted to face her better, my knee knocked into her thigh, but I didn't move it. I cocked my eyebrow at her.

"No," I answered. "My lust is only for Carlisle. Edward and I, we just, understand each other."

"But you would go after Carlisle if it was offered to you?" she asked and I could sense that she was feeling insecure about herself. I guess she had already lost Edward to Carlisle and didn't want to lose me too. I would have to ask her about it.

"No, Bella, I'm straight. I can just appreciate beauty when I see it."

Her insecurities floated away. I could tell they were still there, but they weren't crushing her anymore.

"So this is new," I said, motioning towards the table. "Is your family annoying you?"

"No… Not today at least," she said and I loved how open she was being.

Something was definitely shifting in her, but what?

"I decided that the past is in the past and that it doesn't need to dictate the future," she said.

Yes, she had definitely been making some decisions and I was glad that she had.

"I think your friends are upset with me for stealing you," she said.

I didn't even bother to look up at Mike, Jessica, Lauren and the others as I had no doubt that their eyes were all glued to Bella and me.

"Who cares about them," I said simply.

"And if I never give you back?" she said with a wicked glint in her eyes.

"Don't tease me, Bella, unless you plan to follow through of course," I said.

"How are you still not afraid of me? I don't understand it."

"Bella, my life has not been easy, I've witnessed pure evil before and you and you're family are not it."

"What does that mean?" she asked. "What have you seen? You know we're not human but you don't seem to care, why is that?"

"I'm a very simple man, Bella, I make my decisions and judgments on what I see, how I feel, how others act and react. You have given me no reason to be afraid, so it would be silly of me to act afraid."

She scrunched up her face, it was cute. Another shot of amusement from Edward, I didn't look up at him this time. I found it odd that I could sense him from this far away. I knew I could do it with Bella, but I thought that was just because of her.

"Do you know what I am yet?" she asked and she seemed nervous.

"No."

"Have you even tried?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Why would I, Bella? Everyone's been warning me that what I find won't be good, so why dig it up? I'm a very open-minded person so I doubt whatever you are will affect me negatively, but sometimes it's just better to leave things alone. I'll find out one day, I'm sure of that, but for now I'm happy just being in the dark."

She seemed surprised.

"Do you have any theories at all?" she asked, her nervousness coming back. She really did seem afraid that when I finally figured out her secret I would run. Surely it couldn't be that bad.

"I don't know," I said, grabbing my food and eating it as a distraction. "I know you're not human," I said between bites, "and because I've been warned I can rule out everything in the superhero category. I'm thinking something supernatural, but that could mean anything, witches, vampires, urban legends, werewolves… There's just too many to decide."

"And what if I told you…" she trailed off, she was nervous again and I saw her look at her family. I followed her gaze and everyone was looking at us. Rose and Edward seemed fine, but Emmett and Alice were unsure. Bella must have decided because she turned back to me. "…one of your answers was right."

Witches, vampires, urban legends, werewolves? I quickly dismissed witches because they wouldn't necessarily be fast or strong. I wanted to dismiss urban legends too as they were usually singular and this was a whole group of either vampires or werewolves. They didn't look like werewolves, but what did I know. I had narrowed it down to two and I was happy with that for now.

"So?" Bella questioned when I was silent for too long.

"Vampire or werewolf," I settled on, "one of them, but I'm not making my final decision today."

"Okay," she accepted and she seemed relieved.

We spent the rest of lunch in a comfortable silence and it was nice. Bella seemed to be calming down in my presence and accepting whatever it was growing between the two of us. It was just pleasant. Bella walked me to my next class and I asked her why she bothered.

"I'm not going to biology," she answered, "they're blood typing and I don't like the smell of blood."

Hmm, werewolf perhaps. You couldn't have a vampire who had an aversion to blood could you? Or was it simply a red herring?

"So you're skipping?" I asked.

"Yeah, it's healthy to ditch every now and then, you should ditch with me."

I let out a laugh.

"Although that's tempting, I have a feeling my dad would kill me. One of his rules was about school and me attending and doing my best. So thank you for the offer, but no. Will you be in Gym or are you skipping the rest of the day?" I asked.

She looked at me closely and I couldn't get a read off her again. That was the second time it had happened. It was so unusual to feel nothing.

"I'll be there," she said, "for you. Plus someone needs to give you a ride home."

I smiled at that. She was giving me everything I wanted.

"I will see you in Gym then." I smiled at her and stepped into the classroom.

Class passed and I spent every single second thinking about Bella and weighing up the pros and cons of her being a vampire or a werewolf and they were fairly evenly matched. Werewolf would probably be better as you'd only change during the full moon, but that didn't explain whether or not you would have your super abilities for the rest of the month. And what about the daylight if she was a vampire? Hmm, I kept on going back and forth between the two as neither of them made complete sense.

I entered the gymnasium and I knew I wasn't about to sit on the bleachers all alone again, so I charmed Coach Clapp into letting me play basketball. Bella almost seemed as happy with this as I was. Bella and I were on different teams and I made sure she was my opponent and what do you know, Bella was not as clumsy today and she was definitely trying to beat me. I spent a lot of the time laughing at her newly gained skills, her dedication, and Coach Clapp's praise, because in the end I was still a better player than Bella with her supernatural abilities and all. I laughed out loud again and Bella didn't like that. The ball came my way but Bella jumped in front of me and snatched it, pushing me backwards onto the floor whilst she was at it. I quickly stood up and we continued on with the game.

Bella started to not breathe, at least I think she wasn't breathing, it was an odd situation, but she was no longer panting in exertion. It was soon explained.

"Oh, gross," Mike said, stopping ball in hand, looking at me. "Jasper, you're bleeding."

I looked down as Coach Clapp blew her whistle and I was bleeding. I guess Bella had ripped open one of my scabs or something. It was too gross to think about. Blood, I quickly remembered, Bella hated blood, vampires loved blood. I looked at her and she seemed distressed, but not murderous. Hmm, another added layer that didn't help me in the slightest. She could be trying not to eat me or she could simply not like blood.

"Jasper, nurse's office right now," Coach Clapp said. "Someone please take him."

"I'll take him," Jessica said, coming up to my side.

"Back off," Bella hissed and I noticed that her bright golden eyes were darker than they were at lunch. Odd.

Jessica looked hurt, but Bella didn't apologize.

"Bella, can take him," Coach Clapp said and I was thankful for that.

"Thank you for the offer, Jess," I told her sincerely, smiling at her. She smiled back and all was right in her world again.

"Do you like Jessica?" Bella asked when we were outside the gym.

"No," I answered. My chest stung a little, but the pain wasn't too bad, I'd definitely had worse.

"Good," she said. "Let me take you to the nurse's office."

"No," I said firmly, stopping. "I'm not going back there and definitely not with you."

She was confused.

"Jasper, you're bleeding."

"So?"

"It smells coppery and disgusting, can't you smell it?" she asked.

"Well now that you mention it, but it doesn't bother me. Does it bother you because you're a vampire?"

She got a serious look in her eye, but she didn't answer me.

"I'm sorry for not saving you," Bella said when we started walking again. I led her towards the parking lot. I just wanted to get out of here with her.

"It's okay," I said. "I've got quick reflexes, so yeah."

"I know Rose saved you, she told me, and that's the reason you're bleeding right now. Rose doesn't think things through like I would have."

"Oh, well it doesn't matter. It's just a few scrapes, Bella, I'm alive and that's what counts. Why didn't you save me?" I asked, hoping she would answer.

"I like you, Jasper, I don't know why, I still don't, and I didn't want you to leave me like he did."

"Edward?" I asked carefully. "You two dated?"

"Didn't Rose tell you? I told her to tell you everything." Bella seemed upset.

"We did talk, but Rose spent a lot of the time telling me about her and how it affected her life and not about you. I could tell she was leaving out huge chunks, but I didn't question her on it because it wasn't my place. I have a theory if you want to hear it." Bella nodded her head. "You and your family are not human and don't seem to interact with humans, apart from Carlisle at the hospital and I suspect Garrett at the police station, so you don't know how to talk to humans. I've noticed this with you as well. You communicate on a higher level, but us humans need details and explanations. Sure Rose is self-involved and that explains why she talked about herself so much, but she also assumed that I could read in between the lines when I couldn't. So I know bits and pieces, but I definitely don't know the whole story and I'd rather hear it from you anyway."

"That makes sense," Bella said. "How can you understand everything so well?"

"I've trained myself, Bella. I had to. I needed to be ahead of everything and everyone. I needed to understand how they were feeling and not just rely on what they were saying. It's like chess, you need to be at least three moves ahead at all times, if not more, and that's what I do."

"Why are you like this?" she asked me.

"I'm not sure I'm ready to tell you yet," I said and I could tell that she was about to protest. "It's like with your secret, you're so sure that the moment I find out I will run from you, and I feel the same way about my story. So for now, let's just forget it. I will tell you eventually, I suspect, but it doesn't need to be right now."

I could feel her understanding.

"You really should tend to your wounds," Bella said, looking down at my blood soaked shirt.

It was fine and I was certain that it had stopped bleeding.

"I will look at it when I'm home," I told her and she didn't seem too happy with that.

She didn't like that I was hurt it seemed and that was a huge turnaround from two days ago when she abandoned me to get hit by Tyler's van. I smiled. She cared about me.

"Do you want me to take you home now?" she asked, but it was more of a demand.

"Sure," I said, anything to get Bella in between my legs again. "So are you going to the beach this Saturday?" I asked. "It seems like everyone's going, but then again you don't seem like a joiner."

"No," she answered seriously. "I don't want to be near you when you find out."

Find out what?

"Your secret?" I asked and she nodded her head.

"Let's just say that you have two options and I can only be one of them," Bella said, "but the other one exists too." Well that was confusing. "You'll figure it out soon enough if you're smart and I already know that you are."

She thought I was smart… Yep, that went straight to my head and I didn't even care.

Bella stopped and I full on pouted. We were not standing in front of her Harley, but in front of a black Shelby Mustang. I liked the car, I really did, but I liked Bella and having no space in between us more. Bella caught my pout and laughed.

"Where's your bike?" I asked, crossing my arms. I wasn't getting into her car until I had some answers.

"At home," she said and I didn't move. That wasn't good enough in my book. "Jasper, yesterday was good, but I couldn't focus on the road. All I could focus on and feel was lust and it definitely wasn't coming from me. It was distracting and I don't want to crash with you because there's a chance you wouldn't survive. Just get in the car."

I watched as Bella got into the car and I thought about what she said. She could feel my lust? Not possible. Sure I was feeling a lot of lust during our ride, but there was no way she would have been able to feel it as well. I was not the supernatural being here, she was. I gave in and got in her Mustang and she smiled at me. I glared at her, lust or no lust, I wasn't happy with this new development.

Bella turned on her CD player and The Clash filled the car.

"Guns of Brixton?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah, you know The Clash?" Bella asked, pulling out of the parking lot.

"Of course, _He, who fucks nuns, will later join the church. Death or glory becomes just another story_," I quoted, well I technically sung the lyrics. Bella seemed impressed.

"Oh, so you're a true fan then, not just a pretender?" She was impressed.

"Of course," I answered. "You'll soon come to learn that there's nothing fake about me. I'm straightforward and honest and I never pretend to be anything I'm not."

Bella didn't answer me, so I decided to sing my words and feelings towards her. I reached for her CD player and skipped to the song I wanted, _Should I Stay or Should I Go_, and started singing it.

"_Darling, you gotta let me know - Should I stay or should I go? - If you say that you are mine - I'll be here till the end of time - So you gotta let me know - Should I stay or should I go? – It's always tease, tease, tease - You're happy when I'm on my knees - One day is fine and the next is black - So if you want me off your back - Well, come on and let me know - Should I stay or should I go?_" The chorus came and the song sped up, so I lost some of my seriousness. "_Should I stay or should I go now? - Should I stay or should I go now? - If I go there will be trouble - And if I stay it will be double - So come on and let me know_." The chorus ended and the song slowed back down, so I brought back my seriousness. "_This indecision's bugging me - If you don't want me set me free - Exactly who I'm supposed to be - Don't you know which clothes even fit me? - Come on and let me know_." She reached out and stopped the song, but I sang the last line anyway. "_Should I cool it or should I blow?_"

"You're not playing fair," she said, pulling up to my house.

"I never do," I admitted. Ever since Maria had wronged me I didn't see the point. "Are you ever going to tell me about you and Edward?"

She seemed surprised that I remembered. We had gotten so fair off topic, but I was determined to find out.

"There's not much to tell," she said. "I was changed about a year after he was, so we were both newborns, struggling with our new life and our emotions. Carlisle pushed us together and as we were going through the same stages we bonded, we fell in love. We dated for… a long time, too long. Edward was confused and I wanted someone to hold on to, someone to love, we were just there for each other… until he and Carlisle accepted that they were mates. When that happened I was just pushed to the side. I became the third wheel to two relationships and it sucked. I was hurting, but no one seemed to care, they were all blissfully unaware. I wanted to run away and live my own life, but I could never leave my family. I couldn't leave Edward."

"What happened?" I asked and she seemed scared for my next question, so I surprised her. "How did Edward and Carlisle finally accept that they were mate?"

She was confused by my tactic, but it was the one question I wanted answered most.

"They were out hunting and… they ran into an army of our kind, they were attacked. Carlisle lost his head. I remember Edward coming back with Carlisle's head in one hand and his body slung over his shoulder and Edward looked so devastated. I just knew that was it. I helped him fuse Carlisle head back on and it killed me inside. I think deep down I knew they were mated, but I never allowed myself to believe it. I loved Edward, I really did and I wanted him all to myself. It was the most selfish thing I've even done, but he wasn't innocent in this either. Edward was living a lie, Carlisle too. It's just a fucked up situation. Did Rose tell you any of this?"

"Some of it," I said and Bella growled in frustration. Another tick for the werewolf column. "She told me that you still love Edward, but I suspect that it's more as a brother and nothing else."

"You're right," she said. "Until recently I thought I was in love with him, but it's different."

"Different from what?" I asked. "Different from how you feel about me?"

Bella glared at me and didn't answer, ooh touchy.

"So were you all changed by Carlisle?" I asked.

"No," Bella said. "Alice found us with her mate Garrett and we gave them refuge. That army I mentioned before, Garrett used to fight in one of them, so he needs a little extra support than the rest of us."

"Doesn't he work with Charlie at the police station?" I asked.

"Yes, he needs to keep his mind active, plus he's too old to go to school with the rest of us."

"Why do you even go to school?" I asked. It seemed beyond pointless.

"We all miss being human," she said sadly, "so this way we can pretend. I don't know. It just works for us."

Hmm, it was definitely intriguing.

"Are you going to pick me up for school on your Harley tomorrow?" I asked directly and Bella smirked.

"Well I would have, but I can't."

"Why?" I asked.

"Edward and I have plans, we're getting an early jump on the weekend. We're heading to Goat Rocks Wilderness, just south of Rainier to do some hiking."

"You're going hiking?" I questioned. I didn't believe her at all.

"That's what I said," Bella replied. "Are you ever going to get out of my car? You better not be dripping blood everywhere."

I looked down at my chest. I hadn't even felt the pain in Bella's company, I had been too distracted by her.

"Okay," I said, "I'm leaving. I guess I'll see you Monday. Enjoy your hike." I just had to laugh at that and I could feel Bella's annoyance, but also a flash of something else. It seemed like love, but I couldn't determine exactly what kind of love it was or who it was directed at. I watched her leave and headed inside to tend to my wounds. I had a million different thoughts running through my mind, but one stood out above all else, today had been a good day for me.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N- **Thank you to those of you who reviewed, I love hearing from you

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Six**

I wasn't really looking forward to today. I already knew that Bella wasn't going to be here, Edward too, and that just sucked. What was I supposed to do all day? Mike and the others were just too boring, selfish and generally unkind for my liking. I wanted excitement, spontaneity and Bella.

"So what did Isabella want yesterday?" Jessica asked me.

"I don't know," I answered. "She just wanted to sit with me I think."

"Oh, but why?"

Kill me now.

"Maybe she likes me," I said and Jessica glared at me.

That was it. I did not need to put up with this. I stood up and grabbed my food tray with no real plan. I saw the empty table I sat at with Bella yesterday, but it just seemed depressing. My eyes landed on the Cullen table next. Rose, Emmett and Alice were sitting there, but they weren't paying me any attention. I decided I had nothing to lose so I made my way over to them and sat down next to Rose. She looked up and smiled at me.

"What are you doing here?" Emmett asked and he didn't seem too happy.

"Jessica's annoying me, they all are," I said.

"If you say so, Romeo," Emmett said and I could tell that he didn't believe me.

"Romeo?" I asked.

"Isabella told us that you were serenading her yesterday," Emmett explained.

Oh, that.

"Is there any secrets in your family?" I asked, remembering that Bella had revealed that Edward had told her most, if not all of my thoughts.

"Secrets don't do anyone any good," Emmett said wisely.

"Umm, hi, I'm Alice, we haven't had a chance to meet yet."

I looked up at her, she was a small little thing with short hair and she seemed so shy which was unusual.

"Jasper, ma'am," I said, laying on the charm thickly.

Alice smiled to herself and looked down at the table.

"How do you do that and can you teach me?" Emmett asked, leaning closer to me.

"Do what?" I asked, eating my food.

"Make anyone do what you want. I mean, we have the gift of persuasion, but I still can't do what you can. Tell me how you do it."

I shared a look with Rose. She seemed to be torn between her love for Emmett and his stupidity.

"It's easy," I told him. "Alice is coming off shy, so she doesn't need me bombarding her."

"Oh," Emmett seemed thoughtful. "So you just guess?"

I let out a sigh. I thought sitting here would be simpler, but Emmett wasn't making things easy.

"No, you never guess, guessing is bad," I said.

"But-"

"Em, just drop it," Rose said and Emmett listened to her, thank god for that.

"So why didn't you go 'hiking' with Bella and Edward?" I asked the group making sure they knew that I didn't believe they were hiking at all.

"We can't all go hiking at once, it would be suspicious," Rose said.

"And they couldn't wait for the weekend because?" I asked.

"Maybe Isabella needed a break from you," Emmett said smartly. "Maybe she's getting back with Edward."

I let out a laugh at that one. I doubt Edward would give up Doc Cullen for Bella. I could feel Emmett's frustration and annoyance towards me so I laughed harder.

"Maybe sitting here was a mistake," I said, moving to get up. It was all a ploy.

"No, stay," Alice's small voice spoke. I smiled; everything went exactly how I wanted it to.

Now there were two people at this table that wanted me here. Maybe Emmett too, but I wasn't making any assumptions where he was concerned because supernatural being or not he was huge. I was a skilled fighter, but I doubt I would be able to best him, not whilst I was human at least. I shook my head to clear the thoughts and I was glad that Edward wasn't here to read my thoughts, that I was thinking about changing for Bella. Hell, I didn't even know if they were vampires or werewolves, yet I was willing to change. It was stupid, but it spoke volumes.

* * *

It was Saturday and I meant to sleep in, but a once familiar and loved thing woke me up; the sun. It was shining brightly and I was certain that I was dreaming as it was the first time I had seen it since I moved here. I hurried to the window and there it was. It felt so warm on my skin and it made everything look brighter. I had a good feeling about today.

Mike picked me up and we drove around and picked everyone else up.

"You came," Jessica said, sitting up front in between Mike and I. She was sitting too close for my comfort, but there was nothing I could do about that.

"Of course," I said, "I told you I was coming."

"I know, but I half expected you to cancel because of Isabella," Jessica said and that made me mad. I was a man of my word and even if something had come up with Bella I would have told her no. I turned from Jessica and looked out the window.

It was only fifteen miles to La Push from Forks, so thankfully I wasn't stuck next to Jessica for too long. The moment Mike stopped the car I jumped out, eager to be away from them all.

"I'm going to go and find Jacob Black," I said to Mike and he frowned. "He's fixing my truck," I expanded. "I want to know how close I am to getting my wheels back."

Mike nodded his head. "Do you need someone to go with you?" he asked.

"It's La Push," I answered. "I'm sure I can figure it out."

Mike smiled at me and I turned from them before Jessica or Lauren could get their claws into me. I remembered La Push vaguely from my summer's here and the more I walked and saw, the more I remembered. It wasn't hard to find the Black's house, I remembered the red-ish timber. I knocked on the door, but no one answered so I headed for the garage.

"Hello?" I called out.

I heard a noise, so I waited by the door.

"Can I help you?" a boy with short black hair and russet skin asked me.

"Jacob Black?" I asked and he nodded his head. I smiled at him. "I'm Jasper Whitlock, Charlie's son. I was at First Beach, so I thought I would come by and check on my truck."

"Oh, yeah, of course man, how are you?" He shook my hand. "It's been so long since I saw you, you've grown. You used to be so small."

I managed not to react at that remark.

"I've been good, how are you?" I could have mentioned that he had grown too, but I wasn't that petty.

"Good, good," he said. "I bet you want to see your truck." I nodded my head. "It wasn't in the best shape when I got it, but I've been working hard."

I followed him into the garage.

"So how do you like the truck?" Jacob asked me. "Well apart from the incident of course."

"It's good," I said, "and technically it saved my life, so it's a keeper."

"I'm so glad Charlie bought it, dad wouldn't let me start working on another with this one still here. I'm back working on it now, but that's fine because it's only temporary and I'll be able to use all these skills for my Rabbit."

"So you build cars?" I asked.

"Yeah, when I have free time and spare parts. You wouldn't know where I could get my hands on a master cylinder for a 1986 Volkswagen Rabbit do you?" I noticed that he had a deep husky voice and it reminded me of the thick Texan accent from back home. I found it comforting.

"No, sorry," I said. "I barely know my way around town."

"Of course," he said. "Well here it is." I looked at my truck and it looked good, better than it did for sure. "The engine and everything is fine," Jacob said, "it's just the body. I've been working on reshaping the metal back to what it's supposed to be and then I'm going to paint it for you."

"You don't have to do that," I said. "I don't mind if the paint's chipped."

"It's no trouble," Jacob said.

"Okay," I accepted, "but just so you know, I have to get lifts from Charlie in his police cruiser, so if there is anything I can do for you at all to speed this process up you let me know, okay?"

"Understood," Jacob said, "but I'm a hard worker and I've spend all my time on this."

"I can see that," I praised him, "it looks amazing. I was so sure it would have to be scrapped, but no, you've really come through for me, thank you, Jacob."

"Please, call me Jake."

"Okay, Jake." I smiled at him and he smiled back. He had a genuine smile, so big and so bright.

"Now," I said, "I know this is going to contradict what I just said, but we're hanging out down at the beach, we're going to have a driftwood fire and I think a few people are going to try and surf, you should come, bring your friends. It will be fun, plus you probably deserve a break."

"You know what, I think I will. Thank you, Jasper."

"No problem, Jake. I'll see you down there and thanks again for my truck."

He seemed embarrassed by my gratitude, so I quickly left and walked back to the beach.

When I reached the beach things were in full motion and I noticed that some of the Quileutes were already here. I walked over to the fire as that's where everyone seemed to be congregating.

"How's your truck?" Mike asked me.

"Healing," I answered and he laughed.

"Have you ever seen a driftwood fire before?" Mike asked, sitting down on one of the bone-colored benches.

"Yeah," I answered as I looked at all the different colors in the flames. It always amazed me that a fire could be more than the standard yellows and oranges, and this one was blue and green due to the salt, it was really impressive. I just wished Bella was here with me, I bet she would enjoy it.

I shouldn't have thought of her as that's all I could think about now. I started walking around, distancing myself from the others. I had asked Bella if she would come, but she said no. Hiking or not I had a feeling there was more to why she didn't come. Bella had also told me to keep an open mind and something about both vampires and werewolves existing. Did that mean this had something to do with the Quileute tribe? It would make sense. I had been told the legends when I was a small boy, but I didn't remember them, they weren't important to me, but I bet they were now.

I looked around. There were plenty of Quileutes here, but I needed to choose the right one. I didn't need them to know that I was digging around, nor did I want them to know about my connection to Bella and the Cullens. I needed to be very smart about this. I scanned the group of people until I picked my target. They were perfect. I smiled and made my way over to them. I stopped a ways away and waited for them to meet my eyes and when they did I smiled. Once they returned it I motioned for them to come over and they did. This was too easy at times.

"Who are you?" they asked before flushing red. "I'm sorry, I mean, I haven't seen you around before."

"I'm Jasper," I said, subtly leading them away from the others. "Do you know Chief Swan?" they nodded their head. "I'm his son, I just moved here from Texas."

"Wow, Texas, I've always wanted to go there." I smiled. I had picked my target well, they were so ready and willing to spill information and that's what I needed. "I'm Seth, Seth Clearwater."

Seth. I picked him for many reasons. One, he was sitting by himself, clearly an outsider. Two, he was considerably younger than the others. Three, he reminded me of myself, he was small, there was nothing to him, and that meant I would be able to relate to him and he would be able to see this. He was prefect.

"So you're what, sixteen?" I asked, over-estimating to make him feel good and it worked.

"No, fourteen," he answered. "You really think I look sixteen?"

I moved my head to the side and looked at him closely.

"Sure," I said and he smiled brightly, it almost even rivaled Jacob's. He was pleased with my assessment, so pleased. "Are you a part of the Quileute tribe here?" I asked.

"Of course," Seth exclaimed excitedly.

"That's really cool," I said. "I think it would be so cool to be a part of something like that. I remember hearing about the legends when I was younger, but I can't remember them anymore."

"Oh you mean how we descended from wolves?" Seth asked.

Bingo! And I didn't even need to ask. If the Quileutes were wolves then that meant that the Cullens were vampires. I felt as though I could trust Seth, so I decided to try and dig a little deeper.

"I think I remember that," I lied easily. "Wasn't there something about vampires too?"

"Yeah, the cold ones." Seth seemed overly excited about this. I played right into it.

"Wolves and vampires, that's pretty cool."

"I know right," Seth said. "The cold ones are supposed to be our enemy, but I don't see it like that at all. They're cold, fast, strong and just so kickass. Leah's always telling me that my love for them will get me in trouble… Oh, Jasper, you won't tell anyone will you?" Now he was feeling worried.

"Of course not, Seth. I think they're cool too. Can I ask you a question?" I lowered my voice and Seth leaned in closer. "Are the Cullens the cold ones?" He looked at me confused. "You don't have to answer if you can't, but I just noticed that they're very cold and unusual, fast too, I just thought… Maybe I'm wrong. I'm sure I am, I'm sorry for even mentioning it," I bumbled and Seth felt sorry for me, this was too easy.

"They are," he said softly, "the Cullens, they're vampires. They came into our territory and their leader made a truce with us. They would stay off our land and we wouldn't tell everyone their secret. The only reason the treaty was made is because the Cullens are civilized, they only drink animal blood, not human, so there's no real risk, well I guess there is a risk, but in all this time there's never been an incident."

"How long ago was this?" I asked.

"I don't know, a couple of generations, more than fifty years. They have two new vampires now, a mated female and male, but the rest were all present when the treaty was made."

That meant that Bella was at least fifty years old, if not more. It was confronting, but I decided not to think on it right now. I would have plenty of time to mull it over when I was completely alone.

"Do you even believe me?" Seth asked, insecurities shining through.

"Of course," I told him, "it makes perfect sense."

"And you won't tell anyone? Because I'll get in trouble if you do."

"Tell you what," I said, "you give me a name and if it ever gets out I will lie and say that person told me, not you. Now who do you want?"

"Paul," Seth said, not missing a beat, smiling gleefully.

I was right in thinking that Seth had been picked on because of his build and age. I might just have to track down this Paul and put him in his place.

"You've got it," I said, smiling at Seth. "Let's head back to the fire, maybe I can show you how to properly skip a rock."

"Really?" Seth asked, excitement shining through. He was still so young.

It was contagious and I smiled. Seth really was a positive boy.

"Really," I told him.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review, it means so much to me

**Please Note: **When I write chapter (whatever) at the start of my chapters in this story it refers to the chapter in the book (Twilight) so if you want to follow along you can. Now seeing as this chapter will be completely original I'll just write 'added chapter' to avoid confusion

Enjoy

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**Added Chapter**

I stood in front of the mirror and wiped the steam off. My chest glared back at me. It had definitely started to heal, but every time I took a shower it softened the scab and it started leaking puss. It was so gross, but unavoidable and because of this it would take longer to heal and I hated that. It hurt to move and sit, and I always had to have it wrapped up in bandages otherwise I'd never be able to wear a shirt. Simply put, it was hell, but the alternative was death, so I knew I was complaining over nothing. Road rash would heal, being dead… well, there was no coming back from that.

Unless you became a vampire... I still didn't know. Seth had confirmed it for me yesterday. Bella and her family were vampires, but I still didn't know much. All I knew was that they were cold, fast, strong and that they snacked on animal blood, not human. It wasn't enough. What about all the myths? Sunlight, garlic, crosses, churches, did they need to be invited in? I needed more answers and I hoped to get them soon otherwise I'd just drive myself crazy. I knew Bella wasn't dangerous, but I needed to understand just how dangerous she could be if she chose.

I looked for my clothes and cursed myself for forgetting them once again. Back in Houston I had my own private bathroom so grabbing clothes to have a shower was not an issue. I cracked the door open and looked for Charlie, I couldn't hear a thing. I opened the door further and made a mad dash, but it was pointless as Charlie just happened to step out of his bedroom right when I was hurrying past. Great.

"Jasper," he said, his voice grave. There was no doubt that he had seen my scars, my only real hope now was that he wouldn't overreact.

I didn't stop. I ran into my room and shut the door firmly behind me.

"Jasper," Charlie said from outside my room. "Jasper, who did that to you? Open up now."

He started turning the handle, but I held on to it tightly.

"Jasper," he pleaded. "You need to let me in."

"I know, I know," I said exasperated. "Just please let me get dressed first, at least let me put on a shirt." Now I was the one pleading with him.

"Okay," he accepted. "If you're not downstairs in ten minutes I'm coming for you."

I listened to him walk away and I loosened my death grip on the door handle. I backed away and my breathing started to pick up. This is not what I wanted at all. I was seventeen, nearing eighteen. I was almost a legal adult. I never wanted Charlie to know that I was scarred, but now that he did, there was only one way out of this. I had to tell him everything. I quickly dried off and got dressed. My shirt stuck to my chest, but I had no time to reapply my bandages right now. I did not need Charlie coming back up here and seeing my scars for a second time, once was more than enough.

I walked down the stairs and Charlie was sitting in his chair. I sat down on the couch, resting my elbows on my knees, bending over protectively. It hurt my chest to do so, but I didn't want Charlie to get a good view of my covered chest and start imagining the worst. I needed to keep it out of view the best I could.

"Start talking," Charlie said, but I didn't say anything.

What was I supposed to say? Where was I going to start? How could I admit it all to Charlie?

"Did Phil do this to you?" Charlie asked.

"No," I answered clearly.

"Renée?" He asked, choking up. He didn't even want to think it, let alone say it out loud and I didn't blame him.

"No," I answered.

"Then who, Jasper? You didn't do this to yourself did you?" Charlie seemed so heartbroken and it killed me inside.

"I did not do this to myself," I told him. "I was in a bad, abusive relationship and they did this to me. Not mom, not Phil. I swear."

"Who are they? Why did they do this to you? Jasper, are you gay, it's just I can't imagine a woman doing this to you."

"I'm not gay," I said. "You said it yourself, dad, I'm small, I'm scrawny, I always have been. I was only thirteen when we met and she was… She cared for me, so I cared for her. I got in too deep. She was so sweet at first, so loving and attentive, so caring. She had my love and trust completely and she knew that. That's when she started to change. She would let me get away from her and just when I thought I was almost free she would pull back on the rope tied around my neck and snap me back into place. I think she thought that she could break me, she tried, but I held on. I don't know how. Maybe I'm stronger than I thought."

"Jasper, you need to go to the police about this," Charlie said.

"I just did, you are the police," I answered back smartly, but Charlie wasn't too happy with that. "Dad, I just want to move on. I'm out of there now, I'm doing good. I broke up with her a long while ago, so it's all good."

"And if she does this to someone else?" Charlie asked, hitting me right where it hurt most. "What then? Is it still all good? Just because you're free doesn't mean it's all good, Jasper. People like this don't change. If their victim leaves them then they find another one. I've seen it before."

"I see your point, I do," I said, "but it'll be my word against hers, I have no proof." I saw Charlie glance down at my chest. "It would never work," I said, "my scars could have been self-inflicted like you said or it could easily be pinned on Phil. I don't want to drag them into this, I didn't want to drag you into this. We just need to move forward. I am free and I am fine."

Charlie didn't seem convinced.

"Dr. Cullen looked me over and I explained it all to him," I said and Charlie looked relieved. "He said I'm fine physically."

"And mentally?" Charlie asked.

"Good," I answered honestly. It was emotionally I was worried about, but with that said I thought I was doing fine considering.

"I'm sorry this happened to you, Jasper, maybe if I have been around more, maybe if I had moved to Houston to be with you."

"Dad, stop," I told him. "We can play the 'what if' game as much as we want, but it'll get us nowhere. Even if you were closer I would never have told you. I'm a private person you know that. Let's just forget it."

"I can't just forget it. I saw the scars, they're everywhere. I can't believe someone hurt my boy."

I hated that Charlie was blaming himself.

"How about this?" I said. "I know you have to go to work soon, so how about I come with you? That way you can keep a close eye on me and see that I am in fact fine and I can watch you in action. I used to love doing that as a boy, remember?"

Charlie smiled at the memory.

"Okay," he accepted. "Finish getting ready and we'll leave."

I quickly left the room to give Charlie his space. I breathed out a sigh of relief, the hard part was out of the way.

Once in my room, I pulled my shirt off and applied the antiseptic cream to my wounds before bandaging myself up and getting a new shirt. I made my way back downstairs and Charlie was smiling at me sadly. I hoped he would stop that soon because although I liked that he cared for me I couldn't handle his sadness and regret towards me for much longer.

The drive to the station was silent, but I was excited. I hadn't suggested this trip for nothing. I was hoping that Garrett was working so I could meet him and maybe even grill him about being a vampire and what all that meant. Seth had implied that Garrett and Alice had joined recently and Bella had said that Garrett needed more support than the others. Did that mean he was a human drinker before he met the Cullens? I wasn't sure.

We entered the station and I immediately looked around for Garrett. I was sure I would be able to spot him with the Cullen's ridiculously good looks, pale skin and golden eyes, but no one stood out. I was disappointed. This wasn't going to plan at all.

"Dad?" I asked. "Is Garrett working today?"

He looked at me oddly before answering.

"Yeah," he gruffed out. "That's him over there."

I looked to the person, er, vampire Charlie was pointing at and what met me wasn't what I expected at all. Sure Garrett was good looking, but he looked scruffy, worse for wear. His hair was long, but not overly so, but it was his eyes that got me. They weren't gold, they were a muddy brown-gold. He definitely didn't look like a Cullen, which made sense as Carlisle didn't change him, but Carlisle didn't change Alice either and she looked exactly like them.

"Do you mind if I introduce myself?" I asked as Charlie sat down at his desk.

"Fine," he said, "just stay where I can see you okay?"

I could feel Charlie's worry and sorrow towards me, it was too much. I needed to distance myself from him. I nodded my head and walked over to Garrett. He didn't even turn around to greet me.

"Jasper Whitlock," he said clearly.

"Garrett…" I trailed off, I didn't know his last name.

"Garrison," he told me. "It's Garrett Garrison."

Really, that was his name? How old was he with a name like that?

He turned to face me and looked at me critically.

"You're smaller than I imagined," he said and my eyes flashed with anger, my nostrils flaring.

I was bombarded with thoughts of Maria and my past tormentors. They all picked on me because of my size and I was powerless to fight back. I sized Garrett up next, sure he was a vampire, but he wasn't that much taller than me. I could probably take him. I was still holding on to some hope that I was still growing. I wanted to pass the six foot mark because then no one would ever call me small again. I wondered if Garrett could read minds like Edward, but it didn't seem like it.

"What?" he asked me.

I didn't answer. I was still too upset.

"Garrett," Charlie said, coming over and resting his hands on my shoulders. "This is my boy Jasper, I hope he's not bothering you too much."

"Of course not, Chief. I'm just glad I finally get to meet the exceptional young man you're always talking about."

Charlie talked about me? I blushed at the comment.

"Okay, good," Charlie said, leaving us alone.

"Your dad is the best," Garrett said "I hope you know that. He also has a kickass mustache, I wish I could grow one like that."

"I know what you are," I blurted out.

"Do you now?" He said and I could tell that he was playing with me and I stupidly played right into it.

"What?" I asked confused. I hardly ever got confused, but I found Garrett hard to read.

"You still have so much to learn," he said, "but know this, my mate, Alice, she can see the future and I know exactly where you'll end up and what part you'll play in all this."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"Now, now," Garret said. "I can't tell you that, it'll ruin the surprise and my enjoyment, but know that I can't wait to see how you handle what's in store for you, and who knows maybe you'll even survive, but then again I would be foolish to bet against my mate. Goodbye, Jasper."

I watched him leave the station and I was utterly and completely dumbfounded. What the hell just happened? Alice could see the future, my future? And I was going to die? What? This was all too confusing and I came to a sudden realization, for the first time since moving to Forks, I had just made my first mistake and I couldn't take it back.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N- **Thank you so much for stepping up. It was good hearing from you all.

Enjoy

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**Chapter 8 + 9**

It was Monday and my mind was still screwed up. Meeting Garrett had not gone as planned and furthermore he seemed immune to my charm and just generally smarter than me. It was a sobering feeling and I still didn't know what to do about it, but currently I was more focused on Bella. This would be my first time seeing her since I found out exactly what she was. I had caught sight of her in the hallway and I could sense that she was nervous, but I knew I must wait until lunch to confront her about it all. We just needed to get everything out in the open and let the chips fall where they may.

I walked into the cafeteria and saw Bella sitting by herself. I didn't bother grabbing any food, I just made my way over and sat down across from her, so I could read her face better. She was still nervous, but she had no reason to be. I still hadn't fully accepted that she was a vampire and I was still confused on exactly what that entailed, but I definitely wasn't running and I wanted her to know that first and foremost.

"You're a vampire," I said, but offered no more.

"And?" Bella asked.

"And what?" I said.

"That's it?" she asked. Did I need more? "What are your feelings on it? Did you do any research? Anything else?"

"Well no, no research. I feel…" I always hated saying how I felt as it was hard for me to define. I could look at almost anyone and know exactly how they were feeling, but I was terrible when it came to myself, "fine," I landed on and I could tell that didn't please Bella at all. "I'm not going to run from you," I said, "but I do have some questions."

"Go ahead," she said.

"How old are you physically?" I asked and she seemed surprised.

"Twenty-two," she answered.

"And how long have you been a vampire?"

"Since 1924."

1924? Fuck, that's old. I made sure not to react because although Bella wasn't human I knew just how much females didn't like to be told they were old.

"What about sunlight?" I asked. "Surely it doesn't kill you if you're able to be out in the daytime."

"No, it doesn't kill us, but it does affect us."

"How?" I asked.

"You would never believe me if I told you. Maybe one day I'll show you though." She was speaking the truth, so I decided to drop it for now.

"Do you sleep?"

"Why did you ask me that?" Bella asked, confused.

"It's just… I…" I trailed off. Bella was looking at me so critically and I felt like I was doing something wrong. "You never tire," I told her. "Humans, they get sleepy, bored and irritated, I can sense it, but not you. Your emotions run at the same level unless you're feeling something abnormal, in that case they increase, but they never decrease. So I just thought that maybe, because you never tire, you never sleep."

She was still looking at me closely and I swear I could feel her pride towards me.

"We don't sleep," she admitted. I could still sense her pride, but it soon shifted to anticipation, she was excited to hear what I would ask next.

"Why don't you drink human blood?" I asked. "Do you and your family like being vegetarians?"

She let out a small laugh at that.

"We're nothing like vegetarians," she said, "it's just a choice."

"So why do you choose it?" I asked. "Wouldn't it make you weaker? Does it truly satisfy you? Is it because the animals put up more of a fight?"

"I hunt animals because that's what Carlisle does," Bella answered simply and it was disappointing to hear.

"It seems you do a lot of things because Carlisle tells you to," I said, referring to her falling in love with Edward. It was a low blow, but it needed to be said.

"I know that," she said and I was surprised she wasn't feeling any anger, "but he saved me, more than once, so I feel as though I owe him."

Why would a vampire need saving? Maybe she was talking about her human life… I wanted to ask her to clarify, but she was getting defensive, so I decided to keep this conversation on track.

"Were you hunting this weekend with Edward?" I asked.

"Yes," she answered, guarded, afraid of my next question.

"What did you eat?" I asked. "Was it bear?"

"Yes, actually, how did you know?"

"You have brown fur stuck in your teeth," I told her and she actually ran her tongue across them to check. I laughed out loud, she was too easy, unlike Garrett.

I felt a flicker of love from Bella again and I stopped laughing and focused on her. Whatever she was feeling was soon gone and yet again I could feel nothing from her. I wondered why that was, maybe she had a gift like Edward's mind reading. I decided to ask her.

"Do you have a gift like Edward and Alice?"

"Alice?" she questioned. "I never told you Alice had a gift."

"No, you didn't," I admitted. "Garrett did."

"When did you see Garrett?" she asked and she was suddenly nervous and scared for me. "Please tell me that you weren't alone with him."

What was going on?

"No," I answered. "I was at the station with Charlie and I said hello to Garrett, that's all. Why can't I be alone with him?"

"Garrett is new to our diet," she said, leaning closer to me. "He spent centuries ingesting human blood, he can't be trusted on his own."

Centuries? Shit and here I thought Bella was old.

"But he's alone at the station," I said, "well not around other vamps at least. What's the difference?"

"Garrett's brain is hard-wired," she said sadly, "he's programed to only attack the young, the weak."

"You think I'm weak?" I asked.

"Yes," Bella answered honestly, "but all humans are weak to us. Just please stay away from him, Jasper, I don't want him to kill you."

"And you really think he will?" I asked looking up at Alice, but she wasn't looking at us.

"I don't know," Bella admitted.

"Wouldn't Alice be able to see if he attacks me?" I asked, remembering Garrett's ominous warning about my apparent death.

"It's not that simple," Bella answered. "Alice's gift works on decisions, so every time someone changes their mind the vision changes. Garrett is essentially immune to her gift because he was trained for war, he was trained to run several decisions and outcomes in his mind simultaneously, all the time, she can't keep up with him. She may get a vision here or there, but it's never solid, it's ever changing."

Oh, well that sucked. I couldn't work out what gift was worse, being able to hear everyone's thoughts or constantly seeing a future you wanted only to have it changed. I found Alice's was the worst of the two.

"So?" I said, trying to get back on track. "Do you have a gift?"

"Yes," Bella said, "I'm a mental shield."

Well, no offense, but that sounded lame.

"And exactly what does that mean?" I asked.

"Simply," she said, "Edward can't read my mind."

Okay, so maybe I was wrong, that didn't seem half bad.

Lunch ended and I was actually glad as I had a lot to think about and it all had to do with Garrett. Bella had said that Garrett spent centuries ingesting human blood and that he wasn't to be trusted. I vaguely remembered her saying that he fought in an army or something, a vampire army I assumed, but I wasn't sure exactly what that meant. What would vampire armies fight for? I was at a loss and I didn't know how to figure it out. I was certain this was the key to why Garrett was the way he was because he was definitely different to the rest of the Cullens and I doubted they had fought in any wars… Wars, that had to be it. Perhaps Garrett was suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder like human soldiers did.

"Jasper, did you hear me?" someone asked and I looked up at Angela.

"No, sorry, what did you say?"

"Some of us are heading to Port Angeles tonight to go shopping for the spring dance and I know you're not going, but I thought maybe you'd like to come and get out of Forks for a bit. Your truck's still being repaired right?"

"Right," I said. Angela was so thoughtful. "Do they have a bookstore?" I asked, a plan quickly forming.

"They do," she said. "So you'll come with us? I don't want you to feel left out even though you're not attending."

"If you personally get me to the bookstore and back home again then I am in." I smiled at her and she smiled back.

"Good, we're leaving straight after school. You can ride with me if you want and not Jessica and Lauren."

"That would be good, thank you."

Angela nodded her head and turned back around.

I smiled, things were working out well. If Garrett was suffering from PTSD then I was certain that there would be a book on it. I was hoping I could find one and read up on it because the more I understood Garrett and where he was coming from, what he was feeling, the more I would be able to stay ahead of him and figure him out.

School ended and Angela drove me to Port Angeles. It was a pleasant drive and Angela spent a lot of it talking about Ben. She was going to the dance alone, but I took the time to tell her exactly why she should ask Ben out and I could tell that she was slowly coming around to the idea. I hoped she asked him because I could tell just how much she liked him. Angela pulled up to the bookshop and I turned to her.

"We're going to be dress shopping," she told me, "so it might be a while."

"That's fine," I said, "don't worry about me. You have my number so just text me when you're done and I'll meet you right here."

"Okay," she accepted.

"Thank you," I told her sincerely, "and have fun."

I got out of the car and watched her pull away. I entered the shop and went straight for the war section. I knew I could probably find what I was after in the psychology section, but I was hoping that there was a book tailored to PTSD and the effects of war specifically. I found where I needed to be and started searching. There were many books and biographies and I read the back of all of them, but none of them were right. I knew this wouldn't be that simple, but I was still hopeful. I grabbed one of the autobiographies by a guy who fought in Vietnam and I cracked it open, scanning the pages quickly, looking for something.

Towards the back the word PTSD stood out to me and I read the paragraph. This was exactly what I was after. The guy, Leonard Hoyt, was an American soldier who fought in the Vietnam War and he had definitely seen his fair share of mayhem and when he returned home he was definitely suffering. It was a really interesting read and I found myself getting sucked in. I read paragraph after paragraph, page after page, just willing the information to make sense to me.

"Excuse me," someone said and I looked up. "We're closing soon… Also, this isn't a library and seeing as you've read most of that book you're going to have to pay for it."

"Oh, right, sorry," I said, "I just got sucked in."

"I guess you love to read," the girl said as I followed her to the cash register.

"Sure do," I answered and she smiled at me.

I paid for the book and she said one final piece before I left.

"Enjoy the book."

"I will," I told her.

I stepped outside and the sun was setting. I hated winter here, it got dark way too early and it was depressing. I pulled out my phone, but as I had no message from Angela yet, I decided to sit down under the streetlight and keep reading.

_It felt as though I was doing nothing. I had gone from fighting for my country to merely existing. I missed the purpose, I missed the direction, I missed the constant fear that someone was sneaking up on me; I missed it all. It was too calm here, too quiet, too safe. I had been exposed to the real world and I would never be able to forget it. Death, destruction and duty. Everything I had done, the people I killed… No one here could understand exactly what I went through. They try to, they sympathize with me, but they don't understand and they never will._

I heard a noise to my left and my head shot up.

"No, let me go," I heard someone say clearly.

I didn't think. I just jumped up, shoving the book in my backpack and running around the corner. I saw a man dragging the girl from the bookshop into the shadows. I didn't hesitate.

"Hey, let her go," I said, following them.

"Okay," they said simply, maliciously.

He let go of the girl and she quickly ran past me. She looked thankful, but she was too scared to stop. She just wanted to get out of here and I didn't blame her. I turned to leave as well.

"Hey, now," they said. "You don't get to leave, Jasper Whitlock."

The hairs stood up on the back of my neck. I knew that voice, it was Garrett.

"Garrett," I sighed, turning back around. "What are you doing here?"

"Why are you asking me questions? I'm the one in charge here."

How Garrett was acting reminded me of Leonard's story, but I hadn't read enough yet, I hadn't processed it yet, so I was still at a loss.

I remembered his muddy brown/gold eyes. All the Cullens either had bright gold, dark gold, or black eyes, not muddy. And now that I thought about it they were almost a reddish brown, not a muddy brown. Had he been snacking on human blood all this time or had the centuries of human blood simply affected his eyes differently?

"Are you hunting humans?" I asked.

"Why would I hunt humans?" he questioned. "I am an animal drinker like the rest of my family." I could feel a flicker of disgust from him. "Plus, have you forgotten about Edward, he is a mind reader."

Yes, but Edward couldn't read Bella's mind and seeing as Alice's gift didn't work on Garrett perhaps Edward's didn't either. Bella had said that Garrett was constantly thinking out scenarios, actions, reactions, outcomes, all the different possibilities. Leonard had mentioned something similar in the book. He said it had consumed him, so maybe it consumed Garrett as well. Vampire brains must run at a faster speed than humans otherwise their super speed would be a waste. So maybe Garrett's thoughts went by too fast for Edward to catch, or maybe Garrett could simply block him. I wasn't sure, but I knew there was more to this. I pushed forward.

"Someone as smart as you has surely found a way to bypass Edward's gift," I said and I got a flash of anger from Garrett, but exactly why he was angry I wasn't sure. I hoped it was because I was figuring him out. I definitely needed to read more of my book as it was helping, but now was not the time.

"You're like me," Garrett said, but it seemed like he was muttering to himself, so I stayed quiet. "You must embrace your darkness."

He laughed manically.

"And so it begins, your downfall," he said once he had calmed himself. "This is going to be fun to watch."

I wasn't sure what he was talking about. Was he going to kill me now? I did interrupt his snack, so he was probably hungry. I hoped he knew just what I meant to Bella and that it would save me tonight, but I wasn't sure. He was a wild card. I needed to figure him out and fast.

"If you want my blood, just take it," I told him and he laughed.

"I don't thirst for your blood," he said, "it all tastes the same to me, but Bella, she thirsts for your blood, I can see it." Was Bella the one who was going to kill me? Surely not. "Though I guess I could cut out the middle man and just end it all right now," he said stepping towards me.

I didn't want to, but I protectively took a step back. Garrett's eyes were black and zeroed in on mine. I could feel his determination and his impatience, it was a deadly combination. My phone buzzed and I instinctively pulled it from my pocket and checked it. Angela was on her way. I needed to warn her to stay away. I looked up from my phone, but Garrett was nowhere to be seen. I spun around, looking in every direction, but he was gone. That was so strange. I was beginning to think that I imagined it all, but surely I didn't. I looked around one last time before heading back to the bookstore. When Angela pulled up I got in.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "You looked different."

"I'm fine," I said, smiling at her. My actions reassured her and she started driving.

I opened up my backpack and pulled out the book.

"Did you find what you were after?" Angela asked me.

"Yeah, I did. Did you find a dress?" I asked, but only to be polite.

I half listened to Angela's story about her, Jessica and Lauren trying on dresses, but I was more focused on the photo of Leonard Hoyt on the back on my new book. It was a side by side comparison of him before and after the war and he looked like a completely different person. He was so young, so damaged, hardened by the war, and I was certain that the same thing had happened to Garrett, but I didn't know what to do about it. The good guy in me wanted to fix him, but the sensible part of me was heeding Bella's warning that I needed to stay far away from him.

I wasn't sure which part would win out, but I was absolutely positive about three things. First, Garrett was putting on an act for the Cullens. Second, there was a part of him, and I didn't know how dominant that part might be, that wanted to see me fall. And third, I was positive that I wouldn't be able to leave this alone, no matter the cost to me.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N- **Thank you so much for the reviews

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

I woke up and pulled the book out from underneath my face. I guess I fell asleep reading about Leonard Hoyt and his life. It really was interesting and I was learning so much. The struggles he went through, how it affected his mind, the relationships he ruined because of it all. It had me not only thinking about Garrett, but myself as well. I had been through my own type of hell and I had made strategies and coping mechanisms to come out the other side stronger.

I was still making a lot of guesses when it came to Garrett and I didn't like that. Aside from Garrett there was only one person who had the answers I needed, Alice. I remembered how her gift worked and I knew exactly how to get her here. I made a decision that I was riding to school with Alice and I pushed all other thoughts out of my head. No Charlie and his cruiser, no truck, and definitely no Bella and her bike, definitely not that. I needed to get Alice alone. She was shy around the others, but I was hoping that alone I could charm her and get some much needed answers about her mate. I took a shower and starting formulating a plan. I knew I couldn't make it seem as though I was pumping her for information and I knew I couldn't solely focus on Garrett. I needed to be tactful.

When I was done, I had a loose plan. I grabbed some breakfast before looking out the window. There was a bright yellow car sitting in the driveway and I could see Alice sitting behind the wheel, just. She was so small and I worried how she'd be able to drive, but I guess vampire senses kind of overrode that. I made my way over to her and hopped in her car. I turned to her and smiled.

"Thanks for taking me today," I said. "I just wanted a chance to get to know you better. All of your family actually, but I thought I'd start with you if that's okay."

"Why?" she asked, her voice small.

"Because you're Bella's family," I said, "and I like her. There's a song and it says, _if you wanna be my lover you've gotta get with my friends_." I didn't bother singing the line. Pop songs were definitely not my thing, but they were relatable at times.

"I'm not Isabella's friend, Rosalie is," Alice said and I could tell that upset her.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, but at least you have Garrett."

"Yes, I do," she said smiling. She looked so happy and in love.

"How did you meet him?" I asked. We were still sitting in the driveway.

"I had a vision about him," she said, her voice soft. "He was lost, just wandering around. I waited days for him to show up and when he finally did and our eyes met we both just knew. It wasn't exactly easy because of Garrett's unique past, but it worked well for us. He wanted to avoid his past and I didn't remember mine. We were two peas in a pod."

"I met him briefly on Sunday," I said. "He was reserved, but he seemed like a good guy."

"He is," she said, feeling love towards her mate. "He actually told me about it, he said that he approved of you and trust me when I say that's high praise coming from him as he was trained to look at humans as nothing but a tool, a means to an end."

"He seemed a little irritable," I said, trying to dig deeper.

I wasn't sure what game Garrett was playing and who he was playing it with, but saying that he approved of me was definitely contradicting what I already knew.

"That's just Garrett," Alice said, "he's irritable. You can never get him on a good day, so don't even bother trying."

"Are you going to warn me to stay away from him like Bella did?" I asked.

"No," Alice said confidently and it was the first time I had sensed her real strength. "Garrett is not a threat to you, Jasper, I am sure of that." And she was, she felt so sure.

"This might be crossing a line and I haven't revealed my thoughts to anyone and I won't, but is Garrett still drinking from humans?" She looked at me confused and I could feel her bewilderment. "His eyes," I clarified, "they have some red in them. Now I don't know much about vampires and their eyes, but the gold just seems off. I thought maybe it was different for animal and human drinkers."

"You're right," she said, making a decision to trust me. "Garrett struggles with the animal diet. He tried it, he went cold turkey on human blood, but it just wasn't possible. He was so torn up about it because he wanted to find another way to live, he wanted to try for me. I supported him and we worked on coming up with a plan that worked for him. He drinks animal blood just like the rest of us, but every couple of months he will take human blood as well. It satisfies the beast inside of him."

"The beast?" I questioned.

"We all have darkness in us," Alice said, "we have to, it's our nature. Garrett has embraced his, he was the beast for centuries. The rest of us, we can feel our darkness, but we haven't embraced it. The animal diet helps with that, but it's mainly Carlisle. He's so good and he's never once slipped up. He's definitely someone we all look up to and aspire to be like."

"And what he did to Bella and Edward?" I asked. I knew Alice wasn't present during it, so it would be good to get an outsiders opinion.

"Look, Jasper, I wasn't there so I can't comment on it."

Well that was fair enough and I admired her honesty and bravery. Alice took this as her chance to start the car and pulled out of the driveway.

"Bella said that she was hunting bear," I said, "what is your favorite animal to hunt?"

"I can see why Isabella likes you," Alice said, "you're very direct and you never do as expected, you're also very calculated."

"Thank you," I said. She was very observant. "So what's your favorite animal?"

"Coyotes," she said and I was surprised.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yes, they're small which means that I can have many and not just one."

That was smart.

"And what about Garrett?" I asked next. "What's his favorite?"

"Taste wise it would be moose, for the hunt it'd probably be wolves."

"Not the wolves from the reservation surely?"

"No, strictly animals."

"And his hunting method?" I asked.

She didn't answer straightaway and I wondered if I had gone too far. Perhaps she was searching the future. Surely she could see what Garrett planned to do with me… Except she couldn't see Garrett, shit, I was on my own.

"Garrett has a unique way of hunting," Alice told me. "He tortures the animal first." I could feel her revulsion and horror. "I've tried to work with him on it, but no luck. It's just how he is, he can't help it."

Hmm, this was all definitely helpful and insightful. I had definitely made the right decision to ride to school with Alice this morning.

We arrived at school and went our separate ways. I spent most of my time reading my new book. I had read most of it already, but I was rereading the parts I thought were important and trying to relate them to Garrett and how or why he'd act a certain way. I now knew that he still drank from humans, but I understood that completely. Leonard always talked about what he missed, it wasn't the killing or the violence, but it was silly things like the smell of explosives and burnt flesh, maybe human blood was it for Garrett and being able to have that satisfied the beast inside him. It definitely made sense and I felt as though I was making some headway which was good. As long as I could stay ahead of him I would be fine.

"There you are," Bella said, coming up behind me.

"Here I am," I said, putting my book in my backpack.

"Do I need to be worried about you and Alice?" she asked.

"I don't know," I said, "do you?"

Bella looked at me closely.

"I'm ready to answer your question," she said and I wondered what question that was. "Should I stay or should I go?" she kindly reminded me. "You should stay," she said nervously. "I would like you to stay," she said stronger this time.

I smiled at her. She was finally vocalizing what I was feeling from her. This was definitely good.

"Okay," I accepted and I could tell that she wanted to hit me for my lack of response, but luckily for me she refrained.

I looked at Bella and noticed that she wasn't wearing a jacket, I didn't hesitate. The gentleman in me did what was right. I shrugged out of my jacket and handed it to her.

"What?" she asked, looking at it. "I don't need that, we don't get cold."

I pushed it towards her.

"I know, you're already cold, but you're not wearing one," I pressed.

She reached out and grabbed it begrudgingly.

"I hope this isn't some kind of jock thing," she said, putting my jacket on, "because if that's the case then I want you to earn a letterman jacket and give that to me."

I let out a laugh, I liked how she thought.

"Anything you want, Bella, you can have."

"Anything?" she asked.

"Anything," I said confidently.

"Okay," she said, stepping towards me and grabbing me behind the neck with too much force. I complied, I had no choice, but once I felt her lips on mine I didn't even care. My hands went up to her neck and I kissed her back. It was odd. Usually with Maria she would be the one in charge and I always tried to take that from her, but I never could. Bella on the other hand stepped down when I stepped up and I was able to control every aspect of the kiss and I loved it. I could sense Bella was getting past the point of no return, so I pulled back and she huffed before letting out a small growl. I laughed.

"If you're good," I told her, "there'll be more where that came from. Now come on, it's lunchtime."

I reached out and grabbed her hand, leading her towards the cafeteria. We entered the line and I reluctantly had to let go of her hand. We began grabbing our food and I noticed that her sadness mirrored mine and I smiled at that.

"Do you really have to go to Seattle on Saturday or was that just a lie?" she asked me.

"A lie," I admitted, "but now I kind of want to go, plus I told Charlie about it and I'd rather not deceive him any more than I have to. Why, are you not driving me anymore?"

"No, it's not that," she said. "I can still drive you. I was just wondering why Seattle."

"Oh, no reason, just dance avoidance mainly, but I'd like to check out their bookstores and maybe go to the zoo."

"The zoo?" Bella questioned. "Why?"

"Because you're a vampire who snacks on animals," I said with a smile. "I want to watch you squirm and struggle not to eat them."

"It's not like that, Jasper," she said. "Animal blood doesn't call to us."

"Does my blood call to you?" I asked, remembering Garrett's words.

"Yes and no," she answered honestly. "Your blood smells sweet and if given the chance I would try it, but it's not like I have to have it. I can control myself."

I found that I desperately wanted to offer her my blood, but I held back. Now was definitely not the time, but I would remember it for a later date.

We exited the line and headed over to her family. I let Bella sit down first and then I sat next to her. Bella sat next to Rose, who had Emmett by her. Edward was across from Bella with Alice next to him. Alice looked at me and I smiled at her. She took it as an invitation and slid her tray towards me before sitting down next to me. I could feel Edward's annoyance and he quickly voiced it.

"Great," he said. "Do I really smell that bad?" he asked Alice and I laughed.

"So, Jasper," Emmett said slowly, he was up to something. "Where were you last night?"

"Port Angeles," I answered and I could feel Bella's shock, I didn't turn to her. "The girls wanted to go shopping for dresses so I tagged along."

"Ha, I knew it," Emmett said, "pay up."

"Wait," Rose said, "did you really spend your time watching them try on dresses?"

"And," Edward added. "Did you give them your opinions on each and every dress?"

What was going on? They all seemed too invested in this.

"No, I went to a bookstore."

"Oh yeah," Bella said and everyone else groaned, except Alice, she seemed to have no part of whatever this was.

"What's going on?" I asked Bella.

"We bet on what you did there."

"What? When? I felt your shock, you only just found out about it."

"Vampire minds," Rose answered. "We process things quickly and can talk low enough that a human can't even register it."

"Okay, and Bella won because?" I asked. I couldn't believe they were betting on me, were they really that bored?

"I won because I said you would be doing something dull," Bella said.

"Books are not dull," I argued.

"You can keep on telling yourself that," Bella said.

"Oh, Bella," Edward said, smiling widely. "I seem to remember a human you who loved to read."

Bella glared at Edward and he shut his mouth before blowing his hair out of his eyes. He was huffing in disappointment and I laughed internally. Edward turned towards me and glared. Oh this was too much fun. I was definitely enjoying the Cullens and their unique dynamic. I could definitely see myself fitting in here and that was a good feeling.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review, it means so much to me

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

Charlie was driving out to the reservation and I decided to tag along. Bella was hunting alone and wouldn't let me come with her, and I found that I missed Seth. The drive was silent. Charlie was still processing what had happened to me and that I was scarred for life. I left him be as I knew that he dealt with these things internally. He seemed to be handling it well so I was hopeful that he would come around and realize that I was now safe and that I would never get myself into that type of situation again.

We arrived and I got out of the cruiser. Now it was time to break the news to Charlie.

"Is it okay if I go and see Seth?" I asked.

"Seth Clearwater?" Charlie questioned. "But we're here to see the Blacks; Jacob is fixing up your truck, free of charge."

"I know," I said, sounding grateful, "but I saw Jacob a few days ago and I don't want him to feel as though I'm breathing down his neck to get the job done."

"Oh, okay," Charlie said, "just stay out of trouble. Seth is a good kid and I want him to stay that way."

I nodded my head and Charlie told me which house was the Clearwater's. I walked the short walk and knocked on the door. Seth answered and he looked so excited, but also guarded. I guess he thought I would ditch him like most other people did, but I knew what it was like to be small and weak, so I would only show him kindness.

"Jasper, what are you doing here?" he asked and I found myself relaxing in his presence. He was just so positive, and with discovering that Bella was a vampire and trying to figure out Garrett I needed this break.

"I came to see you," I said, "do you want to hang out?"

"Yes, of course, just let me ask my mom first."

I smiled at him and he disappeared inside. I stayed on the porch. Seth came back with his mother and I smiled at her, ready to put on my charm.

"Hi, I'm Sue Clearwater," she said nervously. "Sorry, but Seth said you're Charlie's son?"

"Yes, ma'am," I said, reaching out and shaking her hand. "I just moved from Texas. I met Seth on Saturday and we hit it off. Dad was coming to see Billy, so I thought I would tag along and see if Seth wanted to do something."

"It will be dark soon," she said, worried.

"We won't be gone too long," I reassured her, but she was still guarded.

"And what will you be doing exactly?"

"Mom," Seth groaned, "please don't chase him off, he's my first real friend."

I could feel Sue's sadness. Seth and I were too alike and I vowed to make sure that he didn't end up like me. He would not find his Maria at all.

"We're just going to explore," I said. "You've got just beautiful land here on the reservation."

That seemed to win her over.

"Okay," she said, "but please keep him safe, Jasper, I'm trusting you."

"Mom, you don't need to worry," Seth said, "look at him. Jasper's so strong, you can see his muscles. No matter what happens he will protect me, right, Jasper?"

"Umm," I faltered, stuck on the fact that Seth thought I was strong and not weak. It was a first. "Of course," I said.

"Okay, have fun," she said and Seth smiled so brightly.

"Thanks, Mom," he said, bringing her into a hug.

We left his house and Seth was bouncing along the whole time. He was so happy and I wasn't sure I had ever sensed a negative emotion from him.

"So what are we doing?" Seth asked as I led us to the forest that separated Forks from the reservation.

"Vampire hunting," I said.

"Vampires," Seth said excitedly. "I am so in."

"Did you even hear what I said or did you stop listening at the mention of vampires?" I asked him and he looked at me sheepishly. He had. "Bella's hunting in these woods," I told Seth motioning towards them. "She doesn't want me to come, she thinks it'll be too dangerous, but I need to see her. I can't explain it, but I don't think I fully understand exactly what she is. I know she's a vampire, but that means nothing. I need to see it with my own eyes. So are you up for a little adventure?"

"Of course, but why did you ask me for, Jasper? I'm not strong like the others. I'm not even a wolf."

"I chose you because you are strong," I told him and he frowned. "You don't need to have muscles to be strong, trust me on that. Usually a strong mind beats physical strength any day, trust me. I used to be as small as you and it got me so down. People would pick on me, it was hell, but I worked on strengthening my mind whilst I waited for my body to catch up and now I have the best of both worlds. The same will happen to you Seth, just stay patient."

"You really think so?" he asked, hopeful.

"I know so. Now, you mentioned something about a treaty and that the Cullens can't come here?"

"Yes," Seth said and I led him further into the forest. "There's an invisible line running around the reservation and the Cullens can't cross it."

"Do you know where this line is?" I asked next.

"I think so," he said and I could tell he felt bad for not being sure.

"Good," I said, "that's more than I know so we'll figure this out together."

Seth took charge and I followed him.

"What are you going to do if we find her?" Seth asked nervously.

"When, Seth," I told him. "Not if, when. You need to think positively always. And I don't know, observe her from afar. I bought Charlie's hunting binoculars with me, so we'll see."

"It's just, they're very dangerous when they hunt. I don't know first-hand, only what I've been told, but they let themselves go and act on their instincts only. They can't think, they can't process things, if you get too close to Bella she'll probably kill you."

"Relax," I told Seth, "no one is getting killed today."

He relaxed a little, but not fully. It was good though, he needed a healthy dose of fear in him, me on the other hand had mostly lost mine and it wasn't ideal at times like these because I thought I was indestructible.

"This is the treaty line," Seth told me and we stopped at the edge of a large creek.

"We're going to have to find a way across," I said, heading downstream.

"No, this way," Seth said, heading upstream. I smiled at him, he was taking charge and that was a good thing.

Seth took me to a safe place to cross. A tree had fallen down and it made a good bridge. I jumped up and made my way across with no problems. I turned around hoping that Seth was following me, but he was still standing on the other side and he looked scared.

"It's all in your head," I told him. "Just don't look down, focus on me and tell yourself that you can do it."

He nodded his head and took a deep breath. He followed my instructions and made it across safely.

"I did it," he said, excitedly hugging me. "I can't believe I did it."

"You did great," I praised him, "and you can do it again on the way back. Let's go, I doubt hunting takes too long and we've got to beat the sun."

I led the way this time, heading further into the forest. I kept my eyes and ears open, but I couldn't see or hear anything. I stopped at the base of a large tree and started climbing it.

"What are you doing?" Seth asked and I looked down at him.

"Getting a better and safer vantage point," I told him. I had learned that from Leonard Hoyt. "Follow me," I said before climbing up higher.

I didn't go right to the top. I found a large sturdy branch and sat down on it. Seth soon joined me, but he stayed standing, gripping onto the trunk tightly.

"Wow, we're high up," he said, scared.

"Don't look down," I reminded him as I pulled my backpack off and grabbed the binoculars out.

I adjusted them and then started scanning.

"I can't believe I did it," Seth said. "I didn't know I was this strong, you were right, Jasper."

I scanned back and forth several times, but I saw nothing.

"We're going to have to go further into the forest," I told Seth, putting the binoculars away.

"Umm, Jasper, not to be a buzzkill or anything, but we can't just keep searching for her, this forest is too big."

"I know," I agreed regretfully. "Just one more tree and if nothing we'll head back."

"Okay," Seth accepted. He climbed down first and I watched him to make sure he was safe. When he was back on the ground I quickly climbed down.

We headed further into the forest and I looked for another good tree. When I found the one I wanted we repeated the process and once again Seth was amazed with his mental strength to overcome his fears and doubts, it was good to see. I scanned back and forth, but I couldn't see anything. I was about to give up when something caught my eye. They were moving too fast, but I could sense them. It wasn't until they stopped that I saw who it was, it was Garrett. I sucked in a breath and carefully watched him.

"What is it?" Seth asked. "Did you see her?"

"No, someone else," I answered. "No more talking we don't want to alert them to us."

I kept watching Garrett. It seemed as though he was stalking something. He moved so slowly. I got impatient and looked ahead and my eyes landed on Bella. Garrett was stalking Bella. I needed to save her.

"Whoa, what are you doing?" Seth asked, reaching out and grabbing my arm.

"He's after Bella," I said, "I must help her."

"She's a vampire," Seth wisely said. "She doesn't need your help."

I looked into his dark brown eyes and I knew he was right.

I temporarily gave up on my plan of escaping and worked on calming myself down. It appeared that Bella made me react poorly and I didn't like that. Seth was right, she didn't need my help and Garrett was her adoptive brother so I was probably overreacting. I looked through the binoculars again and watched as Garrett made his presence known. He perched on a fallen tree and watched Bella drain her elk. It was a little gross to witness, but I didn't look away. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but I could watch them and sense how they were feeling by their facial expressions and body language. It wasn't ideal, but it would have to do.

Garrett's choice of spot was above Bella, showing his dominance, but it also showed that he was giving her space. She looked up at him, still feeding from the elk, but she didn't falter. She must trust him because as Seth said, hunting was instinctual, so surely if she thought Garrett was a threat she would be reacting badly, but nothing. I watched them closely. Garrett was simply waiting, I wasn't sure what was going on. When Bella was done and had buried her kill things began to change. She looked at Garrett and she seemed annoyed.

Garrett walked towards Bella and stood in front of her, too close for my liking. She still looked annoyed, but she didn't step away from him. Their eyes locked and I could feel something coming from them, but I wasn't sure what it was from this far away. Garrett reached out and traced Bella's face, oh no. She leaned into it before abruptly pulling away from him. Garrett seemed upset, but he didn't react or step towards her again. Bella's face became angry and I could tell that she was yelling at him. My brain started processing it and it all suddenly clicked into place and I was not happy. I needed to be there and I needed to be there now.

I forgot where I was and I went to take a step. Shit, I was in a tree. I felt myself falling and I knew it was too late. Maybe this was how I would die, a simple slip up. I felt someone reach out and grab my shirt. I looked up and saw Seth reaching over the branch, one hand wrapped around the trunk gripping tightly and the other one wrapped around my shirt. I looked up at him bewildered. He wasn't strong enough to hold me for this long, adrenalin or not. When I could tell that he wasn't going to drop me I spoke.

"I thought you said you weren't strong," I said and I could tell that he was as shocked as me.

"I'm not," he said, never letting me go. "I just reacted and I was thinking about how you said I was strong, I don't know, and now you're not even heavy to me, but my arm's locked. I don't have the strength to lift you. Should I call out to the vampires?"

"No," I said quickly. I didn't want them to see me as weak at all. "We can figure this out. You're sure you won't drop me?" I asked.

"I'm sure," Seth said and he was.

I tried not to move around too much as I didn't want Seth's grip to slip or my shirt to rip. I was surprised it had held up this long. I looked around, trying to find a branch I could reach and grab on to. I made the mistake of looking downwards. We were definitely high off the ground, one wrong move and I would be dead. I knew it would be so simple to call out to Bella, but I couldn't do it. It reminded me of Maria too much. I turned to Maria, I relied on her. I knew this was a completely different situation and that Bella wouldn't take this much stock in me asking for her help, but I just couldn't do it personally. I knew my stance wasn't worth my life, but I was confident in Seth and myself, we could get out of this, I was sure of that.

I tore my eyes away from the ground as that wasn't helping me at all. Forget about me for a moment, if I slipped then I knew that Seth would blame himself and I couldn't have that at all. I needed to think. I was smart, I was cunning, I could do this. I looked at every branch and worked out a plan for each and then I chose the best option.

"Don't let go," I said seriously, looking up at Seth. He seemed nervous, but I could also see his strength.

"I won't," he said confidently.

"I'm going to move, just stay strong."

Seth nodded his head and I made my move. I swung my legs to the left and got my arms ready. I moved back and forth creating momentum.

"Let go now," I said commandingly.

I could tell that Seth wanted to hesitate and he usually would, but my tone of voice had him complying. He let go of my shirt and I could feel his horror. I swung myself to the left and reached out desperately for something to hold on to. My arms wrapped around the thick branch I was aiming for and my legs quickly followed. I was moving with too much force and as my body collided with the branch two things happened simultaneously. One, my fucking balls got smashed and made me lightheaded and it took all my willpower and strength not to let go of the branch; and two, my chin followed, hitting the branch with such a force that I almost blacked out. I think the only reason I didn't lose concentration and fall from the tree is because of Seth. I couldn't let him down, I couldn't destroy him.

I started slipping, but Seth had enough time to climb over to me and grab onto my shirt, to stop me from sliding off. Knowing he had me I closed my eyes and just lay there, trying to recover. The pain was searing and I could only focus on the darkness. I fought it, I did. It was hard, but I didn't want Seth to panic. We were still high up and until we were safely back on the ground and out of the forest there was no time for panic. The pain ebbed and flowed, but I think it was more that I was getting used to it. I lay there for a while longer before lifting my head and looking at Seth. He looked so frightened and relieved.

"I'm so glad you're okay, Jasper, you are okay right?"

"Just give me a minute," I said, clearly winded too.

Seth nodded his head and never let me go. It was wise as I wasn't sure I wouldn't slip into unconsciousness and fall. I kept focusing on Seth and my breathing as I slowly started to feel more like my old self. First I sat up, Seth never let me go. Then I started climbing down, Seth by my side touching me at all times. I hit the ground and sunk to my knees, so happy to be back on solid ground, Seth was still with me. I smiled at him. It had been a shock to both of us and I think we were both afraid to admit just how much it had affected us, but it had definitely bonded us together and I was sure that bond could never be broken.

"What are you doing out here?" someone asked and I looked up at Bella. The moment she caught sight of me her demeanor changed from annoyance to concern. "What happened to you?" she asked. "And who is this?"

"This is Seth. Seth, Isabella; Bella, Seth," I introduced.

Bella looked at him for a second before looking back at me.

"What happened to you?" she asked. "And what are you doing out here?"

"I had a slight mishap where I collided with a tree, no big deal," I said.

"No big deal, no big deal… Jasper, you have a gash on your chin and it's completely bruised black and blue. I've had my fair share of injures and this is definitely a big deal."

I reached up and touched my chin, disturbing the dry blood. Bella hissed and next thing I know Seth is throwing himself in between Bella and I. Bella laughed at him.

"You're not even a wolf," she said condescendingly.

"Hey," I said, standing up and pulling Seth back. "You do not talk to him like that. Seth is my friend."

Bella looked at me annoyed. I may as well go for broke here.

"So," I said, "how long have you and Garrett been sleeping together?"

"You were watching us?" she asked.

"Yes, I was. I was just curious about how you hunted, but I was being smart, I was keeping my distance. So how long have you been sleeping with Garrett?"

"I never slept with him, we fucked, and frankly that is none of your business."

"None of my business, are you fucking serious right now?" I asked.

Bella and I were in some weird kind of death stare and I completely forgot Seth was here until he spoke.

"Jasper, it's getting dark," he said, his voice sounding so small and it was all Bella's fault.

I turned to him and the moment I did Bella's anger disappeared. I turned back around and she was nowhere to be seen, she had run. I sighed.

"Come on, let's go," I told him.

Seth and I made the long trek back silently. I wanted to talk and reassure him, but my jaw was so sore it wasn't worth it. Seth made it back over the creek, but there was no excitement this time, no accomplishment, just nothingness and it sucked.

"Jasper?" Seth asked when we were closer to his house. "Are you and Bella going to be okay?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"She looked so worried for you when she saw you were injured. She cares for you. I don't want to be the reason you broke up."

"Firstly," I said, "it had nothing to do with you. And secondly, I think Bella and I are mated, so it's going to take a little more than this fight to keep us apart."

"Aren't you angry at her for sleeping with Garrett?" Seth asked.

"Look I don't know all the facts yet, but simply put, no. Bella's been alive a lot longer than me and I hope she's not a virgin because I sure as hell am not. I have a horrible past and I don't know how she'll react when it all comes out. I hope she'll come around just like I will for this."

"I don't understand it."

I let out a small laugh, but it hurt.

"Oh you will, someone will hurt you, Seth, I could lie and tell you otherwise, but someone will hurt you and it's usually the person you love."

"Okay." I could tell Seth was still unsure, but there was no more I could do. "Thank you for standing up for me, you didn't have to do that, but you did."

"Anytime, Seth." I smiled at him. I stopped just before we reached his house. "I'm just going to go, if your mom sees my face she is going to flip."

"She will," Seth agreed.

"I'll see you soon though," I told him. "And thanks for saving me today, you showed real strength and bravery."

Seth smiled so brightly and I could tell that he was proud of himself and as was I. I left him and headed back to the Black's and Charlie. Charlie great. I knocked on the door and hoped this would go well. Jacob answered and he looked at me concerned, but I wasn't worried about him. I stepped inside and both Charlie and Billy looked at me.

"Jasper, what happened?" Charlie asked, jumping up and tilting my head back to look at my injury.

"I had a fight with a wolf," I said, but no one seemed to appreciate my joke. Jacob was confused and I sensed his disbelief, Billy was scared and hostile, and Charlie was angry and concerned. "It was a joke," I quickly amended, but I think the damage was already done as Billy was still feeling aggression. "I tripped and hit a tree." It was the closest to the truth we were going to get here.

"It looks deep," Charlie said. "I think we'll have to get Dr. Cullen to take a look at it."

I let out a sigh and nodded my head.

We left the Black's immediately and Charlie took me straight to the hospital. He told the nurse that I was only going to see Dr. Cullen and thankfully it was the same one I had last time, so there was no issues. We were taken to Carlisle's office and Charlie came in with me.

"Charlie, it's good to see you. What can I do for you?"

"Jasper ran into a tree," Charlie said, stepping to the side.

I was confronted with Carlisle's beauty again and I had no idea why it had me so mesmerized. All the Cullens were beautiful, but there was just something about Carlisle.

"Oh my," he said and I stared into his bright gold eyes as he looked at my chin. "What are we going to do with you?" he murmured.

"Does it need stitches?" I asked.

"Unfortunately yes," he said.

I didn't really care, just another wound and yet another scar. It hardly even mattered anymore.

"I'll be outside," Charlie said, making a quick exit.

Carlisle let out a laugh at that.

"Your father's not too good with the gore."

"I know," I said as he got to work.

"So what happened?" Carlisle asked.

"I was trying to watch Bella hunt and I fell out of a tree, well kind of, I technically fell into the tree."

"Why are you being so forthcoming?" he asked me confused.

"Well Bella already knows, kind of, and all I ever hear is that the Cullens have no secrets. I don't know if that's one hundred per cent true, but it seems solid."

"It's true," Carlisle said, beginning the process of stitching me up. "We know most things. Sure we don't know everything, but with Edward and Alice's gifts it just makes sense to keep things out in the open."

I wanted to speak, but I waited until he had finished sewing my face back together first.

"I know a couple of things and I'm wondering if they're common knowledge or not," I said carefully, trying not to implicate anyone. "I don't want to tell you things you don't already know, but then I'm sure you must know because they all care for you so much. You're their father."

"Jasper, it's up to you whether or not you trust me, but I am a doctor so doctor-patient confidentiality is very important to me. Bella is my first daughter and she's changed since meeting you, she reminds me of her human self and that's great. I'm sure you know the part I played in her upbringing by now." I nodded my head. "It's one of my only regrets," Carlisle said and he was speaking the truth. "I knew Edward was mine and early on I tried to get close to him, but… he didn't want me. It seemed easier to please him with what he thought he wanted, a woman, then to accept the mateship."

I could understand that. It would have been a tough decision to make and I could tell that Carlisle was still struggling with how he dealt with it.

I decided to trust him. I needed answers so I would get them.

"What is Garrett's diet?" I asked, trying not to give it all away in case Carlisle didn't know.

"Animal and human blood," he answered and I was glad that Alice and Garrett weren't hiding it from him.

"So you're okay with him killing humans when you spend every day saving them?"

"No, of course not," he said, covering up my stitches. "We get him the blood from the blood bank."

Oh, that made sense.

"And you're certain that he doesn't kill humans?" I asked, thinking of the girl from the bookstore. Maybe she was simply a distraction to get me into that alley with Garrett. It seemed more likely the more I learned about him.

"We can't be sure," Carlisle said, "but I trust him."

"Okay," I accepted. "Do you also know about him and Bella?"

"Yes," Carlisle sighed. "We all do."

"Even Alice?" I asked. That can't be right.

"Yes. It's complicated, Jasper, but please know that it was consensual and agreed upon by the whole family, everyone got a say and a unanimous decision was reached."

"You didn't coerce Alice did you?" I asked. She was very shy so it would be easy to do.

"No, never," he said. "You need to remember that Edward can read Alice's mind."

"I don't understand it," I said, not afraid to admit it.

"Well I cannot tell you Bella's side of it, but Alice and Garrett claim that they're mated and Edward attests to this, but there's something missing in their relationship. They do the best with what they have, but something's not right. Maybe they're missing a third person, maybe it's because Alice is an introvert and Garrett is an extrovert. I'm not sure. We've been trying to figure it out ever since they joined us, but bottom line, they're not hurting anyone and they're happy."

"Are Garrett and Bella still…" I trailed off. I didn't even want to ask, but I needed to.

"I shouldn't be answering this," Carlisle said, "but I can tell that you need to know and the answer is no, they're not."

Well that was a relief.

"You're probably not going to like this," Carlisle said, "but since you're here I may as well check your chest again and see how it's healing."

I let out a groan, but pulled off my shirt regardless. I noted that it was getting easier.

I watched Carlisle as he looked at my chest. I looked down too and I had some new bruises from my run-in with the tree, but thankfully there was no blood or new wounds. Carlisle was being so gentle with me and he made me feel at ease. He had been so forthcoming and although I had even more questions now than answers I was confident about one thing, Garrett wasn't playing a game with the Cullens, only me, and I didn't know how I felt about that just yet. Was it because of his relationship with Bella? Because he didn't match up perfectly with Alice? Because he was suffering from PTSD? I wasn't sure, but I was going to figure it out, I was going to figure it all out.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N- **You guys are the best, really

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

Two days, it had been two days since I confronted Bella about her relationship with Garrett and she had ran from me. I turned up to school the next day and she was nowhere to be seen, nor was Alice. I had no doubt that Bella had convinced Alice to stay home or perhaps go on a hunting trip and I was almost thankful for that. Alice was too easy to manipulate and I had no doubt that she would tell me everything I needed to know and her opinion is the one that really mattered in this, but I knew better. I needed to hear Bella's story first especially if she was my mate like I suspected.

I still wasn't upset with Bella. Carlisle knew and apparently they voted on it, so Bella and Garrett's illicit relationship couldn't be for a bad reason. I just wanted to know why and I wanted to make sure that Alice wasn't just a pawn in Garrett's game. I knew Alice cared for him, I could sense that when I was talking to her, but I really wanted to observe them together, so I could get a better feel for them and maybe even figure out what they're missing.

I didn't bother to sit with the Cullens without Bella there. Edward would be reading my mind, Emmett would be… Whatever the hell he does, and Rose would be supportive, or she would side with Bella, either way it was best to be avoided. My regular lunch group wasn't much better, all the boys wanted to see my stitches and all the girls kept on asking if I was okay. It was hell, but what could I do. I could have tried sitting alone, but I knew that either one of the Cullen's or my human friends would have simply sat with me, so it wasn't worth it.

My chin was fine. The bruise was already turning a weird purple/yellow color, so it didn't look the best, but it was fine. The stitches hadn't pulled apart and it was healing nicely. The only problem was that it hurt to talk, so I of course used that as an excuse to basically become a recluse. Thankfully everyone understood, even the teachers. Seth had called Thursday night and asked how I was. I smiled at the memory, I had definitely picked my new friend well. Back in Texas Peter and I were thick as thieves and although I was enjoying the break from Pete's negative emotions I had missed the fundamentals; having that one person to do stuff with… like spy on a vampire hunting animals. I needed to call Peter soon and check in on him.

On Friday night Jacob came around with my truck and it looked as good as the day I got it. I thanked him for it and listened to him as he told me in great length what he had done to fix it. Jacob had come not only with my truck, but with a warning from his father. Jacob thought it was stupid and he didn't even know the importance of what he was telling me, but Billy had warned me to pick a side or there would be consequences. Jacob apologized profusely, but I just brushed him off. I knew that with Seth being a potential wolf it could bring complications, but it's not like he was a wolf yet, so I didn't need to make my decision right now.

Saturday came and Charlie knew I was going to Seattle today. I hadn't heard from Bella so I doubted she was still coming with me, but that wouldn't stop me.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with?" Charlie asked.

"No, dad," I said, "you've got your fishing trip, go, enjoy. I will be fine."

"Do I need to remind you that you split your chin open on a tree?" Charlie asked and I grimaced. No, he did not, the constant pain was enough of a reminder, thank you very much.

"Didn't you say you were going with Bella Cullen?" Charlie asked next.

"Yeah, but I haven't seen her since Wednesday, so I'm not sure we're still on. I think I'll just go alone."

"Jasper, Seattle is a lot bigger than Forks."

"I know, but Houston is like a million times bigger than Seattle. I'll be fine, Dad, I know what I'm doing."

"I just wish you weren't going alone," he said.

"Okay," I gave in, "I promise I won't go alone. If Bella flakes and I can't find someone I won't go, or I'll just go to Port Angeles, okay?"

"Okay," he accepted. "I've gotta go before the fish go back to sleep."

I waited fifteen minutes after Charlie left before going out to my truck. I didn't care what I had told Charlie, I had been planning this trip for too long not to go. Forks was too small at times, I needed to get out and Seattle would be perfect for that. I unlocked my truck and jumped inside. I let out a sigh, it was so good to have wheels again. No more replying on Charlie, no more bike fantasies about Bella… Okay, so there was still going to be that.

I wished Bella would stop avoiding me so we could hash this out already. If I knew where she lived I would have already tracked her down, but my brain had chosen now to act afraid. There was just something about storming into a houseful of vampires unprepared that filled me with dread. Maybe my self-preservation was finally returning.

I was just about to start my truck when I heard the passenger side door open and close. I looked to my right and there was Bella. I glared at her, I couldn't help it.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, wincing in pain. I didn't miss her flash of concern for me.

"We had plans," she said, "to go to Seattle."

"I remember, but I haven't seen you in two days, and the way we left things…" I trailed off. I didn't know how to proceed. My heart was saying forgive, but my head was telling me to make her beg for it.

"Look I'm sorry about how I handled things," she said, "and I'm sorry for avoiding you, but I needed time."

"To do what?" I asked, looking deep into her golden eyes. I was trying to figure out how she was feeling, but I was getting nothing.

"Process."

"Process what, Isabella? You're giving me nothing here." I could feel her hurt at my casual use of her full name.

"I needed to process the fact that you're my mate." Okay, so I wasn't expecting that at all. "Seeing you hurt, how you ignored your pain to stand up for Seth, smelling your blood again, things just clicked into place," Bella looked at me nervously. "So?" she asked when I didn't say anything.

"So what?" I asked. "I already know you're my mate." Well I wasn't a hundred per cent sure on it, but now I was. Bella was shocked.

"How?" she asked.

"You're a vampire," I said simply, "I should be running the other way, avoiding you and your family at all costs, but I'm not. I'm drawn to you and I know that I care for you deeply."

"Oh," she said lamely.

"Tell me about Garrett," I pressed.

She sighed. "What do you want to know?"

"Switch with me," I said.

"What?" she asked confused.

"Switch with me," I repeated, unbuckling my seatbelt. "We can't just sit here. I want to go to Seattle and if you drive we can keep talking."

She could see that I was right and we switched seats. I put my seatbelt back on and she started my truck, pulling away from the house.

"Tell me about Garrett," I repeated. "Your story. I'm not going to prompt you or ask any questions, just tell me what you want me to know."

"Okay," she said, but she didn't say anything. I could tell she was nervous, so I just waited for her to be ready.

"We're no longer fucking each other," she said once we had left Forks and it was good to hear it from her and not just Carlisle. "I don't know when it started, or how…" she trailed off.

I knew she was lying, surely vampire brains came with good memory. I stayed silent and so did she.

"Alice couldn't give Garrett what he needed," Bella said, "she couldn't feed his beast and it kept on coming out. I was slipping." I noticed that Bella was driving way above the speed limit, but I was confident in her skills, so I didn't mention it. "I was slipping," she repeated. "I spent close to twenty years with Edward and then he was suddenly with Carlisle and not me. I stuck to Rose and Em, but it wasn't enough. It was hard for me to accept that Edward was no longer mine and that he never really was. Alice and Garrett joined us in 1950 and things just intensified. Everyone was mated and I was on the outs…

"I needed that connection, I craved it. I was about to go out on my own, maybe switch up my diet, snack on humans for a while. Emmett was actually the one who suggested that Garrett and I use each other for release. I was against it at first, most of us were. He was mated to Alice and it just didn't seem right to me, it wasn't fair. I had been there and done that with Edward and Carlisle and I didn't want to do it again. Emmett explained why it would work and I still don't know how he understood the situation so well. He made several good points; the fact that Garrett not only thrived on blood for so long, but also sex, the fact that I was essentially a repressed virgin and beyond ready to overcome that…

"We all came around to it, everyone but Alice. It was hard for her. She doesn't remember her human life, so it's just, she constantly feels as though she's not acting like herself because she doesn't remember who she was. We've tried to find someone from her past, but all her family is dead and as she doesn't remember anything it's hard. She's not even sure her name's Alice, she thinks it sounds right, but the doubt is there. That's why she relies on her visions so much, because she can be sure of them. Once we made the decision to give it a go the future changed and she saw it all. Garrett's beast would be satiated enough for him to live successfully with the Cullens and I would no longer run…

"Even when it was accepted by everyone, Garrett and I struggled with it. We both didn't want to betray Alice, we knew we had her blessing, but it was tough. The first time, we just decided to give it a try and it was awkward as fuck, but we couldn't deny that it was what we both needed. After that we thought we were fixed, we went months without having sex. We were foolish, living a lie, denying ourselves one of our basic instincts. Garrett almost slaughtered a busload of children and I found myself thinking I was worthless. I was going to go to the Volturi and commit suicide. It didn't come to that. Carlisle could see we were slipping and we were force together and once again it calmed us down…

"There was a lot of trial and error, but we found exactly how long we could go without each other. Sometimes we pushed it, but everyone learned the signs, so it never got that bad again. It was once every two or three months. Sometimes more often, sometimes less. There were periods of time where Garrett and Alice got along well and there was no need for me, and there were times where Edward and Carlisle had a fight so Edward sought me out for friendship and that seemed to calm me down. Then there were the opposite. Alice and Garrett wouldn't be getting along, so he would need me, and for me, it was mainly just my thoughts getting the better of me, the feeling of worthlessness mainly, but Garrett was always there for me. We kept each other afloat…

"Four months ago was the last time we had sex. We were nearing needing each other when you came to town. You distracted me, you made me start to second guess certain things, you irritated me and I loved it. I calmed down to the point where I found I didn't need Garrett anymore… It wasn't that I didn't need him, because I still have my needs, but I didn't want him anymore, I wanted you and only you. You had me thinking, questioning, and just living… You made me want to live again. I was hopeful for the first time since losing Edward's affection. Garrett on the other hand, he's been slipping…

"Garrett and I sat down not too long ago and hashed things out. He's happy for me and you, he is. He actually confided in me about the Alice situation, now more than ever he wants to fix it. He wants to find what's keeping them apart and move forward. I think him seeing me find you and how much it's changed me for the better is showing him that there's hope for him too. Finding what he's missing is the hard part though. We've all tried thinking of anything and everything, but no luck. Emmett suggested asking you, but of course we couldn't do that without you knowing all the facts. He thinks a fresh perspective is all we need and we've all noticed that you have this uncanny ability to just understand everything."

Bella said no more and I just sat there dumbfounded, staring at her. I didn't expect that much detail. I thought she would lie, avoid the topic, keep me in the dark for as long as possible, but none of that happened. She had surprised me and that was a first. I didn't know what to say or even where to start. Everything made sense; the reason Garrett and Bella sought each other out, the fact that it was only because they needed it and that there was no real feelings between them. I felt like my brain was going to explode. It just, I couldn't comprehend it all, it was information overload.

"So what are we doing in Seattle?" Bella asked like she hadn't just fucking revealed the secrets of the universe to me.

I looked away from her and noticed that we were already in the city. How and when did that happen?

"Jasper?" Bella asked. "Are you okay?"


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N- **Thank you for taking the time to leave me a review

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 13 + 14**

"_Jasper?" Bella asked. "Are you okay?"_

"Take me to a bookstore," I said simply.

"Jasper," Bella started, but I cut her off.

"I'm not a vampire," I told her, "it's going to take me a while to process this."

"Okay." I could feel her understanding. "Can you at least give me something?"

Where did I even begin?

"I understand why you did it, but one thing confuses me," I said. "You said you were with Edward for twenty years, but that doesn't line up with how I've witnessed you with him. You're too close, it just doesn't make sense."

"Oh," Bella said. "Edward and I dated, but we never had sex or fucked, it never felt right and I'm glad we didn't. With Garrett, I had no feelings for him so it was easier to let him have my body because he didn't have my mind. Do you understand?"

"Yeah," I said, thinking about Maria. She had both my mind and my body, but at different times, so I understood the difference completely.

"Why do you need to go to the bookstore?" Bella asked, parking my truck and turning to me.

"Simple," I said, getting out. "Books hold information and I need information."

"About what? If it's to do with my family you can just ask me."

"I know that, Bella, but what I need you don't know otherwise you wouldn't need me."

Even Bella's vampire brain took a second to decipher that poorly constructed sentence.

"So this is about Garrett and Alice?" she asked.

"Mainly Garrett, but yes. Did he ever tell you about the second time we met?" I asked, leading the way into the bookstore and looking for the psychology section. I wanted to find a book on PTSD as I knew Garrett must be suffering from it.

"In the forest?" she asked. So much for no secrets.

I wondered whether or not I should tell Bella. Nothing much happened in Port Angeles, so it wasn't vital. I stopped and looked into Bella's golden eyes. I could tell that she was silently telling me that I could trust her, but this had nothing to do with trust. I was more worried about Bella interfering with my plans and making those plans known to Garrett. But then again she was my mate and I didn't want to keep secrets from her.

"No, Port Angeles," I said.

"What happened?" she demanded. I stepped away from her and continued to the psychology section.

"Nothing happened," I told her. "He was just playing around with me, I'm still figuring out why, but he seemed awfully focused on Alice's visions of me and that fact that I wouldn't survive whatever's coming. It makes sense though, I'm a human and you're a vampire that can't work forever and maybe not surviving simply means becoming a vampire."

"Maybe you're right," Bella said and I could feel some deceit, she was lying, but about what? So much for being honest with her, it only worked if it went both ways. I decided to take a guess at what she was lying about.

"I think it's a choice I've made," I said, finally finding the section I needed. I stopped and began scanning the titles. "There's a huge risk with being involved with you. It can only ever end in two ways, either in death or in change. I know what I want, I would like to become a vampire -"

"You don't know anything about it," Bella said. "You don't know what you're agreeing to."

"Then tell me," I said simply, pulling out a book before putting it back.

"It burns, so bad," she said quietly. "It's the worst pain I've ever felt. Right before Carlisle changed me I was in a motorcycle accident, I broke almost every bone in my body, but the pain of the change was a million times worse. I couldn't knowingly put anyone through that, Jasper, and least of all you."

I wasn't even going to touch that one.

"Come with me," I said as I grabbed the first book I found on PTSD and grabbed Bella's arm, pulling her towards the front. I quickly paid, still holding onto her arm. When I had the book I pulled Bella outside and back to my truck.

"What are you doing?" she asked when we were seated inside.

I didn't say anything, I just started up my truck and pulled onto the road. I needed to find somewhere quiet, somewhere secluded. I knew Bella was confused, but I didn't bother to fill her in. She could wait. I pulled into an alley that looked empty and turned off my truck, facing Bella.

"What's going on?" she asked and she almost seemed scared. What had happened to the feisty vampire I had met?

I didn't hesitate. I undid my seatbelt and pulled off my shirt. I kept my eyes locked on Bella as my scarred chest came into her view. I tried to work out how she was feeling, but it was too hard. I tried to rely on her facial expressions, but she was keeping it blank.

"I know pain, Bella," I said. "I know it well. Going through the change for you will be worth it, trust me on that."

"Who did this to you?" she asked, still keeping everything blocked from me. "Were they a vampire? Is that why you're so accepting of all this?"

"No, they were human."

"Who, Jasper? Tell me," Bella growled.

"I'm not going to do that," I told her and she growled louder. "As I said, they're human, so it wouldn't be a fair fight."

"I don't care about that, they hurt you so I will hurt them."

I laughed, I had to.

"So does that mean I get to hurt Carlisle and Edward for hurting you?" I asked and she starting huffing.

"That's different," she said.

"Really? How so? They hurt you, Bella, Carlisle attempted to manipulate you and Edward went along with it because it was simpler for them to use you then for them to fucking grow up and accept each other. But just like Garrett I can understand why things went the way they did, but you can't go after my tormentor unless I can go after yours."

She knew I was right, but she didn't like it. I reached out and traced her face, she felt so cold and hard, yet soft at the same time. She leaned into my touch.

"We both have our pasts, Bella," I said gently, "but that's what they are, they're in the past and unless they show up again they do not concern us."

"You feel so warm," Bella said, closing her eyes. She felt so content which was a first from her. I basked in it.

Her eyes suddenly flashed open and before I had time to process it she had pulled me to her before straddling my hips. I felt trapped, but I didn't let her know. She looked down at my scars and I could feel the love again, but this time I was certain it was coming from her and that it was directed towards me. It wasn't the biggest love I had ever felt, but I knew that it would only grow with time. Bella reached out with her cold hands and began tracing my scars.

"Do they bother you?" she asked, still looking at them.

"I don't know," I answered honestly, "sometimes, but I've gotten used to them now."

"It doesn't have to be forever." I think I heard her say, but it was hard to tell because she was mumbling. I decided not to mention it. Her touch was too good and I didn't want to do anything that would have her pulling away from me.

"I still want to kill whoever did this to you," she admitted.

"I would be upset if you didn't," I told her. "It shows that you care for me, Bella, and that's a good thing because I care for you too."

"How much?" she asked, insecurities shining through.

"I love you," I said simply and she looked at me for a moment.

"You really do, don't you?" she said. "It's like I can feel it. I'm the world's best predator, everything about me is supposed to invite you in, my voice, my face, my scent… But you've never been drawn to any of that. You're different from the other humans and I don't think it's just because of your scars and how you got them. I always feel at ease with you, safe, which is impossible as I've spent so long closing myself up to protect myself from hurt. Yet here I am. I've willingly given you my heart and it would be so easy for you to crush it like everyone else, but I know that you won't. I don't know how I know, but I know…

"I'm so much stronger than you, faster, you would never stand a chance… Why do I feel weaker than you? It makes no sense," Bella started rambling. I tried to follow along the best that I could, but it was hard. "You've never been afraid of me, everyone always is. They are drawn to our beauty, but they always keep their distance, but not you. I've scented your blood twice now and I've never wanted it."

"Three times," I told her and she glared at me.

"I don't like to think about that," she said, turning her head from me.

"Why?" I asked. I knew exactly why, but I wanted to hear her say it.

"Do you know how demoralizing it is to have someone else save your mate when you're perfectly capable of doing it yourself?" I did, Peter had saved me from Maria in the end, but I didn't say anything as I greedily wanted more information from Bella. "We all had time to save you from the van, but Rose was the only one that did. I know she did it for me, but I hate that I never even tried… I was going to let you die. Nobody said anything, but I could tell they were upset with me. Alice had already told us that you were important… I was just punishing myself, I didn't want you to leave me. I thought it would be easier to just let you die, but I was wrong, so wrong."

"Don't beat yourself up about it, Bella, I don't blame you at all," I said.

"You should."

"I was saved and I'm still alive today and that's all that matters." I let out a breath, this was getting us nowhere. "How fast can you get us back to Forks?" I asked.

"I thought we were going to the zoo," she said and she almost sounded disappointed.

"I just want to go home," I told her.

"Well we'll have to stick to the roads, but if you're not worried about leaving your truck we could run."

Run?

"I'm not leaving my truck here," I said firmly. I had only just gotten it back.

"Relax," Bella said. "Someone from my family will surely be near Seattle, so I'll get them to pick it up for you and drive it back."

And then we'd run?

"How much faster is it?" I asked.

Bella slid off my lap and I pulled my shirt back on.

"With your truck? At least double, if not triple."

Okay, so that was fast.

"Plus we don't need to stick to the roads or avoid traffic," she said.

Well I was definitely intrigued.

"Okay," I accepted.

I watched as Bella sent off a message to one of her family members.

I searched the backseat for my backpack and put my newly purchased book in there. I didn't know when I would get my truck back so I wanted to have it on me.

"Are you ready?" Bella asked me. I nodded my head and jumped out of the truck, locking it up. I went to hand Bella the keys, but she stopped me. "They don't need them," she said.

Okay then. I put the keys in my pocket and put my backpack on. I wasn't sure how we were going to run back, I knew I wouldn't be the one running, but I waited for Bella's instructions.

"Jump on," Bella said, bending her knees. I looked at her back, it seemed so wrong. I was heavier than her, surely I'd squash her. Ah, fuck it. I walked over to Bella and jumped on her back, she didn't even falter. I liked that she was strong. I also liked that I had to wrap my legs tightly around her. It was good being this flush against Bella, I just wish I was in front of her and not behind, but that would come later.

Bella started running and I was so amazed. She picked up her speed and it soon became too much for me. Everything was going by way too fast and it was making me woozy. I dropped my head to Bella's shoulder and focused on looking at her back and not the fact that we were hurtling through the forest at breakneck speed. It worked to a degree, but my mind still wandered, so I focused on my closeness to Bella instead. I wrapped my legs and arms tighter around her. It felt good being this close to her. I imagined just how good it would be if I was front facing. My lust overtook me and Bella faltered. Hmm, did I do that? I decided it would be safer to reel my lust in. I didn't want Bella tripping. I kept on feeling what I was, but I made a point of not letting it get away from me.

We arrived much sooner than I expected and Bella slowly helped me down. I was a little disorientated, but focusing on Bella had done its job. The moment I knew left from right I grabbed Bella's hand and led her into the house. I listened hard, but there was no noise. Charlie was still out, good.

"What are you doing?" Bella asked as I led her upstairs and into my bedroom.

"I need you," I told her, kicking my door shut behind me and pulling my shirt off. "I want you," I said as I began stalking her.

Bella stepped back until she hit my bed and stopped, she was trapped.

"Jasper, I'm not sure this is a good idea," she said.

"Bella, just feel," I told her, allowing my lust to return and get away from me. Oh yeah, she definitely felt something. I kept it up, making a point of pushing it out of me and into her. She lost her senses and fell back on to the bed. I approached her and she scooted back away from me. I didn't let her get too far before I lay on top of her, letting my whole body be flush with hers. I knew she could easily get out, but she never did, so I continued on.

I pulled at her shirt until she gave in and took it off herself, now we were getting someone. I bent down and started kissing her. I loved the feeling of my scarred chest on her ice cold one, it was so soothing and it just felt right. I deepened the kiss as soon as she let me and we fought for dominance. I let her win, I could tell that she needed it. I pulled back and started sucking on her neck. It was instinctual and Bella seemed to love it. She let out a low growl before it turned into a purr. I knew I was doing something right so I kept it up. I started moving lower just wanting more of her, I wanted everything. I made it to her covered breasts. I wanted to tease her, but I wasn't sure how. I hovered right above her right breast and she let out a groan. I smiled, I was doing well. I pulled away, wanting to kiss her lips again, but Bella used her speed and strength to wrap her fingers in my hair and keep me where she wanted me.

"Oh, god," someone said and I let out a groan of my own.

I turned and looked at who had disturbed us. It was Charlie, great, I let out another groan.

"Charlie, shouldn't you knock?" I asked.

"Umm, yeah, but your truck wasn't here and... Look, I'm just going to go… Bella it was good seeing you again, no, not that, umm, dammit, Jasper. I didn't have this problem before you moved here," I heard Charlie mutter as he left us alone and I let out a laugh.

Bella glared at me frustrated. This wasn't my fault, she was the one with vampire hearing after all. I guess I was just so good that she could only focus on me… Okay, I was suddenly glad she wasn't a mind reader.

"To be continued," I told her, disentangling our limbs.

Bella let out a growl, she was definitely not happy with that at all. Oh well, she'd survive.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N- **Thank you to everyone who took the time to review, it was much appreciated

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 15 + 16**

The muted light of yet another day woke me and I moved my arm to cover my eyes. Last night had been less than ideal. Charlie had busted in on me making out with Bella and he wasn't happy about it at all. After she left he sat me down and lectured me. Not only did he give me the safe sex talk, but he proceeded to tell me all the reasons why I was too young to steal Bella's gift. I didn't have the heart to tell him that neither Bella nor I were no longer pure. I just sat there and took it because I could tell that Charlie was getting some odd sense of satisfaction out of parenting me. It was embarrassing of course, but he needed this. In the end I agreed to no more misbehaving in this house. It was easy to agree to because I knew that in the end Bella and I didn't need to be here to get physical, we could be anywhere.

I heard a noise and I pulled my arm away from my eyes. Bella was sitting across from my bed just staring at me, smirking.

"'Tis not nice to watch people sleep," I mumbled. "'Tis fucking creepy actually." Bella laughed, but didn't speak. "Why are you here?" I asked. "'Tis early, too early. I know you don't sleep, but I do, so leave." More silence. "Please tell me that you haven't been here all night," I grumbled pulling the covers over my head. I didn't like the thought of Bella watching me sleep all night.

"No, of course not," she said, sounding offended. "As you know, I don't sleep, no one in my family does and because I was stupid enough to tell them that you would be coming over today… well, let's just say that they forced me to come over and retrieve you as soon as possible."

"Really?" …Fucking weirdos.

"It is what it is, Jasper."

Great, a fucking riddle, it was too early for this shit.

"Why are you all the way over there?" I asked, my head still covered.

"Because you told your father that we wouldn't do anything in this house." So? "And I'm not going to let you manipulate me again… make me lose all of my senses. I should have noticed that he was home, I should have heard him, smelled him, something, but no, you, Jasper Whitlock, have consumed me fully and I don't know if that's a good thing."

Well it was definitely too heavy for all this so early in the morning, maybe I should just stay in bed.

"Hurry up and get ready," Bella said firmly, "or my family will bring this little get together here and trust me when I say that you don't want that."

"Fine," I groaned, finally getting out of bed. "Can you at least tell me what I'm getting myself into?"

"No," Bella said, "just hurry up."

I did as I was told and I got ready for a day with Bella's family. I was looking forward to it, but now I was realizing the full extent of what I was getting myself into. I was willingly walking into unfamiliar territory where seven vampires lived, one of which may or may not be out to get me. I knew it was unwise, but I trusted Bella fully and I found that I wanted to observe them all more than anything. I really was a curious person, but it had gotten me into more trouble than it was worth. Still, I didn't care. I reappeared and we left the house. Bella drove us and I started to run through all the possible scenarios, but I knew it was pointless as there was no way I'd be able to predict what would happen.

The house we pulled up to was not what I expected at all, but I didn't say a word. I was more concerned with what was inside. I could sense several vampires, but there were too many to figure out who was here and who wasn't. According to Bella, they were anxious to meet me so I assumed that everyone was here, even Garrett. We stepped inside and I liked that it was wide and open. The only vampires to greet us were Carlisle and Edward, now I knew that Carlisle was like a father to them all, but did that mean Edward was their other parent, or was he still a son? I had no idea.

My eyes went from Edward straight back to Carlisle. His youth and his outrageous perfection sucked me in. He was too beautiful and I felt bad for even looking at him. Edward chuckled, but I didn't even bother to look away from his mate. Edward started growling and Carlisle quickly berated him. I looked at Edward and he had his head cast downwards. Yes, Edward definitely thought of Carlisle as more of a parental figure than his equal, but as they were happily in love who was I to judge. I was drawn back to Carlisle. This was the first time I had seen him in casual clothes and I soon realized that no matter what he was wearing he was still fucking hot.

"That's it," Edward said, snapping. He jumped in front of me and grabbed me by my throat. I did my best to smirk back at him and he didn't like that at all. I could feel Bella's amusement, small amount of fear, and her pride. I knew she wouldn't help me get out of this one.

"Edward, that's enough," Carlisle said, but Edward didn't let me go. He was staring me down.

_What's your end game here_? I asked Edward mentally. _You kill me, and then what_? _Bella won't be too happy with you, Daddy Carlisle won't either_. He growled louder and his grip tightened. _I guess it's okay, you kill me, Bella changes me and then when you're off hunting or something I can keep Carlisle company… Bella and I can keep him company. It's okay, Edward, it'll all work out. Living or dead I will get a piece of him_. Edward growled one last time before letting me go. I staggered backwards, grabbing my throat, my eyes never leaving his.

"I know you're lying," Edward said calmly. "I don't know why you think the things that you do, but I know you're lying."

He wasn't wrong. I would never have Carlisle, but Edward was just too easy to tease.

"What was that all about?" Carlisle asked.

"Edward was just welcoming me to the family," I said, rubbing my throat. It was a little sore, but I was fine. "So where's everyone else?"

"Right this way," Carlisle said, leading us through a door. I watched as Edward followed him excitedly, his love shining brightly. I wasn't concerned with their relationship at all, only Alice and Garrett's.

We walked into a grand living room and I stopped just inside the door. My eyes landed on Alice and Garrett and they shocked me. They were sitting in the corner, Garrett behind Alice, his arms wrapped tightly around her. They looked just as in love as Carlisle and Edward, but that's just it, they looked; looks can be deceiving. It's what I was currently sensing from them that had me worried, simply put, they were incompatible. They didn't match up. Carlisle and Edward, Rose and Emmett, heck, even Bella and I, we were each other's equals, but Alice and Garrett were far from that. She was shy, he was over confident, she was soft spoken, he was outspoken, he was a lion and she was a lamb. It's true, opposites can attract, but these two were so far apart emotionally that it just wasn't possible.

"What is it?" Bella asked concerned and everyone looked at me. "What do you see?"

"Shield us," I said to Bella and she looked at me so oddly. Yes, she was a mental shield, but I had felt its strength, it was separate from Bella's own, so I had just assumed that it could be manipulated away from her… It was two separate things. Maybe she had never had a need to discover it before, to use it, maybe I was wrong... "Do you trust me?" I asked her.

"No," she said firmly, she was lying.

I reached out anyway and grabbed her forearm. I focused on what I believed to be the strength of her shield and I tried to pull it towards me. Bella fought it at first, but I didn't give in. I kept on pulling it until it left her body and came around me as well. Bella must have figured it out because I let go of it and it still stayed around me.

"What is this?" she asked.

"Your shield."

"How did you know it was there?" She was feeling amazed.

"I don't know. I could sense it and I just guessed. I figured you would have already discovered it, but I guess you never had a reason to."

"What does it do?" she asked.

"It's your shield," I answered back, "but I assume it blocks us from the others."

I turned around and every single vampire was looking at us shocked and confused. Emmett even seemed murderous, I bet he thought I was hurting Bella.

"Don't worry about him," Bella said and I turned back to her. "Alice had a vision of some visitors coming soon and everyone's on edge. It's why I suggested this. You need to be comfortable around all of us just in case."

"In case of what?" I asked. "Who are these visitors? Vampires?"

"Yes, but they aren't like us, they're human drinkers. We don't know them, it's an added unknown. Alice is certain they're just passing through, but we need to be prepared regardless and part of that is making sure that you're not out of my sight until they're gone."

Ah, now everything was starting to make sense. Bella was scared for me, scared of losing me.

"This is the one place we don't have to hide," Bella said, "and we're not about to give that up without a fight."

"Okay."

"Okay?" Bella questioned outraged.

"I'm still processing this," I said, and I was. Unknown vampires, human drinkers, what if they got to Charlie, or Seth, what if they hurt Bella and the Cullens? It was just too much to process. "Who's older?" I asked trying to get the conversation back on track. "Carlisle or Garrett?"

"Carlisle, why?"

"By how much?"

"A century," Bella answered. "Carlisle's over three hundred and fifty years old and Garrett's about two hundred and twenty."

Hmm, I guess the war must have aged Garrett because he definitely seemed older than Carlisle to me.

"What did you see what you looked at Alice and Garrett?" Bella asked.

"I don't know much about how mates work," I said, "but they're not compatible, not with how they are right now."

"What does that mean?" Bella asked.

"I don't know." There were too many options, too many possibilities and I didn't want to make any assumptions. "But if they believe they're mated then I will figure it out," I said confidently. I owed this family at least that much for basically accepting me as one of their own. "Can you let me out of your shield yet?" I asked. "It's a little unsettling being cut off from everything and I did technically come here to interact with your family."

Bella scrunched up her face, trying to pull her shield back, it took a moment, but she finally got it.

"It'll become easier the more you use it," I told her and she looked at me oddly.

"What was that?" Emmett asked.

"What was what?" I said, stepping away from Bella and sitting down on the couch. It was so weird to go from feeling only Bella to feeling and hearing everyone, it was exhausting.

"Apparently I have a physical shield too, I didn't even know," Bella said.

"Jasper knew," Emmett said, crossing his arms. "How did he know when we didn't? When you didn't?"

All eyes fell on me and I could tell that a simple shrug of the shoulders wouldn't work here.

"I could feel it," I said, but apparently that wasn't an acceptable answer either. "It has a strength, different from Bella's. I guessed she could extend it and I was right."

"You seem to guess a lot," Emmett said and I knew he was only looking out for his family, "and you're usually right."

"So?" I questioned.

"So what's your gift?" he demanded.

"Gift? I'm not a vampire, remember?"

"Yes, but gifts transfer over from your human life, so what's yours?"

"I can…" I trailed off. I didn't like to admit this to anyone, but I knew I needed to. "I can sense others, feel what they're feeling and lately I think I can make others feel certain emotions. I always assumed I was just perceptive, but now knowing that Edward can read minds I'm not sure."

"Yes," Alice said, her loud voice surprising me. She was still sitting in the corner with Garrett and they still looked happily mated.

"What is it, love?" Garrett asked and once again there it was, they looked fine, but emotions don't lie.

"There's going to be a thunderstorm tonight."

"Yes," all of the male vampires rejoiced. What was going on?

"It's been so long since we played ball," Emmett said. "You are all going down."

"Oh, come on," Edward said. "It's a team sport, Emmett, remembered that. …Geez, I hope I'm not stuck on your team again."

"Play ball?" I questioned.

"Baseball," Bella told me.

I loved baseball.

"Am I allowed to play?" I asked.

"You want to play with a bunch of vampires?" Emmett scoffed. "You'll never be able to keep up."

"Just watch me," I said and Rose smirked.

"Yeah," Rose said, "Jasper's given us no reason to discount him yet, so why would he start now."

Yes, thank you Rose.

"We'll have to wait for the thunder," Alice said, "but I see no issue with Jasper being there."

Good. It had been far too long since I played baseball.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N- **Thank you so much to those of you who took the time to review, you guys are awesome

Enjoy

* * *

**Chapter 17 + 18**

I stayed at the Cullens. Everyone seemed excited for the approaching baseball game and it was infectious. Even Garrett who I assumed wouldn't want any part of this was beaming. He couldn't keep his arms off Alice and she seemed so happy that he was happy. It was definitely odd. Emmett and Rose had gone upstairs to do the unimaginable. I was just thankful I didn't have super vampire hearing because I did not need to hear that. It was bad enough that Bella cringed every five minutes. Yes, I definitely didn't want to know what they were up to. At least Carlisle and Edward were a good distraction. Edward kept on trying to bait Carlisle, but he wasn't having any part of it. Edward would get frustrated and Carlisle would be amused and it annoyed Edward to no end. They definitely seemed to have two parts to their relationship, lovers and father and son, but it worked well for them. I smiled.

"Why are you always thinking so hard?" Bella asked me and I turned to look at her.

"Well someone has to," I joked back and she smiled at me. I could feel her love for me and it was so grand. I felt so lucky to have found her. I didn't even care that she was a vampire, I think that actually drew me in more. I knew she was strong. She had seen so much, but she had chosen me and that made me feel special. Maria only ever wanted me because I was weak and easily manipulated, but Bella wanted me for me. No tricks, just me.

"I wish I could read your mind," Bella said reaching out to push my hair off my face.

"You really don't," Edward said, stopping his teasing of Carlisle for a moment. "His mind is a confusing minefield," Edward said. "Too many thoughts and not enough substance."

Well that was nice, not, thanks Edward for the backhanded compliment there.

"Your thoughts have no substance?" Bella cooed after Edward went back to annoying Carlisle.

I could feel Garrett watching me, but I paid him no attention.

"Maybe the person reading my thoughts isn't smart enough to see the true meaning behind them," I said and Edward growled back. Garrett laughed at my comment and I looked up at him. Garrett was looking at me critically and I couldn't work out why. I sensed his feelings and he seemed scared, small and determined, all on top of his usual confidence and strength. Garrett was definitely thinking hard about something, but as it didn't concern me I didn't worry about it.

"It's time," Alice said and the room started buzzing.

"I'll take the human, the rest of you can run," Emmett said with some not so hidden meaning, though exactly what he was up to wasn't entirely clear to me.

Bella looked at me.

"Do you feel safe with Emmett?" she asked. I looked at Emmett, yes he was big and unpredictable, but I wasn't afraid of him. I nodded my head. "Good, I'll see you out there."

I wondered why they were running when they could just ride with us.

"We don't like to be caged in," Emmett said as we watched the others grab the supplies and run out the back, bounding over the river. "We like to run free."

That was understandable.

"So what's this all about?" I asked as Emmett led me to the garage and we basically got into a monster truck, it was huge.

"Can't I get to know my new brother?" Emmett asked. He was definitely up to something.

"Sure, brother," I called him back and he reacted negatively to that before brushing it off. He didn't say anything and I sighed. "Emmett, I don't like to waste time, just say your piece and be done with it."

"I don't trust you," he said simply. "You're too smart and I don't like it. How could you even know that Bella had a shield when she's never even exhibited that before today? You're not human, you can't be."

"Emmett, I'm smart, that's it. I'm observant. I wasn't lying, I felt the strength of her shield and I could tell it was separate. I took a guess… That's what makes me different, I make valid assumptions and I see them out. I could have easily dismissed the foreign strength I felt, but I didn't. That's just not me. I know you trust in me and my abilities. Bella told me that you suggested I be brought in on the Alice/Garrett situation."

"And?" he said, cutting me off.

"There incompatible," I answered.

"What does that mean?" Emmett asked.

"I have an idea, but I need to think it out some more first."

"Bella's right, you think too much, but I think that's a good thing. Now, if you ever hurt Bella you know I will hurt you right?"

"Of course," I answered. I expect nothing less from her family.

"Good. …You are so going down tonight. You could never keep up with vampires," Emmett boasted.

"We'll see," I said confidently. I knew I couldn't be as fast as them, but I could definitely be smarter than them.

We came to the end of the road and it was dead end. Emmett was feeling too much joy right now for this to be a good thing.

"We have to go on foot from here," Emmett said gleefully as we got out of the Jeep.

"Why are you so happy?" I asked, a simple walk wouldn't cause this kind of reaction.

"We're going to have to run and seeing as you're human, slow and clumsy, I'm going to have to run with you. I know you'd probably rather it be Carlisle holding you, but I'm just going to have to do."

I looked up at him and he was smirking at me.

"I'm not gay," I told him.

"Tell that to Edward and Carlisle," Emmett said. "You know that Carlisle can feel your attraction to him right?"

Oh great. Having Edward read my mind was one thing, but to have Carlisle sense my lust was a whole other thing.

"He must have a gift," I protested. "There's no way all of you would be drawn to Carlisle and stay with him for this long, sire or not, he must have a gift."

"You better watch it," Emmett said. "Your smarts are going to get you into trouble sooner or later. Let's just get this over and done with. I don't want to feel your scrawny ass with my hands any more than you do."

My eye involuntarily twitched at Emmett's scrawny comment and my mouth clamped shut. I knew there was no point getting into this with him, not when we were all alone in the middle of nowhere, or when I knew that Emmett wouldn't listen to me. It just wasn't worth it. I hated that a simple word could make me feel so down. I wondered if when I became a vampire I would feel differently. Surely I would, surely the strength would outweigh all the negative thoughts I had… I wasn't sure.

"How are we going to do this?" I asked. "Piggy back?"

"No way, I'm not having your junk pressed up against my back. We'll do this bridal style, unless you're okay with me dragging you across the ground. I can add some new gravel rash to the lot Rose gave you."

That was not ideal.

"No, thanks. Let's just get this over and done with."

Emmett swooped me up before I even knew what was happening and I got lightheaded. He didn't even give me enough time to get my bearings before he took off running. I didn't dare bury my head against him like I had with Bella, so the wind and small drops of rain pelted my face painfully. Emmett the stupid motherfucker wasn't being careful and he ran too close to a branch and it scratched across my face. He didn't even notice until it started bleeding and he stiffened up for a moment before relaxing. I didn't relax, I couldn't. Blood plus vampires couldn't be a good thing.

I didn't even realize we had arrived or stopped until Emmett pushed me away from him and yelled, no homo. Thankfully Bella caught me before I hit the ground.

"Emmett," she hissed. "He's human, you need to be careful with him, he's breakable. What did he do to you?" Bella asked as she traced the scratches on my face. I looked up into her golden eyes and suddenly felt safe enough to joke again.

"Emmett took me against me will," I said, full on tears in my eyes. "I told him no, but he wouldn't listen, he just wanted my ass."

"That is not true," Emmett said, trying to get to me. Rose held him back. "Jasper's a liar, he's lying. I didn't touch him. …Well I did touch him, but not inappropriately."

"Children," Carlisle chided, "that's enough." He looked at me specifically and I quickly sobered up and we all seemingly silently moved on.

"Let's pick teams, Edward, Jasper, you can be team leaders, no mated couples. So I'm on Jasper's team and Bella you're on Edward's. Jasper can choose first."

I looked at my options. I had Rose, Emmett, Alice or Garrett. I knew I wanted Rose and Alice, but I had to think of a way to get Edward not to choose the one I didn't.

"Alice," I said, winking at Rose. Edward groaned and I knew I had made the right decision. Garrett went and stood behind Edward. It was down to two.

"Emmett," Edward said, sighing. He wasn't happy about it at all.

"Yes," I said, bringing Rose into a man hug, slapping her on the back, okay, that hurt. I constantly forget that vampires are made of stone.

"What do you know that I don't?" Emmett asked. I didn't bother replying to that, the list was way too long.

"Emmett, are you batting or fielding first?" Carlisle asked.

Emmett looked at me closely, but I wasn't giving anything away.

"We'll bat," he said and I smiled, much to his annoyance.

We split off into our two groups and Carlisle handed me a glove.

"Can I pitch?" I asked and they all looked at me like I was crazy. "If I suck after the first inning then feel free to pull me, but I know I can do this," I told them confidently. I knew that I had to be pitching to affect this game, to bend it in my favor.

"Alice?" Carlisle asked.

"He can pitch," she said, searching the future. "I can tell him when the thunder's coming."

Alice threw me the ball and we got set up. This would be easy. Vampire skills did not make you a great baseball player, skill did. I stood on the mound and waited for my first batter. I hoped it was anyone but Bella. Although I had no problem with besting her, I just didn't want to. Edward stood up to the plate and I smiled, this would be easy. I cleared my mind the best I could and he looked at me confused. He definitely relied on his gift too much.

"Bella, please stand behind Jasper," Carlisle said once he saw just how close I was to Edward. I clearly couldn't throw as far as them.

"Give them hell," Bella said, confidently as she stood behind me. I liked that she had faith in me.

Edward was too easy to strikeout. I didn't even need to do anything. I did my fastball which wouldn't have been fast for him at all and then when he went to swing I would think of Emmett and Carlisle having sex and Edward missed every single time.

"That's one," Carlisle said, "two more to go."

Edward grumbled and threw the bat at Emmett.

Emmett had no gift, but I was confident. All three pitches to Edward were dead on and I knew Emmett had been watching them so all I had to do was throw a changeup. I took my stance and pulled my arm back, everything was the same except the placement of my hand on the ball. I threw it harder than my fastball and Emmett smirked as he swung at it. The moment he expected to make contact the ball dropped down and he missed it completely. He spun around like a ballerina with the force he was using and he hit the bat on the ground in frustration. Emmett expected the same again, so I threw a fastball and he was too low. Next I threw a curve ball and he hit it, but it fouled off. I ended it on another fastball and once again he wasn't expecting that and he struck out. I just had to laugh at him.

"Just you wait until you're batting," Emmett said. "I never pitch, but I'm going to start."

I wasn't worried.

Garrett stepped up and I didn't even bother with any games. I knew he was just as smart as me, if not smarter. I threw a fastball, dead on and he made contact, sending it flying. Now I just needed to put my trust in my team. I could hardly see what was going on, but when Garrett rounded second base and Alice ran to behind home I knew it would be a close one.

"Duck," Bella said as she pulled me down. The ball went flying over our heads and Alice caught it, just in time and tagged Garrett out.

"Three out," Rose said, "we're up."

"This is not fair," Emmett whined. "Who knew that Jasper was a freaking baseball God, he better be the first one batting."

"Well done, Jasper," Carlisle said, clapping me on the shoulder. "I'm so proud of you."

"Thanks," I smiled up at him. "So who's batting first?"

"Jasper should," Alice said knowingly and no one questioned her. Fine by me.

I grabbed the bat and swung it a couple of times. It was so good playing a sport I loved again. I looked up and Emmett was ready to pitch to me. I walked slowly over to the home plate, coming up with a plan. I decided I would try and see if I could manipulate his emotions, I had done it before, so I should be able to do it again. I got a good read on him and when I was ready I stepped up. I waited until he pulled his arm back before I sent him some irritation. He faltered when he released the ball and it was low, too low.

"Ball," Carlisle called and I smirked.

"That's not fair," Emmett said. "We're not allowed to use our gifts."

"Gifts? What gifts?" I asked. "You don't even have one."

Okay, baiting him might have been a mistake. I didn't have time to manipulate him this time and I could tell that he was out to get me. I had been against a pitching machine before and I knew the key was to swing early. The moment the ball left Emmett's hand I swung and I made contact. My happiness was short lived, although the ball landed in play, the force of the ball hitting the aluminum bat and subsequently my rigid arms, snapped them and I screamed out in pain. The stupid motherfucker had broken my arm, if not both. Okay, that was not smart at all.

"Jasper, Jasper," Bella said, catching me before I hit the ground, yet again. "What did you do?" she snarled at Emmett.

"I'm fine," I said breathing through the pain, but everyone knew I was lying. The bone snapping was so loud we all must have heard it. And boy did it hurt.

"Oh no," Alice said. "I didn't see… I couldn't tell," she whispered, but I could feel her deceit. She was lying, but I knew this had nothing to do with my broken arms. Emmett made a split decision, she never would have seen it, this was something else.

"What is it?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"They were traveling much quicker than I thought. I can see I had the perspective wrong before," she muttered. "They heard us playing and it changed their path."

"How soon?" Carlisle asked.

Was this the mysterious vampire visitors?

"Less than five minutes, they're running." Alice still seemed deceitful and I wondered why that was, but I was in too much pain to care. "They want to play."

"Can you make it?" Carlisle asked, his eyes flicking towards me. I held up my mangled arm, I wasn't going anywhere fast or silently.

"It's too late," Garrett said regretfully. He almost seemed sad. Was this how I was going to die?

"How many?" Emmett asked.

"Three."

"Three," I scoffed. "We can take three."

"You're injured," Bella said, running her hand through my hair. "There is no we." I huffed at that. I wanted to be a part of whatever this was.

Everyone deliberated and there were a lot of silent conversations, or at least silent for the only human here going on.

"We stay and we play," Carlisle said. "Alice said they were simply curious."

"What about Jasper?" Bella asked. "He's injured."

"Alice?" Carlisle pleaded.

"I can't see, it's not clear," she said and once again she was lying. What did she know?

We clearly spent too much time arguing because I was the first to see the three vampires approaching us, their red eyes screamed at me. I pushed Bella away from me with my back and stood up. I didn't want to look any weaker than I was. Bella stood by my side and wrapped her arm around me, holding me up.

They approached us confidently in closed ranks. They had a purpose, they were here for a reason, but what was it? I needed to figure it out quickly. I didn't take note of what they were wearing or their physical features, that was not important at all. I took note of their emotions and something was off. There was a connection here. I focused on the leader and he seemed gleeful and satisfied, but that wasn't it. There was something familiar here, he knew one of the Cullens and he knew them well. I tore my eyes away and looked at everyone. They all had their fight faces on, all except one, Alice.

I didn't hesitate. I pulled away from Bella and stepped forward.

"You leave her alone," I yelled and they stopped.

"Look at that," the leader said, "you bought a snack, how thoughtful."

"Now, now, James, we didn't come here for that."

I felt Alice's shock from behind me, she was terrified. I had been told that Alice didn't remember her past, but it seemed as though she was remembering something now and it had to do with James.

"You're not taking her," I reiterated and James laughed.

"She belongs to me," he said.

"Not anymore," I countered.

"Who are you?" James asked, stalking me. "You're human, you're nothing, she means nothing to you, so why protect her? You can't, you're so weak." James laughed and I fumed.

That was it. I charged him, but three things happened simultaneously. Bella and Edward grabbed me, restraining me. Alice stepped forward and offered herself willingly. And Garrett roared murderously. Everything became a blur. James grabbed Alice and they ran. He had gotten what he came for. Bella let go of me and the others gave chase, leaving me with Edward. I wished more than anything I could be with them, saving Alice, but I was stuck here.

"They'll be fine," Edward said, still holding onto me. "They'll catch up and they'll get Alice back."

Edward didn't seem too confident on this and that had me worried. Now he was the one hiding something. I was just waiting for Edward to let me go so I could find them, so I could find Bella, but I guess he just read my plan in my mind. I don't know how long we sat there, but I felt so useless. Garrett came back to us first and my head shot up. He was still feeling murderous, but this time it was directed at me and only me. I started struggling against Edward, my broken arms hurting with each and every movement, but I didn't care.

Garrett ran over to us and easily threw Edward away from me. He didn't wait. Garrett bent down and picked me up, running in the opposite direction. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I knew one thing for certain, things wouldn't be the same after this. I noticed when we left Forks, Garrett didn't stop or make sure I was alright, he just kept running. I started slipping into the darkness, the pain of my arms becoming too much for me, but I was still aware enough when I felt Garrett's teeth sink into my neck and him draining me dry. I held on for as long as I could, but it was a losing battle. So, I realized numbly, this is how I would die.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N- **You guys did exceptional with your reviews so you deserve this

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**Chapter Nineteen**

"_They'll be fine," Edward said, still holding onto me. "They'll catch up and they'll get Alice back."_

_Edward didn't seem too confident on this and that had me worried. Now he was the one hiding something. I was just waiting for Edward to let me go so I could find them, so I could find Bella, but I guess he just read my plan in my mind. I don't know how long we sat there, but I felt so useless. Garrett came back to us first and my head shot up. He was still feeling murderous, but this time it was directed at me and only me. I started struggling against Edward, my broken arms hurting with each and every movement, but I didn't care._

_Garrett ran over to us and easily threw Edward away from me. He didn't wait. Garrett bent down and picked me up, running in the opposite direction. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I knew one thing for certain, things wouldn't be the same after this. I noticed when we left Forks, Garrett didn't stop or make sure I was alright, he just kept running. I started slipping into the darkness, the pain of my arms becoming too much for me, but I was still aware enough when I felt Garrett's teeth sink into my neck and him draining me dry. I held on for as long as I could, but it was a losing battle. So, I realized numbly, this is how I would die._

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," I heard Garrett mutter as a burning sensation started. "I didn't want it to happen this way, I didn't, but your arms were broken and I need you… I need you to help me. You're like me, I know you are and you're the only one I trust. I need you to help me… I just want Alice back."

I wasn't sure if it was because the burning sensation was increasing or my confusion, but Garrett wasn't making any sense to me. He needed me, but why? And Alice… Why was I finding it so hard to remember what was going on?

"You need to remember everything. I need you to remember everything. …Oh, this goes against everything I know… Jasper, listen to my voice… I hope it isn't too late… Think of your life, everything you want to remember. You're making the change to vampire and if you don't remember everything now you'll forget it. Think of everything, your life before Forks, everything, but think of Bella most. You can't forget her, please don't forget her. Just remember everything you want to remember, but remember Bella first, please."

I did as I was instructed. I started thinking of Bella and everything we'd been through; our first meeting, our first kiss, just everything.

After that it hit me what Garrett said, that I was making the change. I couldn't comprehend it fully with the pain, but I was almost relieved. I knew I had to be changed at some point to stay with Bella and now we had crossed that bridge.

Next I thought of Charlie and Seth. I decided to gloss over the other students at Forks High as I didn't particularly want to remember them. I thought of Texas and Peter, my mother and stepfather. I considered forgetting about Maria, but in the end I chose to remember it all, in great detail. I knew that without Maria and what she did to me I would not be the person I am today and I liked who I was. More importantly, Alice and Garrett needed me to be who I was and I couldn't have that without the darkness.

I started screaming and Garrett clamped his hand over my mouth. I was aware that we were still running, we hadn't stopped and it seemed to increase the pain. Not being able to scream out loud was torture. I needed the release, but Garrett wasn't giving it to me.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he said and I could feel his sorrow clear as day. "You can't scream, Jasper, they'll hear you. I can't… I'm sorry… I hope this doesn't affect you negatively… I need to keep on his tail, I can't let him get away. He's a tracker and they're the worst kind. I don't know what he wants with Alice, but I need to find out… You need to help me… I can't lose her… Bella, remember her."

Bella. I remembered her fierceness, her vulnerability, but most importantly I remembered her love for me and exactly how it felt. It was indescribable. I think it was safe to say that I didn't want to lose any memory of her. They were all equally important to me, all special, all uniquely her. We hadn't gotten far, we hadn't shared too much, our journey was only just beginning, but that meant nothing if I forgot our beginning.

Garrett removed his hand from my mouth and I didn't even hesitate, I screamed out and I screamed loudly. It was so good to get the release I needed. It didn't lessen the pain, but it made me feel calmer. I assumed we must be somewhere isolated because I screamed until my throat was burning too. Garrett replaced his hand after a while and I was thankful for the break. The burning intensified again and I could feel it all throughout my body. It was so painful and I was certain that I would never put another human through this, it just wasn't worth it, but I guess that was the point. Immortality isn't free otherwise everyone would be doing it.

I focused solely on the burning as it flared up before leaving me slowly. It went from my head, fingers and toes slowly inwards until it reached my heart. My heart was beating so fast trying to keep up with everything, but it was no use. My heart beat it last beat and I knew this was it. I was dead. Jasper Whitlock the human was no more, but now I was so much more. Garrett stopped running and laid me down. I could hear him pleading that I would be okay; over and over again. I didn't move. The burning had left my body, but I was left with nothingness and in some ways that was worse.

"Oh please, please, please, please," Garrett said. "Please tell me that you made it and that you're fine. We all lose something, I hope you didn't lose anything important. Please, Jasper, I need you. Alice needs you… Bella needs you, do you remember Bella?"

I scrunched up my face… Bella? Who was Bella?

"Oh God, no," Garrett said.

I decided now was a good enough time to open my eyes. It was dark, but that didn't matter. I could see as clear as day. Everything, all the insignificant details. With my eyes open my other senses kicked in. I was assaulted by every sound, I could smell for miles, my skin was oversensitive, and I could taste the rain that had just passed through. It was simply sensational. There was a whole world out here I was ignoring, my human senses just didn't do it justice, though I think it was here all along, I just didn't bother to see the beauty around me.

I quickly stood and I felt taller… Taller. I felt my arms and my chest and was relieved that they felt bigger too. I ripped off my shirt and looked down at my scarred chest, but it was clear, not one mark. I remember Maria and everything she had put me through, but there were no marks anymore. I had been cleansed, I smiled. I hated my scars and now they were not a problem anymore. It made me so happy.

"Are you remembering her?" Garrett asked and my head shot up to look at him. He was a fair way away from me, his head cast downwards with his eyes on me. "You're remembering Bella aren't you?"

He was pleased, but I had no idea why.

"Who's Bella?" I asked and then I was hit with his devastation.

"No," he cried out and it was so unlike him. "No," he screamed.

It was so gut-wrenching and it affected me immediately. I fell to my knees before curling up into a ball. It felt as though my world was ending, but I had no idea why. I wondered who this Bella was and why it was so important that I remembered her.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N- **Thanks for taking the time to review, it really means a lot to me

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**Chapter 20 + 21**

"_Are you remembering her?" Garrett asked and my head shot up to look at him. He was a fair way away from me, his head cast downwards with his eyes on me. "You're remembering Bella aren't you?"_

_He was pleased, but I had no idea why._

"_Who's Bella?" I asked and then I was hit with his devastation._

"_No," he cried out and it was so unlike him. "No," he screamed. _

_It was so gut-wrenching and it affected me immediately. I fell to my knees before curling up into a ball. It felt as though my world was ending, but I had no idea why. I wondered who this Bella was and why it was so important that I remembered her. _

Garrett's devastation didn't let up and I started to get small glimpses of a girl with brown hair and golden eyes. I knew who she was instantly. I was trying so hard to make Garrett believe I had forgotten her, but I knew I never would. Bella was my soulmate, my forever, I was doing all this because of her… I would never forget her, but Garrett, he didn't need to know that. I had to fool him, it's the only card I had. Garrett was raised in war, he was smarter than me on these types of things. I had no idea what his game was here, so anything I could use against him was a bonus. I needed to have the upper hand without him realizing it. The first mention of Bella I could feel his feelings clear as day. He loved her, he cared for her; during the change he made sure I remembered her, so I knew just how important she was. So for now, I would play dumb and I would not remember her.

I peeked up at Garrett and he was definitely in a rage. His emotions still surrounded me, but I found that with the more time I was exposed to them the more I could simply forget them. I just got used to them. I slowly uncurled from my ball and stood up. I still couldn't believe how tall I felt, I knew it could only be a few inches taller at most, but it felt like more to me. Garrett was still throwing a hissy fit. I wanted to act like a normal new vampire would, but I had no reference. I never asked and now I was unsure. I decided to just stay silent unless I had something useful to say. Garrett finally snapped out of it and he turned his attention onto me.

"Why are you just standing there?" Garrett asked. "Did you come across wrong? It wouldn't be the first time," he muttered to himself. "Why did I think this was a good idea? Alice, right, I need him for Alice. I've changed so many humans, I can do this. I can swing this in my favor. I just need to get Alice back… Can he even hear me? Jasper, can you hear me?"

I looked at him, but stayed silent. I wondered why he was talking out loud to himself, maybe something had snapped inside of him, maybe he was the damaged one here.

"I know he can talk, he reacted to Bella before…" Garrett paused, looking at me, trying to figure me out. I didn't move a muscle. "Forget it, forget him," Garrett said. "Think of this like normal. First thing first, he needs to be fed, we need blood. Let's go," he said. I didn't move so he grabbed me by the arm and started pulling me along. He was still muttering to himself, but it was unintelligible. His emotions didn't lie though, he was feeling regret, sadness and he actually feared for his life and I suspect Alice's. Simply put, he was feeling helpless. I wished I could ease some of his fears, but until I knew I was safe and what he planned to use me for I had to be careful.

"Do you want animal or human blood?" he asked me and I looked at him blankly. This wasn't a question I had really thought about. I figured I had more time, but that wasn't true. I understood why Garrett changed me. He panicked. His mate had been taken and he thought I was the only one who could help him. Perhaps he saw my recently broken arms as a hindrance and just decided that it would be easier if I was indestructible. But why did he need me? He was some solider in a vampire army and I was a nobody, so why did he need me?

"Why did you change me?" I asked, clear as day.

"I need you to get Alice back for me," he said simply, truthfully. "I found out about James forty years ago and I tried to track him down, but I could never get close enough to him. I've seen you, I've heard the others, you're smart, you know things, what to do, how to do it, I just thought that maybe you'd be able to get to him. You're like me, Jasper, I knew it before I even met you. I could sense it in the ways the other's talked about you. You've been through hell and made it out the other side, just like me. We're alike and I need you. I trust you. Alice is my mate and we may not be perfect for each other, but she is mine and I want her back. You need to help me get her back."

Everything he was saying was earnest and honest and I knew he believed everything he said.

"Where is she? What does he want with her?" I asked.

"Somewhere near Biloxi, Mississippi. I put my ear to the ground, gathered all the information I could and told Alice. She doesn't remember her life before and everything I told her didn't change that fact. Alice was put in a mental institution before she was changed and there was a vampire there, he protected her, but James, he caught her scent and he wanted her. The vampire changed Alice to stop this from happening and James killed him for doing so. James wanted Alice, but he was denied. He found her but she was already a vampire, so he left her with promise of returning at some point… I don't know what he wants with her."

He was lying about a lot of things. Alice didn't lose her memory, she remembered James, that's the only way Garrett would know this much, but he was being truthful when he said he didn't know what James wants. Garrett was still scared for his mate. There were still a lot of unknowns, but I was one hundred per cent sure about one thing.

"I want animal blood," I said and Garrett was confused. "Go get me something, I don't trust myself. Bring it back here."

Garrett faltered unsure, so I sent him some trust. He nodded his head and left. The moment I could no longer hear him, or feel him, I left for Mississippi. I now knew the goal; to save Alice from James, and I knew that Garrett was a wild card I could do without. I needed to do this on my own because I was the only person I trusted. Plus, the sooner I could get all this sorted the sooner I could get back to Bella, I hoped.

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**A/N- **One of the things that annoys me most about Twilight is that James is portrayed as a skilled tracker who would never give up, so why would he give up on Alice? And furthermore, why would he even fixate on Bella at the baseball field when he sees Alice again for the first time? He wouldn't. It's so fucking stupid and that's why I'm writing it out this way, the proper way


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N- **Thank you so much for taking the time to review, it means so much to me

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**Chapter 22 + 23**

"_I want animal blood," I said and Garrett was confused. "Go get me something, I don't trust myself. Bring it back here." _

_Garrett faltered unsure, so I sent him some trust. He nodded his head and left. The moment I could no longer hear him, or feel him, I left for Mississippi. I now knew the goal; to save Alice from James, and I knew that Garrett was a wild card I could do without. I needed to do this on my own because I was the only person I trusted. Plus, the sooner I could get all this sorted the sooner I could get back to Bella, I hoped._

As I headed to Biloxi I called Rose. She was the only one I could trust right now.

"Jasper, is that you?" she asked and even from here I could feel that she was upset.

"Don't speak, listen. I need you, and if you must bring your mate then do so, but get to Mississippi right now. I have shaken Garrett, but it won't be long until he realizes and I need back up."

"Jasper, Bella's not-"

"I don't want to hear it," I roared before softening my voice. "I can't, not now, okay. Just please come and don't tell the others."

"Okay," Rose said and I could feel her acceptance. "I will be there for you."

"Thank you, Rose."

I crossed into Mississippi and headed straight for Biloxi. I needed to find Alice before Garrett found me. Though I wasn't stupid, part of me believed that this was Garrett's plan all along, he wanted me to go in alone for whatever reason. I knew he was scared, but surely he wasn't scared of James. I doubted James had fought in any wars. When I hit the outskirts I stopped and scented the air. I wasn't sure what I was looking for. I hadn't been around Alice long enough to know her scent, but I thought that maybe now that I was a vampire something would stand out for me, but nothing did.

I quickly dismissed this method and tried my gift instead. I pushed it out from me and tried to focus on any negative emotions, any fear. I also tried to find Alice's shyness. I got a glimmer of something and I didn't even think, I just ran in blind. I came across two humans, their hearts were pumping loudly and their blood smelled so good. I stopped and observed them. I wanted them, I wanted their blood, I knew that much, but I still hadn't decided what kind of blood I wanted. Animal seemed unnatural, but human blood seemed wrong because just hours before I was still human. It was almost like cannibalism and I wasn't sure I could do it. I left the humans be as this was not a situation that needed intervention and ran.

I was sure by now that Garrett had simply let me go. It wasn't very smart on his part, but I knew he must have his reasons. Whatever was about to happen, whatever was going on with Alice, he couldn't be there, he didn't trust himself, but he trusted me. I stopped and closed my eyes again. I thought long and hard about everything I had ever sensed from Alice and then I searched for it. When I felt nothing, I started running, still searching. I was making wide loops around Biloxi getting further and further out. I didn't know if this would pay off, but it's the only idea I had.

I felt another glimmer, but I didn't rush in this time. I got closer and closer, making sure it really was Alice, and when I was sure I stopped to investigate further. Up ahead was a large ominous building, completely rundown. I focused on what I thought was Alice and it definitely reminded me of her. I took my focus off her and searched the area for other emotional signatures. At the baseball field James was not alone, but now he seemed to be as there was only one other with Alice and I knew it could only be him. I started creeping closer, wanting to be able to hear them and find out what state Alice was in.

"I told you I would be back," James' voice reached me, "though I will admit that it was a surprise finding you in Forks. We were just passing through. Do you remember me yet?"

"N-n-n-no," Alice stammered and there was the deceit once again, but I could tell now that it was solely for self-preservation.

"What happened to you?" James asked. "You were so vivacious as a human. Sure the shock therapy treatments took some of your zest away, but I assumed that with time you would have gotten it back, but you haven't. I'm disappointed. I should have just killed you when I found you after your change, but I didn't. I was foolish. And now… You're just a disgrace, a waste of space. I should just kill you."

I kept moving towards them. They were somewhere in this old building, but I didn't enter because I could tell that James wasn't ready to kill Alice, though I suspected that he wasn't going to kill her at all. If he had it in him he would have done it decades ago, but here we are.

"I remember the day I first came across you, you were such a spitfire. I kept my distance, you had a vampire protector and a gift. I knew it would be hard to get close to you, so I didn't, but I was close enough to hear you and understand you. Long after all the others had given up you kept on fighting, you rebelled, but look at you know, you're a shell of the woman you once were. Maybe that's what you lost, your tenacity, though I doubt it. I think you're just suppressing it. Tell me I'm wrong?" James roared.

"I…I…I don't know what you want from me," Alice's small voice came out and it was in that moment that it hit me. The missing piece of the puzzle, the reason why Garrett and Alice weren't compatible, the deceit, Alice was hiding her true self. James had described her as vivacious, tenacious and a spitfire, but that wasn't the Alice I knew at all. She had buried it deep, but why? To keep James from killing her, perhaps.

"What do I want from you?" James asked. "Well to begin with I wanted you as my mate, but now I have Victoria for that. I would take you as a pet, but… Hmm… No, that may work. The old you would have been too hard to keep in line, but this you… It may just work. Stay quiet whilst I figure this out."

I listened as James walked away from Alice and I made my move. I went silently, but quickly into the building. The moment Alice saw me her fear spiked, she was scared for me, she was also shocked that I was now like her. I held up my hand to silence her and she nodded. I pointed to my eyes next and she looked at me closely. I sent her some trust and she nodded her head. I didn't know if this would work, but it was my only choice. I made a decision for Alice to see. I decided in my head to tell her that she needed to let her old self come back, that it was the only way to defeat James. She was confused, but then she slipped into a vision. I hoped this would work and that it showed her a solution.

I couldn't stay any longer because James was coming back. I quickly snuck out. I could hear James scenting the room, but he soon forgot it. I hoped that because I was new I didn't smell yet, either way James was focused on Alice, not me and that was a good thing. James was feeling mischievousness and wonderment towards Alice and her gift. Alice's emotions settled down and I knew her vision had finished, I hoped she made the right decision.

"What did you see?" James asked. "What do I make you do? Let me know and we can save us some time and some torture."

Alice's emotions were shifting, she was deciding something important.

"Fuck off," Alice spat at him and I could finally feel her inner strength, it was beautiful.

"What did you say to me?" James asked shocked, but he quickly recovered. "I must admit I missed the old Mary-Alice."

"I'm not afraid of you. You're going to die, do you know that? I've seen it and it's the only outcome."

"Ah, now, it's not nice to tell someone their fate, you must know that, Mary-Alice."

"Don't call me that, my name is Alice." Alice's anger was rising, it was good to feel.

I could tell that she wanted to call out to me to help her, but I knew that she must do this on her own. Alice's anger boiled over and she attacked James, he was shocked for a second, but then he fought back. I couldn't see what was going on, so I slowly snuck back inside. I came into the room and Alice was pinned to the floor by James, but what surprised me was that James was missing an arm and had huge gashes down his back. He was seeping venom. I was about to step in and help when I heard a primal growl. I turned just in time to see a furious Garrett in the doorway. James let go of Alice instantly.

I backed away from them until my back was against the wall. I was too enthralled to run and hide like I probably should, or to even help fight. I just watched on amazed as Alice and Garrett's emotions lined up for the first time and they began feeding off each other, working in tandem to defeat James. It was quite the sight to behold. They really were each other's equals and I was glad I had witnessed it. James was killed and burned and I could feel the lust increasing in both Alice and Garrett. I found enough sense to back out of the room, but it hardly mattered as I caught sight of Garrett throwing Alice over his shoulder and running away. I breathed a sigh of relief and turned around, all was right and James was dead.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N-** Thank you so much for taking this journey with me and to all of those who read and reviewed, much appreciated

**Disclaimer- **I don't own Twilight

Enjoy

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**Chapter 24 + Epilogue**

I left Garrett and Alice and headed back across the US. I wanted to be home with my mate. Vampirism was hard to get used to. I moved faster than I ever imagined possible, my mind was oddly clear, and I could just feel my strength. I wasn't sure how I felt about my new life. I didn't mind being a human, but I knew I must change one day to be with Bella forever, but Garrett had taken that choice out of my hands. I guess it didn't matter. Missing school wasn't a bad thing. I only had two issues; Charlie and Seth.

I didn't know how these things worked, but I was certain the Cullens wouldn't allow me to be with my father anymore, the risk was too great. He was a human, my food source, though I was still undecided on what I wanted my diet to be. I was waiting to ask Bella's opinion. Seth on the other hand was a wolf, or a potential wolf. I didn't want to end my friendship with him, I liked him, but maybe I didn't have a choice. There were too many unknowns. I just needed to get home.

As I passed by Texas I wondered whether I should stop and check up on Maria. It would be so easy for me to confront her now. I was no longer weak; she wouldn't be able to best me, to manipulate me. I would finally come out on top. I decided it was not worth it. I was angry and I didn't want to be blinded by it and do something I would regret. I would just leave it be, but when I had calmed down I would check on her and make sure she couldn't scar any other young boys like she did me.

I was surprised Bella hadn't tracked me down yet. We were mates, so surely she could feel the same pull in the chest as me, yet she was nowhere to be seen. There were so many factors that could have kept her away, but I hoped she'd disregarded them. Maybe she knew I was okay, just like I knew she was. Either way I could feel her in Washington and I was heading straight for her.

I entered Forks and went straight for the Cullen house, straight for Bella. The house was empty except for her. I stopped in the living room and I saw her huddled in the corner. She might have been okay physically, but mentally she was far from it. I stood my ground and pushed my love out towards her. She whimpered and buried her head further into her knees.

"Bella," I said, clear as day and her head shot up.

She looked so heartbroken. I wished I could feel how she was feeling, but she had a tight lock on her emotions.

"Bella," I repeated and she began muttering.

"It's not real. He's not real. He died, Garrett told me. He doesn't remember me, I'm not his. He's not mine."

I couldn't stand Bella acting like this so I disregarded my instincts to stay away and closed the gap between us. I sunk to my knees and wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm here, Bella, I'm here," I said, opening up my feelings so she could feel everything. "I didn't die, I'm just a vampire. I never forgot you, never. You're the first thing I remembered. I would never forget you, you're the most important vampire in my life. You're my mate. I'm yours from now until forever. Please come back to me, Bella. I'm not going to leave you. I'm not like the others. I've only ever loved you, no one else. We're mates. Please."

Bella slowly started untangling herself. I pulled back and she stared at me.

"You're really mine?" she asked.

"Yes, Bella, only yours."

"What did you lose?" she asked me. "Everybody loses something. I thought you had lost me."

I remembered Garrett saying the same thing. I wasn't sure what I had lost. I thought about how I was when I was human and how I was now. Everything was intensified except one thing and I wasn't sure how I felt about it.

"What is it?" Bella asked, picking up on my sadness.

"I used to be constantly thinking and planning, always trying to stay ahead of the game, and now, there's nothing. I had some when I saved Alice, but I think that's because it was fresh in my mind, an unfinished mission. Now there's nothing. It's oddly freeing, but scary. I liked being on top of everything, but now I can only think of you."

"Do you miss it?" she asked me. "Do you regret becoming a vampire?"

"No regrets," I answered honestly. "I'm not sure if I miss it, it's too early to tell. As long as I have you, Bella, I feel as though I'll be okay."

"How was the change?" she asked and I liked that she was acting more like her normal self. "How was the burn?"

"Excruciating."

"Did Garrett hurt you?" she asked.

"No, he just drained me and then the burn began. He let me scream when we were isolated. He told me to remember you and my life, but mostly you. He didn't want me to forget you."

"He cares for me."

"I know."

"I care for him too. What happened with him and Alice, are they okay?" she asked.

"Yes, everything went fine. James is dead and Alice is… well, Alice, the true Alice. Her and Garrett line up perfectly now. She was hiding her true self, but James brought it out of her. They'll be fine now, I'm sure of it."

"I killed Victoria and Laurent," Bella said. "After you were taken from me I knew they had to pay for your death."

"Good," I said.

I liked that we didn't have to worry about any repercussions from James' death. It looked like the only causality was me, but that didn't count. Having the decision taken out of my hands was a good thing. I was now a vampire and I could stay with Bella forever.

* * *

_Six months later_

"Charlie, I can't do that."

"Well, I don't care you have to."

"But what if he says no, I can't handle that reaction."

"He'll say yes, I'm sure of it, but if he doesn't I'll be here for you, always."

"Okay, I'll do it."

"Is it happening today?" Bella asked me. I turned from the house I used to live in with my father and looked at her. She was a hundred yards away from me in the forest.

"Yes, finally," I answered.

I turned back to the house and looked in through the window. It had been a tough six months since I was changed. Carlisle wouldn't allow me to be with Charlie so I had two options; I could either tell him I was dead or that I ran away. I struggled with my choice, both were not ideal, but I decided on running away as I still had one game plan left from my human life and if it worked out I would be able to be in Charlie's life again.

"Peter, you have to do it," Charlie said. My eyes were glued to my father and best friend.

A month after I was changed, Peter showed up looking for me. His parents were killed in a car accident and he was finally free. No longer did he have to pretend to be straight. He dumped his girlfriend Charlotte and headed to the only person who had accepted him fully, me, but I was no longer there.

I watched them from day one. Charlie took him in without hesitation. I think Peter reminded Charlie of me, and after a couple of months Charlie made it permanent and started the process of adopting him. I found it hilarious when Peter argued for the surname of Whitlock and not Swan. Charlie gave in, he couldn't deny Peter anything. I was glad Peter could fill the void I left behind, it was good for everyone involved.

"Come on, Jasper," Bella said impatiently, "we can grab a snack on the way."

I smiled and headed to her. I had chosen animal blood for many reasons, the main one being Bella. It's all she's ever had and I figured if she could live on it then so could I.

I joined Bella's side and kissed her. I loved her so much, perhaps too much. I was so lucky to find her. Living with the Cullens had been an easy transition. I still admired Carlisle, but Edward grew to love it. We all knew I wouldn't act on it. Carlisle was just a good looking man. Emmett had grown to accept me, but I think Rose played a big role in that. And Garrett and Alice balanced each other. Alice was no longer shy and Garrett was no longer controlled by his beast. He told us it disappeared and that Alice was enough for him now. He even stopped drinking human blood. I keep researching PTSD and helped him as often as I could. He never said anything, but I could tell he appreciated it.

I grabbed a quick snack with my mate and then we enjoyed each other's bodies. It was only a quick romp because I didn't want to miss the event that would start the process of me being able to be back in not only Charlie's life, but Peter's as well.

We headed for the reservation and I started getting nervous. I had started this plan when I was human, but I didn't get much time to make sure it would happen, but I hoped I had done enough. Bella reached out and grabbed my hand, offering me her support. We stopped at the treaty line and waited.

Charlie and Peter arrived on the reservation and my nervousness increased. This was it.

"I don't want to do it," Peter said, not getting out of Charlie's cruiser.

"I don't care what you want," Charlie said, "just go and do it already." Peter didn't move. "If you don't do it I'm grounding you. No Xbox, no TV, no phone, no trips to the reservation."

"That's not fair," Peter said.

He got out of the car. Charlie stayed and watched, just like us.

Peter grudgingly walked up to the house and knocked on the door. This was it.

I almost ripped Bella's hand off when the person answered the door. I could feel Peter's fear, so I sent him some confidence, but it may have been too little too late. Peter took a deep breath and opened his mouth.

"Will you, umm, go out on a date with me?" he asked and I closed my eyes, praying that they would accept.

"Are you serious?" they asked. I opened my eyes and Peter nodded his head yes. "Of course," Seth answered and I breathed a sigh of relief. Seth said yes.

"I told you it would happen," Bella said to me and I could feel just how happy she was for me.

It was still early days, but if Peter and Seth grew close like I knew they would, then in time Seth would become a wolf and Peter would know, then Charlie, and then I could finally re-enter their lives because there were no laws that said wolves couldn't know we existed, and Charlie would be associated with the wolves. It would all work out perfectly. It just had to. I missed my dad too much.

"It'll work out," Bella said, "and if it doesn't we'll find another way. You saved me so I'll do this for you, whatever it takes."

I smiled at her and brought her in for another kiss. My life was perfect and soon it would be complete.

**THE END**

* * *

**A/N- **Yes, that's the end. No plan for a sequel at this stage. Thank you for sticking with me

**2017 - **Thank you for taking the time to read my story. If you liked it please consider following my current writing endeavors on WordPress, Facebook and Twitter. All links are on my profile page


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